


Blame it on Dead Pool**hiatus**

by Caroaimezoe



Category: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Dark, Emotional Hurt, Emotional Manipulation, Extremely Dubious Consent, Implied/Referenced Torture, M/M, Puberty, Spitefic, Turtlecest (TMNT), Unrequited Crush, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-15
Updated: 2020-07-04
Packaged: 2021-03-01 16:33:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 13
Words: 68,369
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23670118
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Caroaimezoe/pseuds/Caroaimezoe
Summary: Puberty can be a traumatic period. Mixed with a few weeks of torture, the personality can take a drastic turn, even the more cheerful one.
Relationships: Leonardo/Michelangelo (TMNT)
Comments: 84
Kudos: 48
Collections: Dark stories





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Tcest, dark, no beta. Don't like don't read.  
> Mash-up of my Prozac one-shot for the Turtlesutra fanbook and one of my French fic.

_October 31, 2019_

_Hi Clark!_

_Today was my 16th birthday. I received great gifts. Raph offered me a friend: he found a ginger kitten in an alley. Her mother was dying beside her babies, with the body flattened by a tire. Raph said he chose Klunk because he seemed to be an annoying little shit, pissing off his siblings like me. He took pity on them. I am thrilled! I always wanted a pet. He also snatched some candies for me. I’m not allowed to go topside at Halloween anymore since I followed the wrong people into the wrong place and ended almost killed about ten years ago. It gave Leo the idea to put my birthday there, for me to feel less tempted to sneak out, I suppose. Before, our birthday was all the same day, since we mutated together. Master Splinter drew from a bag number and months and since then, we got all different birthday. Leo had made divided it in a ration. I’m allowed to eat 0,4 pounds a day. He weighted it all in portion side bag._

_Don gave me a new console with a dozen games and accessories. He found it at the junkyard. I am super happy. Leo felt bad because he simply gave you to me. He says that with Splinter's departure and by the time he returns, I need to find someone to talk to. So, there you are, my diary now. He told me to write to you EVERYDAY. That it would do me good and improve my syntax (what is it?) So I'm going to do it, because I don't want to disappoint or disobey Leo. I will NEVER do this._

_I decided to call you Clark because it is the first name of the alter ego of Superman and I love Superman! He's my favorite Super Hero after my brother Leo. That's it for today, Clark_!

Mikey put down his orange gel pen, offered by Leo with the diary and the drawing book. He was tired, his stomach heavy with Neapolitan ice cream. He reread the entry to his journal to make sure it was convincing.

He wasn’t a fool like his brothers thought. The diary wasn’t a random gift. The leader, so honorable, was going to read it, secretly. Leo had to be convinced that he was happy. His brother, since their Sensei had not returned from his pilgrimage, six months ago was on edge. Splinter had promised to return before Raph's seventeenth birthday in June, but that was not the case. And Leo took this absence or the responsibilities that came with it, very hard.

He and Donnie spent hours finding ways to survive financially. Mikey may be a god in the kitchen, he could not do miracles with a $ 30 per week and leftovers from the trash, for 4 teens like them. Fortunately, Don, genius as he was, had found, with the help of Casey and April, ways to make money, quite legally at first. Mikey, for the first three months, had a budget of a hundred dollars more, weekly, but now that April and Casey weren’t their friends anymore, the leader was stressed about their survival.

Leo said Splinter was coming back, but Mikey doubted it. He had heard Raph arguing with Donnie: the old rat was dead or had abandoned them.

But the truth was that Mikey didn't care. Master Splinter there, there were lots of rules and he hated that. Mikey was always disappointing, according to their Sensei. Not giving its full potential, etc. With Leo, there were almost as many rules and criticisms, but it was not the same thing.

Never mind because, despite the shit he had written in his journal, he was not so happy. It had nothing to do with brothers’ gift, so well found. Right now, sticking his nose in Klunk's soft fur, brought him almost… sensual well-being.

Even saying the word in one thought filled him with warmth in his stomach.

In the past few weeks, or rather months, this kind of chills came to him more often and he almost always felt like an electric current circulating under his skin. In fact, since about Leo's 18 year birthday in September. Nothing special had happened that day, but it was the moment when he had felt this hypersensitivity for the first time.

He hadn't consulted his brother Donatello about it because he found the feeling quite pleasant and didn't want it to stop. It made him feel alive, whereas, for the past year, he felt, in general, slowly suffocating.

He lay on his back, Klunk purring at his side and slowly slid his hand down his chest, gently stroking the opening concealing his cock.

He had known about this activity for two weeks now and since then, he engaged in it as frequently as possible. He had learned about it one night, as he tossed in his bed, unable to sleep, as had been happening to him more and more in the past few months.

He had gotten up to eat a little something, thinking that perhaps, his little hollow prevented him from sleeping and he had been surprised by the sound of small muffled moans. Curious and for once, silent, he had sneaked to get a look.

The spectacle had troubled him. He didn't have a good view of the exact movie Raph was watching, but he suspected it was the kind that Leo didn't want them to watch. Anyway, Raph was alone, lit only by the glare coming from the television, whose sound had been cut off, at 1 am, said enough. But that was not what had caught Michelangelo's attention the most, like what was going on between the thighs of his angry brother.

Raph held his in his hand and rubbed it up and down. Mikey could watch, without much fear of being discovered, because his brother had his eyes closed. Raph’s whole face was transfigured by pleasure and Mikey had turned back to his room, troubled and uneasy.

Once in bed, he had looked cautiously at the bottom of his breastplate. He had never done anything with his dick other than washing and pissing with it. But what Raph had done seemed simple to do and enjoyable. Mikey admired everything about his older brothers, so it was not the first time that he was going to imitate their behavior.

He had brought out his cock and had tried a few movements similar to those he had seen Raphael do. The electric wave had returned, much stronger and Mikey had had to bite into his pillow to stifle his complaints due to the pleasure of losing his mind, which he was experiencing for the first time.

It was a week ago and since then, as soon as he had a moment alone, he jerked off. Which had led him, for the past two weeks, to isolate himself more than before? This sudden need for solitude must have excited his older brother's paranoia, hence the gift from the diary which he probably hoped to find answers to. Leo, at times, was far too transparent for his own good.

He chased the thought from his mind and decided to focus on pleasure.

_November 2_

_Dear Clark,_

_Today I had permission to watch Deadpool. Leo, as a good big brother, monitors a lot what we watch and relies on the rating to explain his rules. I was really looking forward to watching it because I had read that it was the most popular movie under the Marvel banner. I love Marvel. And DC. I can't say which one I like the best ... Anyway, DP is rated 17+ and over, it made Leo hesitate a lot, but Raph said it was exaggerated. Don had added that in Canada, just a few hours ride from here, it was rated 13 +. He had added I should survive to a movie and that, for a guy who had beheaded with his katanas a Purple Dragon last week, he found Leo hypocritical. At Don’s bold statement, Leo was speechless. I will NEVER say such a horrible thing about my beloved big brother. If Donnie wants to talk back, even if it's for my sake, he is the one having to get punished, not me._

_So, I watched the movie. It was hilarious. AT the end, DP's girlfriend remains his girlfriend even if he is disfigured. I find it too cool. So, me too then, if I find the right one, a girl will love me even though I am a mutant. I mean, I'm completely more adorable than DP, I have so much humor and I'm also a good fighter, right? I don’t see why it wouldn’t happen._

_Leo stayed next to me the whole movie. To keep me company, he's so nice. There was a time when he knocked over the popcorn and asked me to make more. He didn’t want to pause the film because, according to him, there was "nothing interesting at this point and the plot wasn’t moving forward."_

_I obeyed. I didn't rewind the movie to see this scene at all afterwards, when Leo's shell was turned. Leonardo is always right. If he says that the scene where DP and his girlfriend were naked was useless, that must be true._

_I don't think Leo liked the movie though. He kept pointing out mistakes and inaccuracy into how the character held his katanas. My older brother sometimes has trouble letting his job outside our home and forget about his inner swordsman. But yeah, I mean I totally get it. The guy who is writing the fight scene sucks big time._

_It's really nice to be 16 now. Don said he was going to teach me how to drive. I’m bugging about it for now three years. He was always replying; I was too young. Like Raph, Leo, and he had waited to be legal for driving. Anyway, nunchakus are not more legal and well, I’ve carried them around since I’m 6 years old. Raph didn’t wait to be 21 to drink, anyway. I'm not the one who drinks beers, by the way. If Leo finds a Sapporo can, it’s not mine, it’s Raph. I don't want to drink beer. It's Raph. It is he who must be punished._

_Good night Clark, I'm exhausted. I will fall asleep immediately._

Rereading his entry, Mikey wondered if he was protesting too much to convince Leo. He supposed that no, and after a caress to Klunk, he grabbed his cock in a now natural gesture.

He thought back to the film he had seen with Leo, his brother, too stressed by the mature rating to go to meditate or do his kata as usual. He had briefly felt bad thus interfering in the routine of his elder, then, he had said that it was the problem of Leonardo if he was also mother hen. And, after all, sharing a moment of relaxation with the leader was increasingly rare. As well as enjoying it.

Obviously, from the hot scene, when he felt the first tingle of excitement climb, Leo, pink like a peony (at least, as much as a turtle can be) had "awkwardly" knocked the bowl down of popcorn, placed on the coffee table, with his foot.

Mikey had found the coincidence too well synchronized and his suspicions had been confirmed when Leo, when it was having done the mess, had sent him to do another one, refusing to put the film in pause precisely during this scene. Despite everything, he had obeyed, knowing that direct confrontation with the Fearless Leader brought nothing good when submission eventually made him lower his guard.

Revisiting the scene, on Donnie's old laptop, in his bedroom, during Leo's meditation hour before bed, had been child's play. Leo always came to tuck him in before this hour and in his naivety, he believed that Mikey fell asleep without a thought, as soon as he walked past the door. For the past two weeks, in fact, he had been thinking a lot. Especially about sex. Essentially, rather.

Since he had walked on Raph, he had learned a lot about sex. Even today, he had taken advantage of the fact that Donnie and Raph were busy in the garage to search the turtle's room and know how to borrow the engineer's second laptop.

His quest had not been in vain. He had found two magazines under Raph's mattress and a movie, a real mature deal one. The research on the laptop had given even more exciting results about there were other spots on the body to feel good. 

Since then Mikey couldn't help himself. Writing in the diary, with his titanium erection had been painful, but Leo had specified that he wanted a daily entry, so he had no choice. As soon as his orgasm hit, he always fell asleep so he needed to write before giving himself some loving.

It had been two weeks just masturbating. It was time for him to push the exploration of his body further.

Cautiously, he made circles around his hole with his finger, after having wet it, while continuing his movements back and forth on his member with the other hand. The caress was already pleasant, giving him delicious shivers and he grew bold enough to breach the ring of muscle with the tip of his finger. The pain made him hoist between his teeth and he withdrew his finger to continue massaging around the area, which seemed to him much more comfortable as a sensation. The extra stimulation led him faster than usual to climax.

He fell asleep peacefully.

_November 3,_

_Hi Clark,_

_Donnie wanted to see Deadpool with me. Yesterday, he couldn't because he was working. I don't really know what Don. is doing, but now we always have ice cream, so he could do what he wants, I don't care. Leo and Raph went on patrol because, it's true, I forgot, today, I was very sick, too sick to do patrol. I had the flu. It was serious! So I stayed and Don had to stay since I need babysitting and he is what we could call our doc._

_I behaved and didn’t eat more gummies than I am allowed, I swear. Donnie was watching me. He can confirm it._

_At the end of the film, I had a conversation with Don. if he believed that one day we could have a girlfriend. One day with whom we could have (_ crossed out word) fun playing Rock Band. We need a singer, you understand, Clark? To play Rock Band female songs. Donnie told me no and that it was just an American trash cliché of superheroes and that women didn't ~~fuck~~ _play Rock Band with mutants like us. I don't believe D. at all. He has lots of superficial girls who would agree_ _to touch my_ ~~cock(~~ word crossed out angrily) _microphone._

Mikey wiped his eyes sharply. He had had a whole argument about it earlier with Donatello. Donnie kept telling him that a woman would never agree to sleep with them. Donnie didn't seem surprised by his new knowledge about sexuality. No doubt he had delved into his research history. Anyway, Donnie didn’t give a flying fuck of what Mikey was doing with his body, provided he didn't catch anything contagious. He was probably going to create his own blowjob droid. His brothers were content with their wrists all their lives (at least he and Raph, he could not imagine Leo doing this), but Mikey was different. Donnie had rolled his eyes, called him Drama Queen and having a middle-child syndrome. To get rid of him, Don had promised him with a wink a real good gift for Christmas.

It had the merit of calming Michelangelo down a bit and he had calmly accepted his goodnight kiss on the forehead from his older brother, returned from patrol, his face absolutely angelic.

November 4;

_Dear Clark,_

_Since I'm getting better, I asked Leo, who seemed to be really suffering from his flu, (I mean, he was coughing a lot, I don't want to imply that yesterday, I wasn't really sick, Clark!) If I could go on patrol alone with Raph. Leo often says that Raphael is a bad influence. But he seems that his mind is too strong to be influenced because he pairs with Raph often. The ban on being alone with Raph is only for me, the crazy (striped but readable word) the innocent angel._

_Raph and I had a great time. I am tired of this long patrol now. Good night Clark._

In fact, Mikey had insisted on being alone with Raph to question him. He refused to believe Donnie and his pessimistic ideas about their future sex life. Mikey had expressed his concerns to him and Raph, having lit his cigarettes hidden under a water tower, had listened to him. Mikey had told him everything, even his episode of voyeurism, which had not seemed to anger Raph. By taking the last puff of his cigarette, he had stated;

"I won't be as definite as Don. But, I can tell you that, unless you fuck a dead woman or a passed out one or too wrecked up girl high on drugs, you have no chance, kiddo! You will do like Donnie and me and you will be satisfied with your hand or any gadget Don could build your life during.”

Tears of anger and frustration rose in the eyes of the youngest. He refused to believe it.

"What about Leo? He is the leader. If he is bothered by it, he would do something about it for our well-being." 

Raph had a sarcastic smile;

"Do you really think the heroes, the real ones, have a dick? Convince Leo that his cock can serve him in a military operation and he may remember that he has one. It's good. He probably suffers less than we do.”

Raphael's words were meant to comfort him, but Mikey doubted their veracity. Leo was made of flesh too.

_Hi Clark,_

_I went for a walk in the tunnels. Only 6 hours. Leo had no reason to panic._

Mikey didn't even want to pretend and invent reasons for his disappearance for almost an entire night. He had better things to do and too sore eyes. He had been gloomy all day, mulling over the pessimistic words of Donnie and Raph. He refused to believe it. Somewhere up there, a girl or a boy, because Mikey wasn’t picky, was there for him. The drop that had caused the vase to overflow had occurred during dinner. Leo was reading the newspaper and an entire page from the back of the newspaper was an advertisement for the Phantom of the Opera musical on Broadway. Donnie had commented on the fact that it was a shame that Mikey couldn't attend the play to get his mind back. Leo had lowered his newspaper and demanded an explanation, while Mikey angrily drew his plate.

“This play is about a hideous monster falling in love with a pretty Opera singer. He gives her private lessons, protects her, boosts her career and worships her. Finally, she turns away from him, letting him die to fall into the handsome boy's arms, ”Donnie had explained with a sour snicker.

Leo hadn't understood why Mikey should be bothered by pretty French girl romance and, much to the youngest's shame and anger, Donnie had reporter their conversation. When a pissed Mikey had snapped it was supposed to be confidential, Donatello had blatantly recalled he wasn't bond to any professional ethic being a freak who just happened to be smarter than his sibling.

Leo had scolded Don, telling that their condition was already quite painful without that them rubbing it to Mikey, so sensitive. To punish Don and Raph, he sent them doing the dishes, Mikey chores. The youngest had taken the opportunity to slip away, tears of fury blurring his vision. Raph and Don were wrong!

He was going to show them!

Saving a girl was not complicated. Girls who got into trouble were easy to find in New York! He didn't care if he was seen or not. How could she fall in love with him if she couldn’t see him? Anyway, it wouldn't endanger any of his brothers. How did the girl could know where he came from, exactly? There was no sewer plan engraved with the lair marked with an X on its shell that! To find the lair, under the thirty underground floors under the whole city wasn’t even the hardest part! It was avoiding Donatello's infallible security system. The last homeless man who had approached their hiding place from too closely had taken a 75 V discharge. Mikey lived under constant pressure to make the wrong entry code, all different, for the 3 tunnels leading to their lair. Donnie had fun creating various traps, but all deadly, and installing security cameras to "lose nothing of the spectacle" Donatello hated human, since April had spit in his face, an unknown reason three months ago. Without Leo, Mikey sometimes thought that Don would poison the city's water supplies. But Donnie was far too scared that the leader would confiscate his computer or coffee machine to do so. Donnie, despite having changed loved and respected Leo too much to do something as big behind his back. Leo said Don’s dark streak was not his fault: their new loneliness, without friends and without Splinter, affected them morally.

Mikey’s guess was that Don had been horny, had tried to make a move and April had turned him down a little too harshly. But Don had the charisma of a toaster. Mikey would be so gentleman-like that the girl would fall for him.

Mikey had waited, in the shadows, to save two drunk girls who were ambling right toward the wrong alley and laughing just loud enough to get in trouble. The fact they were two was interesting: his chances of being liked by one of them were, therefore, higher and also, he had jerked to a LOT of threesomes video. It was an opportunity to realize this fantasy! He couldn't quite see if they were pretty or not, but he was ready not to be picky.

Mikey had waited a little, just long enough for the girls to really come close to rape and death, to be more grateful. When you have Leo and Donnie as brothers, even if you are considered only as a brainless kid, you develop a strategic mind.

He had been the more show off that he could, spinning his nunchakus a little more than necessary to impress the damsels in distress. He had knocked down the three attackers and he had wanted to introduce himself like a gentleman, while putting himself in the light.

He had barely had time to notice that they looked pretty, if he wiped them off their excessive make-up, that the pepper spray blinded him and that the combined cries of the girls rang in his ears.

"A monster!”

When he had been back, Leo was waiting for him, on the verge of hysteria. Mikey hadn't done it on purpose to worry the leader: he had to cleanse his eyes more than three hours with a tank before returning while calming his rage and his pain. He had refused to explain himself.

_Clark._

_Leo points out to me that I haven't written for three days straight. I wonder how he knows about that. No doubt he wants me to explain the reasons for my lack of appetite for the past few days. I'm not hungry, that's all. I gained a little weight, after Halloween, I pay attention to my health, no need to make a fuss. Anyway, coming from a guy who only eats rice and steamed broccoli, I have no lessons to receive._

Since this night, a few days ago, Mikey had been withdrawn or, in the best cases, confronting. He had refused to tell anyone what had happened, despite Leonardo's personal attempts and those mandated by the leader from Donnie or Raph.

Raph had joked quite crudely, hoping to cheer him up. Then threatened him: “Your little emo kid act is worrying Fearless. He doesn't need this shit. There is already enough to do. So spill the beans, Mikey or you'll spit your teeth out," he had concluded, clenching his fist.

Raph was an outstanding psychologist, Mikey thought with irony, rolling his eyes at the usual threat. How old did Raph believe he was? Seven-years-old? 

But the worst was when, on the pretext of needing help, Leonardo had drawn him into the laboratory and quickly handcuffed him to a chair. He had to then undergo the big brothers' version of the good and bad cop in a grueling interrogation. Raph was the bad cop, cracking his knuckles, looking threatening. Leo, the good guy, oozing sickening compassion and Don played the role of the jaded criminal psychiatrist with ease:

“No, he doesn't tell us the truth. He blinked."

Rage took Michelangelo:

"Fuck you! I blink because I have a 120 W bulb light on me, asshole.

Concerned, Leonardo had put everyone at the door. If Mikey was to swear in his presence, it was that his little brother should no longer have his mind. Even Raph dared not put two curses in the same sentence within reach of Leo's slap. Raph and Donnie were out without asking for their rest. They had better things to do than look into the pubescent emotions of their little brother.

Once alone with him, Leonardo had then coaxed him, using all the same tricks of a mother wanting to extract from her child the identity of the person who sells him weed. Leo was famous in the family for never dropping an issue, pecking, obstinate, until his victim gave in under pressure. Mikey, observed by the sharp gray eyes, did not crack despite sweating profusely. He denied everything.

"You know Mikey that I love you like my son. Seeing you so dark makes me sad. I would do anything to make you happy,” Leo had insisted again.

"You may well. I’m the only kid you’ll ever get,” Mikey had retorted, his voice clipped. “an I leave now?”

Leonardo had nodded mournfully.

Mikey had made a beeline to his room, biting his pillow with rage, to stifle his cries of fury. He will never be a father, uncle, husband or lover, just Leo’s spoiled brat. His life was a dead end.

*******

_Hi Clark…._

_You could say that I met someone. I can't tell you his name, it's TOP secret, you know, but there you go. He came to see me and he stroked my face and then... he kissed me. Okay, he's a "he", but who needs a girl? Vagina and boobs are overrated. I now know a human girl and I couldn't have worked out. She couldn’t have known the body of mutant turtles as my secret lover. He studied it at university, in mutanlology, reptile specialization._

_First, his soft lips remained closed, then his tongue insisted on mine to open them and he gave me my first real French-kiss. He laid me gently on the shell while continuing his kiss. His tongue caressed mine and his hand caressed the inside of my thigh. It hadn't really hit me there yet, but I thought I was going to explode already. His hand went up to the opening that hides my ~~cock~~ penis and he barely had to press when he came out like a clown from a surprise box._

_He took it and I had to moan too loudly because he told me to shut up as if we were going on a mission. I mean, if I had already gone on a mission with him. I've never been there. We just met, I told you. He started to rub it and I had to bite my pillow so as not to scream. He made movements so so fast with his hand, that I immediately reached my peak. It shows that he spent his life handling katanas. Uh! No! why did I write katanas? I meant banana. He works in a restaurant where they serve breakfasts. I think I've watched DeadPool too much, I see katanas everywhere, hahaha._

_I wanted to return the favor, I really wanted to, but hey he didn't want us to get caught. You see, we were in an alley. There could have someone walking on us. So he left my room after wiping his hands with his blue towel to return to his. I slept like a baby and I had very good dreams. Now, it’s 6:15 am I never get up at this time, usually, but Leo is probably already up. I will make him the best of breakfast. Without reason. He's just a good big brother, so concerned about my well-being and I gave him a hard time lately._

* * *

Mikey dropped his pen. Writing the scene from the day before had made him horny again. He had already jerked off when he woke up, but the urge started again. He didn't know if his journal entry was discreet enough. But hey, it was only Leo who was going to read it. And Leo already knew, he thought chuckling.

Mikey had been in his room all day listening to loud music, as he often did lately. Raph had wanted to break the door down, but Leo had stopped him. Donnie, more cunning, had cut the power. But it didn’t work and Mikey stayed locked, like he had since the cute teens he had saved from a rapist had pepper-sprayed his face, calling him ‘monster’, a month ago.

That night he had returned home, crying about his life being a dead-end. He wasn’t eating either, skipping all the family meals, only snatching some sweets sometimes, and he had heard Donatello talking about Mikey should be exempted from training, having already lost fifteen pounds.

Of course, Leo had refused, answering he would ‘find a way’, while he was polishing his swords. Mikey had sneered at this. Leo didn’t understand a thing. Leo couldn’t understand how upsetting he was to be called a name by a pretty girl, after she had yelled about how ugly he was, when she should have thanked him.

Leo only knows about katana blade maintenance and bushido. Not real-life things.

Finally, one night, when he was slumbering, he felt a presence. It was dark, but he knew it could only be Leonardo picking the lock to his door without making a noise.

"I found out how to help you."

It was Leonardo's voice, but very low. Mikey opened his mouth to make a sarcastic comment, but Leo put a finger to his lips.

"I found what's wrong with you. You need love. You need sex.”

Mikey gave a jaded sigh. At another time, a few weeks ago, he might have laughed at his stuck-up big brother saying the word "sex", but this good-natured humor was now a thing of the past.

"I can give you that."

The scathing retort that Mikey was going to utter died on his lips.

"Simply imagine another person."

Leo had kissed him gently. The kiss had been rather chaste at first, but it had ignited quickly enough and they began to kiss each other as if each wanted to suck the soul of the other. Leo had stretched his hand out, abandoning his lips for a moment.

"I'm going to touch you. Just imagine another hand than mine."

Mikey couldn’t the mind filled with, "it's your brother Leo jerking you off!"

The leader’s hand was skilled Mikey was going crazy to get more friction.

"Leo, Leo ..." he begged.

The leader had raised his head.

"You can give me another name. It does not matter. Call me the name of the person you want. The important thing is that you get better."

Perplexed, Mikey had thought he didn’t really want to call Leo another name. He wanted no one at this moment more than the turtle with him, but Leo seemed to want it. Maybe it was a fantasy of the leader? If so, he could satisfy him.

"Uh ... Megan ...suck me off" he had uttered, having chosen the first name that went through his head and pressed for more intimate contact on his cock.

The hot sheath of Leo’s mouth and the caress of his tongue on the thin and sensitive skin of his cock tip had driven Mikey crazy.

"Ah! Leo!” The false name having already flown through the window. Mikey couldn’t remember anything. Nothing mattered more than the present moment and the turtle between his legs.

Leo had admonished him not to make any noise and resumed to the hand job Mikey had to put his pillow over his head to stifle his loud moans. He didn’t know what was turning on him so much, making him all hot. The idea of the taboo? No, it wasn’t that. If it had been Raphael, desperate for sex or not, he would have struggled. He realized then that in some way what he had felt for Leo had always been murky. Respect, admiration ... had he already found his brother sexy? He had thought of those jade-colored thighs, perfectly muscular and had imagined spreading them. He had come at this moment, his toes curled under a cataclysmic orgasm and the pillow could barely cover his cry of pleasure while he spilled his seen on his brother’s clenched fist.

"It's our secret, Mikey. Don't talk to anyone about it,” Leo whispered after having stepped out the bed. “I hope to see you tomorrow at breakfast. Good night.”

When Mikey had lifted his head from under the pillow after his heartbeat came back to normal, the leader was gone and he hated himself to have let Leo gone without his own need being cared of.

It was only a postponement, Mikey had said, catching his breath, still amazed about the incredible intimate moment he shared with his eldest brother. Tomorrow night, it would be his turn to take care of Leo.

***

_Hi Clark,_

_I need to tell you what just happened. I was in the alley with you know, "He", and what happened that night ... He told me that there was no need to talk about this with you. The important thing was that I got better. I should rather talk about how I think I can improve my training performance. My lover (Clark! I can't believe I can say that, that I, Hamato Michelangelo, I have someone to give this name to, okay, we are still in the preliminaries, but still) spend a lot of time to train. Ninjutsu is an obsession with him and MANY other sports too! He's not like my brother Leo, for example. "He" does other things like basketball! He's crazy about basketball!_

_Leo wants me to talk about training, so there you go. The day started off pretty well. I got up early to make breakfast. I was looking forward to seeing Leo and talking to him, but Don was already drinking his coffee. So, I couldn't. Leo was as usual calm, sipping his tea and reading the newspaper. He greeted me as nothing happened at all. I started to take out the ingredients by announcing that I was going to make breakfast. I was a little disappointed because he had already eaten. I have to get up earlier tomorrow!_

_So, I lost interest in making breakfast._

_In training, I was paired with Donnie. That sucks, one because I didn't want him as a partner and because Donnie would make me look bad cause he doesn’t care about training. He does it because Leo would be on his shell otherwise, but he has already said that a big brain can do more damage than big muscles. He talked about Einstein, who invented the atomic bomb. I admit that was a good argument._

_It wasn’t only Don’s fault. I admit I was distracted. I had never noticed how Leo had beautiful muscles. I mean, I have nice muscles too, but hey, I don't have as good a view of mine. Especially since Donnie broke all the mirrors in the house the day April spat in his face. This is the only reason why I was so captivated by those of Leo._

_The bottom line is I think I could improve my training better if I was paired with Leo. Firstly, he is the best and if he is in front of me, I won’t keep looking aside!_

Mikey reread his entry again. Encouraged by what had happened twenty minutes earlier, he regretted not being able to write it, to relive the events a second time. But Leo had been clear, "No need to write down what's going on between us in your journal, Mikey. Admitting that you do, I don't think you can write the truth while hiding my identity, "he explained, seriously, as if Mikey didn't know that as soon as his back was turned, Leo would rush to read his diary, to reveal the secrets of Mikey's young soul.

The day had been delicious and hellish at the same time. He had been surprised to see Leonardo's face smooth at breakfast. He had greeted him with a friendly "Good morning, Mikey, happy to see you", but nothing more. Donnie then launched a sarcastic retort on Lazarus emerging from his tomb and Mikey was briefly disappointed. He had hoped to see Leo alone, talk to him the day before and who knows, get a kiss from the Fearless Leader like that in the kitchen, with the exciting risk of getting caught. But Donatello's presence made it impossible. _For the moment_ , Mikey had specified himself mentally. D would go back and sacrifice to the Technology Goddess anytime soon or jerk off to hentai, and he and Leo would be alone.

It hadn't turned out the way he wanted it to be. First, with training. Mikey wanted to team up with the leader. Leo had decided otherwise. He no longer counted the number of shots he had received, while, although he thought he was subtle about it, he kept watching the elder confront Raphael. Each war cry or panting breath distracted him far too much. He thought about the day before. Had he dreamed? Was Leo going to come back to his room tonight, to pet and kiss him? Would he have the opportunity to draw erotic sounds from his brother, even more than the ones he was pushing at the moment?

He ended up sending his nunchaku in his own face and Raph had laughed. Leo had then suspended the training.

In the showers, Mikey hadn't had to wring his neck too much. Leo had been his shower neighbor since childhood, while Don and Raph were at the opposite side. He rubbed absently, his head elsewhere, quite discreetly watching the leader. Had Leo, since childhood, developed a fraternal interest for him, Michelangelo? Has Leonardo been biting his sheets for a long time, restraining himself from going to slip between the sheets of his little brother? If so, well, he could have avoided this trouble and come to warm his bed, long before. Because, if Mikey had suspected it, he would have made a move long before.

He watched the water run down on the malachite-toned skin, following the sinuous curve of the well-defined muscles. Leo's head was bent backward, exposing his Adam's apple to the warm spray, his magnificent gray eyes, closed. It was rare to see such an utter expression of contentment on the leader features and Mikey decided he had something to do with.

Would Leo come tonight? The leader did not seem any different from the other days, except that, unlike the last days, he was no longer continually asking him if he was fine.

What should he do if Leo doesn't come? Should he go join him? Should Mikey take the lead? Yesterday, the leader had been turned on by what had happened between them, Mikey was quite positive about it. Did Leo jerk off in his room after that? The idea of his brother, so serious, wiggling his expert wrist on his own member, started a fire in Michelangelo's lower abdomen.

He would die to see it and better yet, do it himself, he thought, licking his lips. He was starting to have a boner and, slightly embarrassed, his first thought had been to turn the shower so that the water became cold, but curious, he wanted to take a look at the turtle next to him.

Leonardo, somewhere during his reflections, had left the shower.

The leader then had been difficult to approach. Mikey couldn't say that Leo was deliberately elusive. His routine was much the same as the one he had followed since Splinter's departure. Get up. Tea, breakfast, meditation.Sparring practice. Shower. Meditation. Lunch. Philosophy study. Visit the garage to make sure Raphael was fine. Ninjutsu training. Shower. Cleaning of his room. Visit the lab to make sure Donnie was having dinner. Strategy study. Tai Chi. Join his brothers for a family activity where Leo's body was there but not his mind. And finally, a tea if they went on patrol or a herbal tea and he put all the brothers to bed. He ended with a meditation session then reading some Japanese haiku book before sleeping.

No wonder that with such a schedule, the Hamato brothers had all taken it for granted that the leader had thought neither of love nor of sex. Well not since the weird Karai’s episode. Mikey didn't even want to think about it.

Leo was either locked in his room or with at least one of their brothers. The only difference was that Leo sometimes came gently to ask him if he had vegetables to peel or chop. Leo has a good wrist; Mikey knew it from first-hand knowledge, now.

Today, unfortunately, Leonardo didn’t offer his help. Did the leader regret what had happened between them? It was quite possible, Michelangelo had judged. His brother tended to overthink and feel guilty. But as soon as he had the opportunity, Mikey would explain to him he had nothing to be over-concerned about It was almost 10 pm when Leo got up.

"Good night. I'm going to bed.”

Mikey immediately dropped his joystick. Anyway, he couldn't complete his mission at Halo tonight.

"Me too," he said, "I want to have sweet dreams like yesterday."

Gray eyes had flown towards him, getting the hint. Mikey had been unsubtle on purpose and had been trying all day to confront Leonardo in a not too aggressive way. For three hours, he had been preparing this sentence.

Leo nodded slightly. Was in acceptance? In his room, Mikey had waited with a racing heart. Damn Raph wasn’t sleeping yet. He could hear the sounds of machine guns and explosions from the action film he was watching. Usually, Mikey would have insisted on watching him with Raph, drooling over the heroine, but tonight, there was better than any actress.

Every cell in his body was consumed in waiting until he blinked. A moment later, a shadow was leaning over him, his lips brushing against his.

"Mikey, do you need me tonight?" Leo asked in a low voice.

Mikey hadn't wasted time on something as energy-consuming as speaking words. He had pulled the leader's head toward him and crushed his lips.

The atmosphere quickly heated up. They were pressed against each other, as their tongues explored the other mouth. Mikey felt the swollen cock of his brother against him. They were taking their time more than the day before. The day before, it had taken less than ten minutes and Leo, if he had wanted, could have finished it as efficiently and quickly as the day before. But, like him, Leo seemed to want to enjoy it more. 

“Do it with your mouth, again,” Mikey begged and thrilled, he realized his brother was obeying. The shift in power and the fact Leo was damn too skilled for his own good with this tongue of his undone Mikey again too quickly and dazed, he watched as the eldest swallowed it off dutifully.

“Don’t forget Mikey. It’s a secret,” Leo told him again. “Please be more discreet about it.”

Mikey had enjoyed the experience far too much to upset Leo.

"You ... you don't want me to do it to you?" He had asked. He had slipped his hand along Leo's chest and had felt the bump made by a hard cock. The leader was turned on by what he had just done, Mikey realized with excitement. Leo, as he had suspected, was made of a much softer steel than what his other brothers suspected.

"No, I'll take care of it myself, in my room. Good night, Mikey. I hope to see you tomorrow, smiling, at breakfast,” Leo had murmured again, before closing the door, not giving the youngest time to recover and insist for Leo to stay longer for Mikey to touch him.

Mikey fell back on the pillow, pinching himself to make sure he hadn't dreamed. Exalted, he tells himself that Leonardo lived with him 24 hours a day, 7 days a week and therefore, that it was really better than a mere human. Mikey wouldn't have to wait for the night to see his big brother. He just had to cross a hall. He had touched brushed his lips, remembering the kiss exchanged. Never had he felt such well-being. He had mentally replayed the scene over and over and finally fell asleep.

_Dear Clark,_

_Usually, I write to you the night before going to bed, but I need to get it out of my chest now._

_I will try to be more specific in what I entrust to you. I think there are things you don't understand._

_To improve at the Dojo, I must be paired with Leo! Yesterday Leo was with Raph. Today, he started with Donnie. Why? Okay, you're gonna tell me, like Leo said it's my turn tomorrow, but I don't know, Clark. Leo didn't have to lay on him that long, either Donnie doesn't need his hand to get up!_

_I'm a little on edge, Clark because Leo is avoiding me and I don't understand why! I mean, yesterday he swallowed (several words crossed out) and the next day, in the shower, while I was looking at him because I have never looked at his ~~cock,~~ knee, he glared at me; "Do you need something, Mikey?" " _

_I wanted to joke a seductive look, but he didn't like it. He got out of the shower, without answering me._

_It made me furious. But hey, since it's a brand new thing, I don't want to ruin it by showing too much impatience. I didn't go to the Fearless Leader to ask for an explanation right away. I waited for a good twenty minutes._

_I went to knock on his door, but he told me he was busy. So, I explained that in this case, I will be in my room to write in my diary, if he was looking for me. And there you go._

Mikey had a disappointing morning and disappointment had always been a problematic emotion for him. When he got up, really early, to surprise Leo, he was in a good mood. He kept thinking back to his first blowjob, how the sensation had been intense. He had spent the night having very detailed erotic dreams, but this time, his fantasies were no longer about ordinary strangers, but his brother. He regretted not having been able to take a look at Leo’s athletic body because of the darkness. He had risen with this obsession: to detail the body of his brother, naked. But that wasn’t all. He wanted to give equal pleasure to Leo, to the one he had received from and to see his features contort under the effect of the climax that he, Mikey, would lavish on him. He couldn’t wait until the evening. Of course, in the kitchen, at 5:30 in the morning, they could not go far, but he wanted to see immediately the face of his brother when he kissed and caressed him. He could not wait and it was with wings that he had rushed into the kitchen.

But Leo wasn’t there.

An authoritative voice led him to where the leader in blue was.

Leo was in the Dojo with Raphael. Mikey did not know what his brother in red had done for Leo's fury and that mind-blowing number of backflips in punishment. But that was not what mattered. Mikey had waited, wisely, a quarter of an hour, at the entrance, before Leonardo deigned to notice his presence.

"Can I help you, Michelangelo? "

The "Michelangelo", so formal and spoken almost harshly, had destabilized him a little. After all, he and Leo had become intimate, right?

"Uh, I wanted to know what you wanted for breakfast?” Mikey had blurted out, taken aback by Leo’s cold attitude.

"No need to go to the trouble. I already ate. And Raph won’t eat. You can always ask Donnie, but with today's training, I advise you not to make your stomach heavy,” Leo had declared icily.

Mikey knew that the leader was angry with Raph, not against him, but it didn’t change anything. He had been hurt.

He had eaten his Nutella with a spoon for breakfast, sullen, stopping only when nausea took hold of him. Then he told himself that during the practice he would get a chance to be close to Leonardo, without raising suspicion.

But in training, things did not improve.

Leo had claimed that he didn't want to do Raph the honor of fighting with him and chose Donnie. Mikey had been dangerously irritated. Why did the leader choose Donnie and give him Raph as a partner?

His bad mood allowed him to fight with a little more conviction than usual. He was in good shape when he saw Don, knocked down by Leo. A strange feeling had invaded him at the sight and Mikey had turned pale to the point that Raphael's eyes had widened in surprise.

The rest of the training was a pair against the other. So Leo and Don against Raph and Mikey.

Mikey had objected, and all his frustration accumulated since the morning had spilled.

"Why are you avoiding me, Leo? It’s been ages since we teamed up!” he had yelled, not giving a shit about throwing a tantrum over such a silly thing. He felt raw and needed to bubble out his emotions.

"Michelangelo. I’m not avoiding you. If you've isolated yourself from the world for weeks, it's not my fault. Be my partner, if you absolutely want it,” the leader yielded with such detachment Mikey didn’t feel like he even got his point across, and he didn’t even accept the offer. Maybe if they sparred against each other, he could grope Leo more.

Mikey had been worse than distracted. Every move he made was an attempt to hit the leader, not to hit or deflect one, but to provoke a reaction: trouble, complicity, emotion, shit! There was nothing to do. Leo’s steel couldn’t bend.

Leo seemed to notice only the inefficiencies of his maneuvers in combat.

"Focus, Mikey! "

The sweat, the smell, the intense focus of the leader just reminded Mikey that he had held the Dojo God in his bed the night before.

It had calmed Mikey, but hardly. His excitement of the nightly caresses exchanged had faded. He didn’t dare upset or anger his brother by asking straightforwardly, but on the other hand, many question marks began to line up in his head. Too many that Mikey wisely waited till night to express them.

In the shower, he couldn’t help it. Curious, he had wanted to take a look to see his brother’s cock, to give even more detail to his nighttime fantasies.

He had barely glimpsed the long and purple sex when the sharp tone of the leader had made him jump.

"Do you need something, Mikey? "

Mikey decided it was time to make a move and thought it was fitting to smirk at the leader, a grin meaning, "Yes, I need something." to express his desire.

The young leader's face remained expressionless, but he immediately cut off the water from his shower, leaving Mikey alone, ulcerated. What the actual fuck? They were alone! Leo had a split personality disorder? Was he paranoid that if he paid too much attention to Mikey, their brothers would discover the secret? There was even a moment when he wondered if he was dreaming? Or, was Leo a sleepwalker?

He had to know what the meaning of this was for Leonardo and how it was supposed to make Mikey feel better and loved to not give him any kind of intimacy or favored treatment he craved. He had knocked at Leo’s door but the leader was “busy.” So Mikey had decided to use his diary as a messenger, but he wasn’t sure Leo took the bait.

In the evening, Mikey waited resolutely for Leo. He didn't know if he would show up or not. He had made a plan, almost worthy of the Fearless Leader himself.

He had stuffed his bed, to simulate a sleeping body, and he had waited hidden behind his door for nearly three hours without making any noise.

Leo had entered and was deceived by the darkness. He had fallen into Michelangelo's trap.

Mikey grabbed Leo by the waist and pulled him onto the bed. Mikey would have been proud of having fooled the Fearless leader at another time, but he was too much in a frenzy to touch his brother's body after craving it all day.

Leo had tried to resist. But, forced to remain discreet, and having only caresses to push away, he had stopped struggling.

"Mikey! What does this mean?” the leader had whispered. “I’m only here to tell you to be more subtle. I don’t want Raph and Donnie to find out what I did with you!”

Mikey wiped away Leo’s worries with a bright smile. Anyway, one day or another, Raph and Donnie would find out and would probably be cool with it, if Mikey and Leo were happy together being lovers.

"Tonight, it's your turn, Leo. I want to touch you, to taste you. "

Leo had again objected:

"It’s not about me, Mikey, I don’t need anything. It’s about you."

"That's exactly what I want. I wanted and needed you all day, there.”

Overcome by this argument, the leader had calmed down, then panicked again when Mikey had lit the neon of his empty aquarium, which served him both as a night light and a greenhouse.

"Mikey! What are you doing? Turn the light off immediately!" he hissed nervously.

"I want to see you, Leo."

He had placed a soothing hand on his brother's chest, so that he lay on his shell.

"Let me do it, Leo. I really want to touch you. I'm not a selfish bastard. I want to know what it is to give pleasure to someone. Not just receiving it.”

With the back of his hand, he stroked the inside of Leo’s thigh, and he noticed the shiver of pleasure that passed through the leader. He leaned over and initiated the kiss while searching for his brother’s girth. The heavy cock fell into his hand like a ripe fruit.

Mikey put it in his mouth, tasting Leo’s intimate spicy taste and he felt it harden in his mouth. Mikey looked up, staring at his brother, now flushed and sweating, his face twisted in anticipation. Nothing like the iron man he was in the Dojo. Mikey wet Leo’s hole his tongue, penetrating a little, spreading the edges of the ring of muscle. He then sucked his own finger, twisting his tongue around, to carefully breach him and Leo had stretched his body like a bow with a cry of pleasure.

"Leo ... if you could see yourself! You are so hot!" Mikey exclaimed, trying to get eye contact to see if his brother was as turned on as him.

Leonardo asked Mikey again to give him another name, as he had again asked him to turn off the light, but Mikey couldn’t hold the false name principle for more than a moment. The "Leo" flowed from his mouth with unquenchable naturalness. It wasn't enough. He wanted to feel another body connected with his. He needed this to be finally a damn adult as the others were. But it wasn't only about recognition. He wanted this, he wanted Leo, to have more of him, to devour him, but Mikey had to ask for consent. He wasn't a mindless animal like Raph. 

"I want to go further ... to make love. Do you?" he had asked his voice strained with feelings and how solemn his words sounded for him.

Leo hesitated, claiming it was an essential act in life and was given only once. Maybe Mikey wanted to keep himself for another person, someone he would really be in love with.

Mikey had not said anything yet, pondering seriously for once. His feelings were vague. Leo had always been special to him. Was he special-special? Was Mikey in love because he only liked the exchanged pleasure? He had realized that he had become a little jealous of the attention that the leader could bring to his other brothers, but did that mean anything? He found Leonardo VERY attractive suddenly, but was it only because he was the one who initiated him to sexuality?

He thought about it and decided that the experience of having his brother hold him in his arms, only occupied with him, the giver of his pleasure and his desires was the more exhilarating experience of his lifetime. He had no desire for any other partner and didn’t know anybody more deserving than Leonardo himself. As far as Mikey was concerned, it was love, but he was too uneasy to say it after such a cold day from Leo and without having proved himself.

“I want you,” he said instead. “I want you over anybody else. Who else could be the right person? Who would you let near the lair enough to be the right person for me? The more the days pass, the more we are secluded. We only go out twice a week, now. A patrol and the errands, period. The only people I see up close are the Foots. Do you want me to have a love affair with a Foot clan soldier?”

Leo asked again if it was important to Mikey and if that would be enough to make him happy. With sincerity, Mikey replied by the affirmative. Genuinely, he thought there was nothing he wanted to experience love than feeling to be one with someone else.

The leader had been gentle and attentive, as usual. He had asked Michelangelo's permission one last time, because of course, Leo's first instinct was to top. Even if it wasn't Mikey's first pick to bottom, he was far too excited to protest. Mikey was shaking with nerves and was about to lose it and yell a “do me, already.” Leo had coated his cock with lube and Mikey's entrance too after having worked him up with his tongue and fingers and had sunk without haste, but determination.

Mikey suddenly felt aware of every cell in his body, which seemed to panic. Yet his mind was not scared. It was what he wanted, he realized. What he had made him so unhappy and agitated in the past few months. Not just sex, no. In his eyes, Leo had a sparkle that was quenching Mikey's thirsty soul. It was love, Mikey decided, a love he was really willing to give back. 

He wanted Leonardo but it wasn't a new fancy. That it all started on his birthday had a meaning. The leader had a speech about the fact that, since Splinter hadn't returned, he was going to take over and Mikey found him heroic and ... something else. He hadn't understood what at the time, but he knew it: he had found his brother, handsome.

The experience of having his brother holding him in his arms solely occupied with him, his pleasure and his desires, had quickly brought Mikey to orgasm.

He wanted to give Leonardo such pleasure in return, but not only for reciprocity. By touching his dilated anus, which by spasms, let out the thick semen of his brother, he had what they could call an epiphany: Leo had claimed him. He had left an indelible mark on him. Whatever Mikey did, no matter if he had another lover, Leo would have been the first.

He wanted to be just as important to his brother. The idea made him shiver with desire. Taking the leader, making him lose his mind while he was lost in his body, appeared to him very appealing.

He had expressed this desire and prevented the leader to leave. Leo had been reluctant. Unable to convince him with words, Mikey had caressed the leader, dripping with excitement again, coaxing Leo by feeling him up until they were both hard again.

He was so sure of him. He loved Leo. The leader had nodded his consent with a shaky, cute sigh, spreading his gorgeous thighs as Mikey had fantasized about. Michelangelo had wanted to make love with their legs entwined, his face close of Leo’s, jerking him off in synch with his thrusts. Leo’s core, hot as coal and soft as silk was almost crushing his dick and the idea that he was Leo’s first had driven Mikey to a climax very quick.

Afterward, Leo stayed mute a moment, before using a towel near, that he drenched with some water in a bottle and Mikey looked at him, wiping away Mikey’s thick seed from his thighs, lost in his thought.

He had crossed a line. He had marked his brother unalterably. Even though Mikey does, it does not matter if they ever had another lover, they would have been the first to each other. Both of them had lost their virginity to each other and Mikey guessed it was the end of the road toward happiness.

“I think by now you must feel better,” Leo told in a low voice, perhaps mistaking Mikey’s grin. “We won’t go further. Now, please eat like you used to before this unfortunate incident.” The voice was sweet, but the words were hurting Mikey more surely than Leo’s sword would. “I have no need for a sex partner, but I miss my cheerful little brother. You will get through the pain you felt that night. The pain won’t last forever and that girl isn’t worth your tears. Don’t forget to never speak about what we did. It’s never happened.”

Without waiting for an answer, Leo left, leaving Mikey soul-crushed after a quick peck on the forehead.

Leonardo, apart from a deep brotherly affection, felt nothing for him. From the beginning, in the background, he provided Mikey with sex, like Prozac to help him get through his depression. He had whored himself because he couldn’t afford a psychiatrist.

With all this ancient wisdom, Leo didn’t realize that being rejected by his own brother after a pity-fuck was more hurtful than a random girl disgusted by him.

But why was he surprised, he wondered, with anger’s tear.

Leo only knows about katana blade maintenance and bushido. But Mikey wasn’t the type of guy to drop it. Leo never resisted him too long.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Art by Sherenelle.

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_December 7_   
_Dear Clark,_

_I’m confused and lost. Perhaps, I need to see Donatello. The guy’s been heartless since the day April broke the only one he had, but he’s still the smartest guy I know. I mean, I think, well, I’m sure I’m in love. I really do. But I don’t know what to do with my feelings. I don’t want Leo to learn about it by sneaking in my room and read you, so I’m hiding you in my obi. If Leo asks a question about not finding my diary anymore, he would have to give me an answer, first. I don’t get him at all, Clark, but it’s not enough for me to drop it._

_After what Leo told me, I was mad and upset. To get rejected like that hurt. Also, to resume to jerk off after having tasted the real thing was a huge turn-off. Then, I tried to see the bright side. Leo wasn’t ‘breaking up’ with me. Leo couldn’t run anywhere, to find another fuck buddy. He wasn’t in love with someone else. Leo wasn’t kicking me out of his life; he just wanted to resume for us to be bros. I wondered a great deal of time why that’s so. Leo had felt good with me. It was obvious he had. So, what could be his reason? After having replayed the last days in my mind, I think I got it._

_If he was calling the whole thing off, it was because I had been greedy. I should not have asked Leo to bottom. I’m sure as proud as he is, this is what had bothered him, that I saw this cute side of his, not leader-like at all. Maybe he wasn’t ready for sex all the way and we should have stayed on a hand-job basis much longer. If I had been more patient and more strategic, I could have brought Leo to beg me for this maybe, but damn, it’s too late now. He is pissed. I think Don and Raph’s opinions matter to him. Of course, our life is hard and we only have each other, so I could understand he doesn’t want to disturb our family, but I know Don and Raph._

_I got it and so, me too, I played lowkey the whole day. I had been extra sure to try to please without overdoing it. Leo was his usual self, except he didn’t perform as he does typically during his sparring match. Raph had teased him about he was as bad as me and I could tell Leo was mad. Leo couldn’t explain it was because he was feeling sore from having being fucked senseless. I know Leo was in pain because my lower back was throbbing and well, Leo had been softer on me than I had been for him, so no wonder he was all stiff despite he tried to walk naturally. He was still doing his best and well, was breathtaking. It’s weird how I didn’t notice it before._

_At the meals, he was conscientious to pay me attention equally to Don and Raph. It’s like he was taking mental note of how many sentences he addressed to each of us. He was doing eye contact, without glaring neither blushing. In fact, he was so making sure we could see any emotion out of the ordinary, that they expressed nothing at all. It feels like he had painted eyes like an action figure and I wondered if it was new. Was I just more aware than before of him?_

_At night, Leo didn’t come to see me. I had expected such, but it was still upsetting. It wasn’t the no sex part that bothered me the most, but to be at odds with a brother I always get along with the best. I had hesitated a moment, then I decided I wouldn’t be able to sleep, anyway. My mind was racing with questions, serious ones. Questions that right now, a few hours after, I still don’t have an answer to. So, instead of driving myself crazy with it, I told myself: fuck it._

_It was the right moment; Raph had got permission to wander topside. Raph is the only one Leo allows to do so. He said Raphael’s mood is volatile and if Raphael is about to lose it, it would be better outside our home. Master Splinter would have called this irresponsible from Leo to let the poor citizens dealt with the family burden, but I won’t call Leo off for that either Don, but it’s not the point._

_Raph’s room was the one next to Leo’s. Don was very likely to beat off his monkey in his lab or create some “security device” that could slice a man in a blink. So, the coast was clear for me to pay a visit to Leo without him being over-concerned we got walked on._

_I sneaked out of my room in a total ninja way to Leo’s. As I was supposing, his door wasn’t even locked. It would have been pointless in a ninja room; we are mastering the art to pick a lock._

_Leo wasn’t sleeping or he is a very light sleeper. He sat upright in his bed when I pushed open the door._

_“Mikey! What are you doing?” Leo hissed in a low voice.” Go back to your room!”_

_It’s the moment I realized that the questioning and wondering had weighed so much on my mind, I didn’t even prepare anything to say. In the family, we split in half: the ones who think a lot before acting and the ones who did the other way around. The saying about opposites attracts each other makes sense, now. Anyway, I still looked like a dumbass, speechless into Leo’s room at midnight._

_“Does something happen to Raph?” Leo asked, now worried I hadn’t spoken yet and he turned on the light on his bed table to probably read on my features what the fuck was happening. He is such a worrywart. I was still bewildered he didn’t guess right away I was there to have sex. Well, it wasn’t my reason, but…_

* * *

Mikey threw away his pen, frustrated, thinking back of what had occurred a few hours earlier. Leo, with his gleaming eyes full of concern, had got up of his bed and Mikey had been struck by desire and a need to comfort his brother in the way he just discovered. Mikey had managed to hold it back, because it was uncalled for. He was on a mission for fuck sake, probably the most critical of his life. He had to convince Leo, the more pig-headed of their stubborn family, to not call it quit between them. 

“Raph is fine, well, I guess. He is all grown-up! I’m here to talk about us,” Mikey said. “I was feeling lonely in my bed and I guess you do, too. Raph is out and Don is busy. We could enjoy ourselves instead of brooding in our room.”

Leo’s face had changed while he was speaking and the sight he got on the leader’s feature wasn’t encouraging a bit. 

“I told you it was over. You told me you will be happy with that! Brothers don’t do that! I crossed the boundaries once because…”

Mikey had walked the distance and put his hand on Leo’s crotch.

“Mikey!” Leo snarled, slapping the hand away, but it was like all of a sudden, Mikey’s years of training were paying off and with a sharp move, he made his older brother fall on his bed and for the first time of his life he succeeded into using pressure point. This spot behind his knee would freeze Leo’s legs for three minutes, but it would be enough to make his point across, Mikey decided and he pinned his brother’s wrists to not get punched.

“Mikey,” Leo said again, but this time around, his voice was different, sounding much more vulnerable. He was surprised Mikey got the upper hand for once, but the nunchuker decided he would boast about how awesome he was another day.

“Don’t tell me it wasn’t feeling good? Don’t tell me after having tried this out with me, you want to go back to a monk freak life? Don’t you…” Mikey crushed his lips on Leo’s to give more weight to his point. The kiss took an even better flavor when he felt Leo starting to follow the lead of his lips and Mikey rubbed his crotch against his brother’s bony lower plate… It was turning steamy again, even if having sex wasn’t in Mikey’s plan at first. 

_...But Raph arrived bellowing Leo’s name and I think, like in the movies if Leo could have thrown me out the window, to hide that he had a lover, he would have done it. The paralysis was over and he threw me on the ground. He was incensed and I knew better than stay there. I managed to crawl back to my room._

_I heard Raph rambling about the Foot and Master Splinter, but didn’t pay any attention._

_I can’t sleep ..._

_I read my first entries. From my 16th birthday to today, I am no longer the same. Something has changed, radically and I don’t know how to live with it. I saw a documentary about victims who suffered a post-traumatic shock. Okay, I know, I just got to get sex, I know it’s the same, but still, I feel like now I couldn’t even fake to be happy anymore. It’s not a fancy. I just don’t want my life to be a dead end. Leo couldn’t be happy alone; would he not be better with a lover by his side? If Don and Raph could be attracted to each other, it would be nice. I’m sure they could heal the wound Casey and April gave them. The more I think about it, the more I’m sure it’s the solution to get some happiness._

_Now, I’m tired. I will try to sleep for at least one hour to be able to face Leo tomorrow._

* * *

_Clark,_

_This secret is stifling me and I decided I would spill my guts to Leo. It was very early and I thought-again-it was a good moment._

_I got up. Leo was in the kitchen making plans about the Foot clan. He barely raised his head when I told him I wanted to talk with him._

_He plainly dismissed what I just said and told me to wake Raph and Don as I was nothing more than his errand boy._

_“Not before we talk about us!” I said._

_His eyes flickered toward me. He hadn’t slept at all, I could tell by the dark circle around his grey eyes under the blue mask._

_“If you mean by about us what I did with you and your goal is to coax me to continue, there no need to talk. The answer is no.”Don't even try to enter my bedroom at night again."_

_How could he decide this all by himself? Could he at least let me talk about how I feel? I could help it, I hit the table with my palm._

_“Would you not listen to me before?” I shouted, probably livid, but it didn’t seem to impress Leonardo, who coldly stared at me, his arms folded as I was a child throwing a tantrum at the candy store. He looked like a judgemental statue and I even wondered one moment if I wasn't delusional. How this guy could moan and got such arousing bedroom eyes when he was so goop at glaring. Was this huge personality gap that was making him now so attractive that I could think of anything else?_

_“Are you done acting like a child?” he told me as I guessed he would. “Your whole life, I indulged you in any of your fancy and whim, but my body is over limit. I did once. You get to not die like a virgin; as you cried you would and now you can't forget about those mean girls.”_

_I retorted he was the one treating me like a child and that I wasn’t aiming at his body, there were plenty other things I wanted before getting at that, despite what he could believe and that those girls were forgotten for a while, but he interrupted me._

_“I said no.” Leo’s icy tone made my heart ache like frostbite. “I know you, Mikey. I know how you sneak your way by never dropping it,” Leo growled. “But I have more serious stuff to deal with, like our father! Stop being selfish for once and go wake up Donnie and Raph!”_

_I said nothing or maybe I called him a jerk. I’m not sure. I certainly did mentally. I left the kitchen and went to get the others._

_I sat there while Leo discussed strategy and I realized that even if Leo was a colossal jerk and Leo had treated me like shit the last two days, my heart was still pounding faster every time I gazed at him. When he is focused and serious like that, I feel butterflies in my stomach. I wish he could look at me like he looks at this New York map, his gray-steel eyes zeroed on, his brow furrowed in concentration and the tension in his muscular shoulders... I'm in deep, man._

_I invented a reason to follow Don to the laboratory when the meeting was over. Leo was watching me nervously. But not as I would have liked: he watched me with worries._

_I didn’t snitch to Don what Leo and I did. I simply asked the question torturing me. If someone knows about unrequited love, it's Donnie. How long he had admired April from afar until he made a move and wreck everything? But now Donnie was kind of fine, or well, so I supposed._

_“Don, when we are in love with a person and that this one doesn’t love you, how long does it hurt? How long before you move over?"_

_I’m not telling you Donnie’s answer, Clark. It's too depressing. And I’m too depressed to write it down because then, I would turn trillionfold more depressed. In Deadpool, the hero and his girlfriend have sex to feel good at first, but end deeply in love, unable to live without each other, despite Deadpool defigured face. But it’s just a movie. No happy end for the real-life monster._

* * *

Mikey didn’t get any other opportunity to talk with Leo. He was busy planning an attack against the Foot. Mikey was on laundry duty and he picked up one of Leo’s blue bandana for his spank bank. If he couldn’t get the real thing or some loving, he could still give himself some gratification.

His wrist and his cock hurt when he finally managed to achieve a pale imitation of orgasm. It was nothing at all like he had felt the night with Leonardo. Staring at the ceiling, he tried to think about a way to get Leo to hear him out. His error was that he had acted without being prepared. He should have known better after years following his older brother’s lead that it was a bad idea to come in a battle unguarded.

Leo spent the day strategizing and meditating and Mikey decided it would be untimely to disturb him. 

In the evening, when he was still lying down, the blue bandana on his face, there was a knock on his door. Quickly, he stuffed the tainted bandana into his obi. 

“Mikey, move your ass, we’re going patrolling.”

Of course, Leo acknowledged his existence but for a fighting purpose. They were still going to run in search of the Foots to get intel about Master Splinter’s location. Mikey wasn’t feeling to play soldier but still followed. The vendetta was Splinter’s, not theirs and Mikey wasn’t eager that much for the Sensei to return if that’s mean Leo would be even less eager to commit into a relationship. In the last months, he was there, Master Splinter was losing his mind. It was normal, Donatello had stated. If Master Splinter was still human, he would be more than 100 years old and living in the sewers made your mind age faster. From severe but fair, he was turning harsh and Mikey kind of hoped Master Splinter just died peacefully in his sleep or something. But of course, Leonardo couldn’t drop it. Even if he was dead, they must give him proper funerals. 

Donnie had tried to make the leader understand that the afterlife wasn’t for real and so, they shouldn’t endanger themselves for some bones. Leo had been displeased and it was an understatement. Raph had agreed with Leo, but not out of idealism. Only to blow off some steam. 

No one had asked for Michelangelo’s opinion like he wasn’t even there. It didn’t prevent him from complaining about he wanted to get home, already. It was cold outside December. He’d probably already asked too many times why they were freezing their asses off again.  
“Mikey, the Foots probably have Master Splinter. I’ve been telling you that 100 times already,” Leo muttered, exasperated.

“It’s not what Raph had reported.” Without paying too much attention to what Raphael had explained to Leo after having interrupted them, Mikey had got enough to know Raph didn’t say anything thing as positive. “He only said they had a new weapon against us.”

“How could you know since because you were sleeping, Mikey,” Leo cut, peremptory, although the leader knew that Mikey was VERY awake when Raph came back.

The youngest grumbled about he knew enough to said it was a waste of time and indeed, he would rather be sleeping. He yawned. The past sleepless night was reaching at him.

“You don’t want to find Master Splinter?”

The truth was, no, but Mikey was not crazy enough to throw this truth in the face of his brother.

“I mean there are probably other solutions than fighting the Foot ... Donnie can find a way to hack them. It’s a more peaceful solution. Make love, not war, it’s a great motto,” he replied.

His response seemed to offend the leader.

“Don, Raph, I want you at this intersection. Mikey and I are going to this one. We’re meeting here, “he explained, pointing to a place that Mikey didn’t even look at” in two hours. “

Mikey’s heart was racing. He didn’t need to listen to the plan, because he was with the Master of the Plan. Leo had chosen it. They would be alone for two hours ... Promising, Mikey thought.

But he quickly disenchanted. Leo, once at his post, didn’t have the mind to romance, not even a for a little chat. He was eerily silent.

“I’m cold,” Mikey whined. He knew he sounded childish, but having cold and being hungry were two topics he never was able to shush about. 

“I understood the first thirty times,” the leader snapped. “Crouch down and blow in your hands.”

“I prefer another way to keep myself warm,” the youngest replied smoothly. He had decided to stop trying to be subtle. At least he wanted Leo to admit that he wanted something similar to his and that he compromised a minimum. The last hour, he had followed Leo, watching him and filling his mind with positive ideas. Leo wasn’t the type of guy to sleep with anybody, even out of pity. Besides, Leo was the one having made the first move. If the leader had gone so damn far to “heal” Mikey, it was probably because it wasn’t repelling to him to touch Mikey this way. If that’s so, there was hope.  
  
He was tired to be the one feeling so profoundly in the last weeks. Could he be the only one who wasn’t blind about how crossing these brother boundaries could solve many of their personal issues? He had to be wrong and Leo had to at least have a slight attraction for him, right? He was perhaps proud or shy? Maybe it was the incest thing that was bothering him?

Leo glared at him:

“Mikey. We are on a mission, so be serious. But even if we were at home,” he specified, “It’s over. You got what you wanted and continuing would only compromise us. You act with no discretion and…”

“I love you,” Mikey choked out. The words escaped even faster than he had expected. Damn, he didn’t want to look pathetic so quickly, but it’s like he didn’t have the willpower to try to control himself. Anyway, Leo seems to have the wrong idea Mikey wanted sex and that’s all. He needed to clear this misunderstanding. Mikey wanted to get the sexual aspect of the relationship, but he still preferred a loving relationship with only kisses and cuddles to pity-fuck. 

Leo looked at him, dazed and incredulous, at this impromptu statement, then he frowned, angry.

“You don’t love me.” Leo locked eyes with him, an unreadable expression on his features. You love what I do to you, the sensation. I’m your flavor of the month, Mikey. Nothing more! But now you have to resume to your life without it. It has become too dangerous and if you start to get confused in your feelings ...” he trailed off, looking away with a hint of uneasiness.

“I’m not confused. I love you. I’ve been thinking about nothing else the past few days,” protested Mikey, not noticing the ridiculousness of his sentence.

Leo laughed nervously.

“I believe that a few days old passion takes even less time to fade out. Pull yourself together, Mikey. If you continue to act like that, Don and Raph will become suspicious.”  
  
“So what?” Mikey retorted. “D and Raph don’t mind whatever we did. Who says they don’t fuck together already?”

Leo cast on him a shocked look.

“First, I would ask you to watch your language. Two, Don and Raph don’t do anything you imply. You’re losing your mind, my poor Mikey.” The leader sighed. “It is my fault. It was a bad idea.”

“So, for you, us, it was just an idea? A bad one, even more? Mikey asked, irritated. "And now you will trow yourself a pity-party?"

Leo shook his head, but replied gently, seeing his little brother was angry.

“I'm not. When I said it's my fault, you can't deny it. And Mikey, there no “us.” The only us is you, Don, Raph and me. Our clan, united by strong fraternal ties.” The leader’s tone was exalted, carried away by his desire to convince his little brother. “Our brotherly bound is what makes us solid and powerful!”

Leo raved again and again about his favorite topic: Family, clan, vendetta, but Mikey didn’t pay any attention. He had heard about this thousand times already. Maybe Raph had been right when he had said Leo didn’t have a dick. But it wasn’t about if Leo could get horny or not. Could he have feelings? Could he get down of his high horse and just live and love like a mere person?

“...you will get to get older and understand than what you feeling right now it’s not love. I’m just an easy opportunity to get pleasant sensations. I understand; it does feel good, but you can’t mistake feeling good and be in love. You want to go with the flow, but love is a serious matter that you are too young to fully grasp. Besides, romantic feelings aren't something we should be concerned about. We're ninjas.”

“So you don’t love me?” Needless to answer, it’s purely rhetorical,” Mikey said coldly. Even if Leo had admitted it feels good, he doesn’t feel for him like a victory at all. “Besides, you weren’t there when I hatched, to mark it on a calendar. There no evidence I’m younger than you. I also never saw pinned on your bedroom wall your degree in Psychology neither the one about Love counseling. And when our father decided for us we will be ninja, I never made a celibacy oath.”

Leo frowned. Never his eldest position had been so straightforwardly doubted and being talking back, by Mikey from all people wasn't something he was used at. 

“Mikey, you sound like Donnie and I don’t think I’ve ever heard anything more disturbing,” the leader tried to joke, but his agitation was decipherable. "Sarcasm doesn't suit you."

“Oh, why because suddenly I can say something other than Dude, Bro, Cowabunga, and Booyakasha?"Mikey stretched a sneer very uncharacteristic. "And don't dare to belittle my feeling or tell me that I'm not allowed to have them! You treat me like an unreasonable child, but it's about time you wake up! Yes, not too long ago, I was happy eating gummies and playing video games," he admitted. "Because I didn't see any other way to try to be content being a freak living in the sewers! But I grew older, Leo and my interests have changed. You will have to realize it one day! And you know what, bro?” Michelangelo snickered. With a move so swift, even the great Leonardo didn't see it coming, Mikey yanked Leo's bandana tail to crush their lips together. The kiss was burning, but lasted a few seconds. Mikey was the one who breaks it. Leo's stunned and flushed face was a treat, but Mikey was still too incensed. “My interests don’t include freezing my ass for your fight. I'm off. I will be back when you will look at me like your equal and not like a brat.”

Without listening to Leonardo, who called him explaining that of course, he loved him, as his precious brother and they will talk about it later, Mikey ran away. He was not the strongest nor the most intelligent, but he was fast. Especially when he didn’t want to be caught.

His first idea was to never get back. He wasn't fooled a bit by Leo's promise about 'to talk about it.' Leo would just repeat the same thing about he had been wrong to be with him that way, ask for forgiveness and allow him to binge eat ice cream. Just the idea of it makes him want to howl. Mikey can't come back in these conditions. He could live on his own for a while and then, maybe Leo would regret him and realize that he missed him?

Mikey was running full South for about forty minutes. He had the time to calm down and realize he was still cold. Should he return? If he did, would Leo take him seriously? He regretted his violent reaction. Leo didn’t like rebellion, even less if it was about his quest to find Master Splinter. But Mikey had suffered so much from the leader’s indifference, from his obstinacy at seeing in him only as an immature little brother that he had snapped.

Suddenly, jumping from roof to roof, he got a sight of Foot soldiers. It wasn’t at all their usual criminal activity spot and it seemed shady to him. He hesitated on what to do. Should he call his brothers for reinforcement? He decided to start by listening to a bit of conversation between them. He could get intel from them that would allow him to shine with Leonardo. The leader would be more likely to listen favorably to Mikey if he managed to get info about Master Splinter. But maybe he also blamed her for not calling them? Torn apart, he texted his brothers: _“Foot. Mulberry.”_

Only the leader replied:

_“Well done. Stay covered. I’m on my way.”_

The “well done” tickled Michelangelo pleasantly, despite his desire to hold a grudge against his older brother. He couldn’t help it. To hold a grudge wasn’t in his nature and to be spiteful, neither. Brooding too long was getting old and his cheerful personality tried desperately to again find reason and excuse to Leonardo’s harsh reaction. Maybe Leo had been shocked to get confessed to. Perhaps he was disbelieving about how lucky he was to have a partner and needed time to get used to the idea. Leo had always loved to be independent. Or it was afraid that Mikey would boast about having topped the leader and he would lose the respect of his family. Yes, it must be that, Mikey supposed, blowing in his hand after having rubbed them together to get a little warmer. Leo was very concerned about his image, his leader’s duty and the opinion his youngest brothers had from him. He had to apprehend the reaction of their other brothers that they had sex. After all, Leo was feeling it until Raph barge in the lair. The Fearless Leader must have been scared to get caught red-handed and this why he had been extra-cold the next morning. Mikey was sure Raph and Don wouldn’t give a flying fuck. They would be happy for them and probably hook together. If Raph and Don were lovers, Leo wouldn’t have a reason to refuse him. He would no longer find it a bad idea when he would see that loving each other on another level was making everything must easier. Perhaps Don and Raph didn't reply right away because they were busy screwing somewhere? It could be, well Mikey hoped it was the reason. 

From his spot, he could understand what the Foot soldiers were saying and he focused on the words to report them dutifully to the leader. It wasn’t that Mikey was so eager to get Master Splinter, but the reward for having something important to communicate was a thrilling prospect. 

“Karai told us to take the blue-banded turtle. She’s the only one she needs for the plan.”

Mikey paled and pulled his phone out. Hadn’t he just told his brother to join him? Leo was going to throw himself in the tiger den! If Don and Raph arrived at the same time, fighting would be easy, but otherwise, if they all got on Leo ...it would have only himself to defend him.

Hurriedly, he typed to Leo to not come.

His heart raced when he saw that Leo wasn’t texting him. The leader must be rushing in case Mikey was in trouble. Suddenly, the idea of tricked them came to him.

He had Leo’s blue bandana on him, the one he had jerked off with.

He didn’t know the location of Raph and Don, because he hadn’t listened to the damn plan, but if two turtles wore a blue bandana, the Foots could be confused, a few more minutes, giving more time for Don and Raph to join.

He searched his obi before the brain even made the decision. He had to put it on before Leo arrived, otherwise the leader would want to stop him. Leo couldn’t love him in a way a lover does, Mikey knew Leo cared for him deeply and would refuse Mikey endanger his life. 

Mikey tied up the blue bandana and he nervously grabbed his T-PHONE. If he managed to operate the geolocation application, he could know how far his brothers were from his location and knew how long he had to distract them.

He pressed what seemed to be the right key and a loud voice sounded.

“Hello, I’m April, your servant bitch. What can I do for you? I didn’t understand your question.”

It was Don’s homemade version of Cortana, but it had been much louder. The Foots, to the sound of the electronic voice, turned around and lighted the alley and seeing the gun dart they had, Mikey knew he had made a big mistake. 

“It’s him! The blue bandana turtle. Get him.”

When Leo arrived a few minutes later, distraught, he found only an orange bandana on the ground.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't forget to fill a ballot for the Adults Fanfiction Awards 2019. This story isn't there but many are, from all your favorite authors. It's an important gesture to take at least-barely-ten minute, to fill a ballot to show your appreciation to the authors and artists that entertained you for free the whole year.
> 
> Here the link to the ballot. 
> 
> https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSe1CbVsSKWx-gBNT4MAsVd3zUTf2VPcNtpT-lriIzDY34CiRQ/viewform


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No beta. I'm on a roll. Don't ask why ;)

Mikey woke up with a bucket of ice-cold water splashed at his face. He blinked at the harsh light directed at his eyes, unable to protect them with his bound hands. An imprecise figure loomed over him.  
"It's not him, you fool! This one is the silly one," Karai said with a scowl.

It took a few seconds for a disoriented Mikey to remember how he could have ended being bound to a chair in the Foot's HQ. His eyes caught a glimpse of a splash of blue on the ground. Leo's blue bandana. He had wanted to make a diversion, but he had been shot with a dart before the real Leo came to save the day. Mikey's first reaction was a sense of dread. He never deals with Evil forces all alone. His brothers were always there and the leader always managed to get them back not too hurt to the lair. His brother had told before he leaves about how them being united make them strong. It was indeed true. In a fight, they almost mind blend by the deep knowledge they have from each other, being able to guess what would be one of his sibling next move by sharing a quick glance. But thinking of what Leo told him reminded him of the circumstances. He wanted to prove Leo he was a "man," and that's mean take responsibility. To mourn about his brothers' absence wouldn't help him at all. If he wants Leo to take him seriously, he had to get out of there by his own means. Even their enemy was calling him the silly of the bunch, not being the slightest worried about what Mikey could do, so perhaps they would lower their guards at some point. But before that, he would get tortured for sure. 

Mikey braced himself. He preferred they got him rather than Leo. Karai seemed to have terrible plans for the leader.   
Karai picked the bandanna from the ground.

"Why this masquerade? Leonardo is brave! Why did he let you sacrifice yourself for him?" she snarled.  
Mikey didn't answer, but seeing the kunoichi sniffing the piece of blue cloth like she wanted to grasp his brother's lingering smell, he growled. Stupid, but instant reaction.  
  
"Ah, I see …" Karai made a sneer and Mikey supposed a bitch like her should recognize the smell of cum. "The little soldier sacrificed himself for his leader out of love and the leader doesn't even know. Will Leo only notice your disappearance? You are so pathetic! He doesn't care about you! He would even be pleased to get rid of the nuisance you were."

The words did hurt Mikey. He knew the Foot Princess doesn't know his brother at all and was only trying to hurt him. But the scene with Leo was too fresh and the more insecure part of him wondered if there was a part of truth in these words.

"My brother will come and get me!" he shouted.

Karai's smirk grew.

"Oh, but I count on it. But not before we have some fun. I had planned long hours of play with your brother. You are nothing more than a foolish freak, but I will be able to content myself with it, until I put my hands on your precious Leonardo." 

"You won't touch Leo, you dirty bitch!" Mikey snapped, trying to break freak. "I WILL STOP YOU!"

With the back of her steel glove, the kunoichi hit Mikey in the face, busting his lip.

"You are really into him. It's interesting." She smirked." But you are here through his fault, aren't you? He couldn't protect you. He abandoned you... If you are not convinced, right now, you will be soon," she added, hey eyes gleaming threateningly. 

"Go get fucked by one of your Foot-Bots! Leo has nothing to do with it. He didn't abandon me, I left on my side and ..." Mikey, by instinct, stopped himself.

"You got into an argument? Oh! poor little Michelangelo… that's your name, isn't it?" Karai asked falsely concerned and Mikey knew it was too late. As an elite kunoichi, she had spotted his weak poke and she would poke at it until Mikey snaps. "I'm not so sure because your brother rarely says your name in battle. It's Raph or Donnie, isn't it? They are more useful: A brute and a genius ... But you, what is your use?"

She leaned over him.

"Your brother's bandana reek of sex... but it's not his smell."

She pulled back slightly, triumphant, in front of Mikey's embarrassment.

She tickled him under the chin and slapped him again.

"Here is your use, turtle. You are his fanboy. But I have a newsflash for you: The heroes don't give a damn about their fans," she whispered.

"You know nothing about him," Mikey grunted, tasting his own blood in his mouth. 

"Too bad it's you we have and not one of the two others. I want Leonardo, but I doubt that he will give himself too much trouble for you..."

Ulcerated, Mikey spat in his face.

"Stop talking shit, you bitch! You don't know Leo ... He loves me. He will save me."

Karai pretended to stifle a chuckle before turning back to serious.

"I wish so, but it doesn't matter because, if he succeeds in getting you out, after we're done with you, you will hate him." In front of the mutant's amazed look, she clarified: "You will be my instrument of revenge. You'll destroy Leonardo for me."  


* * *

  
10 months later.

  
Donnie had finally located where Mikey was. Strange, he said, after almost a year without signal, although Donatello had been mandated to use 18 hours daily to find their brothers from his office. At the same time, Raph and Leo searched the whole city at night after a daily training that any elite Swat officer would find far too hardcore. And then, all of a sudden, Mikey's T-Phone was giving a signal.

Leonardo had swept away all of his worries. The leader had been going crazy for 313 days looking for his little brother around the city. It didn't matter if it was a trap or not, Leo had snapped they had to go.  
They had, therefore, found him, unconscious in an alley, his T-phone, conveniently loaded, in his belt.

Donnie had muttered it's looked staged. Even Raph, definitely not the sharpest tool in the box and who had been worried sick too by the youngest disappearance, had asked Leo to reconsider before taking Mikey in.  
They all loved their brother, but it's looked like a trap. Leonardo hadn't wanted to hear anything. He had jumped from the roof, took Mikey in his arms and brought him home, followed by his other brothers.  
Once in the safety of their lair, Donnie had examined him, under Leonardo's very concerned gaze. Their brother had many scars, scratch and poorly healed injuries, but no wound seemed fatal. 

"Hm…." Was all that the scientist had found to say, looking between the thighs of their younger brother, after a ten-minute examination, silent. The more the silence stretched the more Leo was about to lose it. 

"What does 'hm' mean, Don? What did they do to him?" the leader wanted to know angrily, worried about this prolonged silence.

Donatello sighed, obviously not wanting to talk about it. But seeing the leader's insistent look, he gave in.

"He was beaten daily, since his disappearance. Look: Do you see his marks around his neck? They made him wore a collar, probably to discipline him. These scars are due to burns and lashes. I'm going to apply an ointment on them." Don paused, glancing at his brothers over his goggles. "He got raped too. His anus is lacerated."

Raph threw a string of curse and slammed his fist in a wall, while Leo stayed pale and looking sick on the chair, muttering some curse of his own to Karai's address.

"But, first of all, I will prepare a sedative for him right away. When he wakes up. Mikey will probably still be in shock," Don explained. "He may stay shocked quite long after being tortured for almost a year."  
Leonardo opened his eyes wide, full of fury, pain and dismay. Of course, they found Mikey, but it wasn't over. 

"What can we do for him out of avenging him, of course," he said, sharing a meaningful look with Raph. They would tear apart the ones who did this to Mikey.

"Nothing," Don said, spreading the ointment on the unconscious turtle injuries. "The damages are done. He needs calm and comfort and some painkillers," Donatello offered, in a neutral voice, to hide his rage to see their little brother in this state.  
Leo bowed his head, hating his feeling of powerlessness and couldn't help but feel guilty. Mikey had been captured and awfully tortured because he had failed to find him in time. What a pitiful big brother and leader he was!  
Leonardo stayed at Mikey's bedside, never taking his eyes off from him, until his brother stirred on the cot. Mikey opened his eyes and he looked at Leo, without seeming to recognize him at first glance, probably still dizzy from the sedative.

"Hey, little brother ..." Leo murmured, kindly stoking Mikey's cheek.

The bedridden turtle drew back quickly, as if the light touch had burned him, to the great sorrow of the big brother. Of course, Mikey was traumatized and perhaps resentful. Leonardo had to make Michelangelo understand that he would protect him from now on.

Firmly, Leo took his hands. No more hiding games.

"Mikey. You are safe. No one will hurt you anymore."

Mikey's blue eyes cast a look as his eyes were made from porcelain and Leo swallowed hard, reading blame in them. Then Mikey blinked and his blank expression changed.

"Leo?" he called, uncertain, his voice no more than a gurgling sound.

"Yes, I'm here now," Leo said, his eyes full of tears. It was such a relief to hear him talk after ten months of anguish and feeling of guiltiness, wondering where Mikey was and if he was fine. "No one will hurt you anymore, little brother. I'm here," he repeated.  
They hugged and Leo paid no attention to his little brother's long nails digging in his skin Mikey was only relieved to see him. He would move on from this traumatic episode, Leo would make of it. 

  
**  
Mikey didn't leave the infirmary for the first 72 hours because Don had many tests to run. Donatello, whose paranoid tendencies had raised in the last two years, wanted to check for everything. Mikey could be a Trojan Horse, he had said. So, the genius looked to see if anything threatening had been implanted into him: explosive device, contagious disease, geolocation chip. He even gave him a test for sexual infections.

While Donnie was busy doctoring Mikey, Raphael and Leonardo indulged in a very intense training session to blow off some steam.

Usually, the leader was more in control, but this time, he felt so overcome with negative emotions, that he feared to explode at every moment. When he was alone with Raph, the only topic was about their retaliation.

His duty forced him to also watch over his younger brother and so he was doing, thirty minutes thrice a day and a three-hours long watch at night. He didn't see Mikey for so long and besides, Donatello needed to take breaks. But the truth was that he wasn't eager to stay there, especially since his little brother was awake. Each bruise and scar was an accusation against Leo. If the leader had not crossed boundaries with him, Mikey wouldn't have become confused in his feelings. He wouldn't have gotten carried away and therefore, that evening, there would have been no argument that had pushed Michelangelo that evening, to leave alone on his side.

He feared Mikey's reproachful look, though, from the little he had seen, his brother had done nothing like it. But it should only be a matter of time. Mikey was going to charge him. Leo didn't need to hear them. He was filled for remorse since this day and felt like he had one less organ during the disappearance of the youngest Hamato.

So cowardly, he avoided being there more than what Don needed and hidden it by excuses he wanted to plan an attack to avenge their brother.

Leonardo knew he couldn't avoid Mikey all his life and he couldn't hide his uneasiness forever, either. Even Raph noticed it and confronted him about it.

"Fearless, you turned almost insane with worries for ten months. I don't blame you. Myself, I was getting nuts," Raph exclaimed. "But now, he is back. That I am here, at the Dojo pumping iron and beating the shit off this dummy, it's normal, because it's my usual way of coping. But that you're here, with me and not there, with him, I don't get it. You always treated Mikey like your own kid and there, it seems that you avoid him and you let Donnie-boy do your job."

"I'm not the doctor," Leo replied, his voice dull. 

"Well, maybe Don could sew a wound better than you and read a blood sample, but I'm sure as fuck Don isn't the therapist I would want to help me deal with rape aftermath. You're the one spouting wise, borderline mystical shit to get people going. When Casey tried to stab me with this whiskey bottle, you helped me going through."

Leo gave him a blank look. It was utter bullshit. Leo didn't recall having given any tips to Raph after his fight with Casey for the excellent reason Raph had refused to speak about it. If he did, it was with Donnie, since they both got turned down very harshly after a clumsy confession. But it wasn't the point.

If Raphael, who was so little observant, noticed this, his own sensitive little brother must have seen it and suffered from it. Raph was right. Leo used the fact Don was more competent in physical injury to run from his responsibility. 

At the same moment, Don called them. They needed to come into the lab right now.

"Mikey is ready to tell us about his capture and detention. I thought it was important that you were there, mostly you, Leo since you are the leader of whatever we are, now. Besides, Mikey's been asking you non-stop and I'm not sure what to say to cover you up anymore," Donnie explained grimly as he pushed opened the laboratory door to let the leader pass.

Leo compelled the features of his face to twist into a reassuring smile. His younger brother, still lying on the cot, straightened at his approach. His teal eyes shone with an almost disturbing intensity and Leo almost turned back. Then he started to chastise himself: it was his punishment and he would face it. Mikey was going to tell about how he had been captured because the leader had not arrived quickly enough since they weren't together. Leonardo had never really explained to his other brothers why he and Mikey had quarreled and parted. Thank goodness his leadership position kept him from being over-questioned and Don and Raph hadn't believed the wrongs possibly on Leo's side. But, Mikey knew why. He could tell Leo had molested him and after an argument over this, Mikey had fled. The others and even his youngest brother could think that Leonardo had voluntarily taken his time to go to the rescue of Mikey to keep his sin a secret. Nothing was more wrong. Leo had run like a lunatic toward Mikey, but who could testify?

Then, Mikey was going to speak about his months of torture. In any circumstances, it would have been unbearable already, but knowing it was his fault was making it a hundredfold worse, Leo thought a plastered smile on his face.

"How are you, Mikey?" he asked gently, despite his heart pounding. He didn't have to simulate his worry. Mikey's condition was his biggest concern.

Mikey cast a genuine grin.

"Now that you're here, bro, it's better. Damn, you got some muscle when I was gone, but you got the figure of someone not eating enough. I thought of you in my cell. Without me to make you delicious meals, I wondered what you were going to eat."

Leo swallowed hard, feeling like a lump in his throat. Mikey, between two torture sessions, had taken the time to worry about what he was eating.

"I'm fine, Mikey, don't care about me. Let's talk about you," Leo said his voice thick by the emotion. "Donnie told me you were ready to tell us about what happened. Take all your time. You're not forced to tell today the full story."

"I'm hungry," Mikey replied. "I'm willing to talk, but while eating"

Leo was reassured. The request may sound wacky, but coming from Michelangelo, it was normal. He got up to get something, but Mikey held his hand tightly.

"No, bro. Not you. You'll burn to ashes any food you touch," Mikey chuckled, but with a sparkle in his eyes that made Leo uncomfortable, "Donnie will go."

Donatello stretched his long limbs.

"I'm going to make myself some coffee and to ask Raph to do something. He's the only one with Mikey who can make an edible meal. Either way, Leo is best suited to hear your story and develop a strategy over that."

Both Raph and Donnie left, leaving the leader with the youngest. Despite his uneasiness, he kept eyes contact with his brother and didn't pull away from his grip. 

"It's true, you know ... I thought of you ... constantly, to tell the truth," Mikey said slowly. 

Leo fidgeted in his chair. The moment had come. Mikey was going to blame him for all the horrors that had happened to him.

"You know, it was thanks to you that I managed to keep it together," Mikey continued in an even voice. Leo opened his eyes wide. He had not expected this.

"Do you know what I was thinking about?" Mikey insisted.

The leader slowly shook his head. He dared not say anything. He was almost afraid that Mikey would say that the idea of spitting in Leonardo's face, if he make out of it, had been his source of motivation.

"They left it to me ... your bandana." 

Leo narrowed his eyes, not understanding by very attentive to his brother's words.

"Do you know that's why they took me? I used your bandana for them to think I was you. They are so dumb, they couldn't tell us apart."

It was the first time Leo heard about it. They have dozen of bandana and Leo never noticed such a trivial thing like a missing bandana when his little brother had been abducted. 

"Why?" he choked out. It was so dumb. Leo had a bounty on his head in the seven numbers.

"I wanted to protect you. I was smug. Or in love. Or both. Yeah, surely both," Mikey concluded.

Leo stared too dumbstruck by the confession to even speak.

"Anyway, Karai was pissed when they brought me in front of her. She recognized that I was not you. I'm not telling you everything, I don't think you want to hear that. But she left me your bandana. You see, it is still folded in my obi. I kept it clean, as best I could, for you." Mikey rummaged through his belt pocket and he handed a smeared blue bandana to the leader. Leo stretched his hand with reluctance. 

"Yeah, I know, there is blood and cum on it, but hey, I couldn't do better. I was drenched in both all the time. I wasn't allowed to do the laundry, you know?" Mikey explained, matter-of-factly. "But when Dr.Don gave me back my freedom, I will wash it for you."

Leo could not hold back his emotions. Hearing his little brother, telling his horrors in such a detached tone, made him almost mad with pain. The boy was really traumatized.

"The bandana doesn't matter, Mikey ... we'll burn it ... just ... rest. We will talk later," he managed to say.

Mikey frowned.

"I don't want you to burn it. This was my only comfort. I wore it constantly on my wrist for ten months while I was tortured to give them intel. It helped me going through this hell, don't you understand?" Mikey was now upset and mad and Leo made a gesture of appeasement.

"Okay, you're right. You were very brave and we must keep proof of your strength. Forgive me," the leader said in his smoother voice. He wasn't sure if he understood Mikey's reasoning, but he wasn't going to upset him for a torn fabric.

"And mine, what did you do with it?" 

Leonardo was confused for a moment. Then he realized that his younger brother was talking about his orange bandana, abandoned in the alley, the day of his abduction.

"I put it in your room. Other than that, it has remained intact. I made sure that nobody came in, to keep it as you left it, for your return." 

Mikey sighed, resting his head on the pillow.

"I would have preferred you to wear it," he mumbled bitterly.

Mikey thought he was forgotten, but it was wrong. Leo had to show that if he failed to find him, it had been his daily purpose.

"I thought of you night and day, Mikey," he said fiercely. He started pacing. "We have been looking for you tirelessly. When I wasn't developing strategies with Donnie, I trained with Raph, to become better and to be able to defend yourself better when the time comes!"

Mikey looked unimpressed.

"Still, you haven't found me, Dude." The tone was casual but Leo sat back on his chair as brutally that if he had got slapped. "Then, without Karai, who would have grown tired of me, you would never have saved me."

Leo stayed mute under the accusation.

"Why were you looking for me so much, first?" Mikey wondered, looking vaguely interested.

Leo was dismayed by the question.

"Mikey, you're my brother! You are the sunshine of this clan!" Leo had no idea how to answer such a self-evident question. "You are an irreplaceable part of our team and I love you like a son! Of course, I would look for you. I would have never stop!"

Mikey's aquamarine eyes took the hardness of a flint.

"Ah, yeah, excuse me. After about a year, I had forgotten that I was your surrogate child."

Leo no longer understood anything. What did he say wrong? He took Mikey's hand again.

"Mikey, I think you're not ready to talk about all this. I'm going to go see what the others are doing and I'll bring you food and drink, okay? A little something sweet will do you good…"

Snickering, Mikey rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, sure, Leo, while I was getting fucked by guys twice my size or I was electrocuted, I was keeping telling myself that I can't wait to be home to make myself a banana split." He snorted. "Playing Marie-Antoinette, today? Let's him have cake?" Mikey mocked. 

Apprehensive, Leo stood still. He had never felt so useless and incompetent.

"Donnie is going to give you a sedative, you're going to be able to sleep well," he said in an attempt to placate Mikey. 

"I spend more than half the time high there," sighed the youngest, annoyed. "Not that I complain about it, because sometimes it was making it more bearable, but now that it is a little less gloomy, I would like to live in reality. Then, to sleep well on a cot seems very unlikely, dude."

Leonardo, although confused, knew his brother enough.

"Okay, Mikey, what do you want, um?" Leo asked nervously. Every reference to Mikey's detention made him feel like a hot thorn in his heart. "I know it's pretentious on my part to think that I can do something that can help you forget this horrible nightmare, but ... "

Mikey stopped his mea culpa with a smirk.

"But you can, bro, I have been waiting for you to ask me this question from the beginning."

Leo leaned in, focused on what Mikey would say, determined to give him anything he wanted if that means it could free him from a little guilt.

"It's simple. I haven't showered in a month. Washing would be good."

Leonardo smiled genuinely. This request was easy to fill and reasonable.

"Of course. You want me to tell Don .."

"No need," Mikey said emphatically, unplugging his drip himself, pulling out the needle, as if he wasn't scared anymore of them. "I told you. These motherfuckers drugged me daily. I am used to it." he explained to him, having followed Leo's astonished look. The leader didn't lecture Mikey about his language. It was untimely. "You can accompany me. No need for others. You are the Fearless Leader. You can deal with me if I faint, right?"

Leo nodded and helped his younger brother out of bed, then walk out of the lab.

On the way, Raphael, who met them, was turned over by a simple sign from Mikey.

"I'm going to take a shower. I already have a big brother with me. No need for two."

Leonardo found Mikey unnecessarily harsh. Raph was anxious about their younger brother. But Mikey could afford to have an attitude after what he had gone through, Leo supposed. Don had warned them Mikey would stay troubled for a while.

When they got to the bathroom, Leo turned on the water and set the temperature very warm, as Mikey liked.

Turning around, he saw that his brother hadn't made a move to undress. Leo wasn't surprised. Mikey liked to be mothered sometimes. At least, before his teenage crisis.

Gently, he untied Mikey's belt, which was almost all he had left.

"I will wait just behind the door…" Leo said, turning his back to leave.

"No, Leo, you have to stay. I want to polish my shell too and I still have so much back pain and everywhere, in fact…"

It was plausible. So Leo started to get rid of what he was wearing. He pretended not to show his discomfort about the intense gaze that scrutinized him. But, finally, exhausted from the silent examination, he looked up.

"You have more defined muscle, but you have lost weight. You're still handsome, but I think a little ounce of fat on your body won't hurt you. Don't worry, tomorrow I'll take back control of the kitchen," Mikey exclaimed in his natural, carefree tone.

Gently, while taking the soap in hand, Leo explained to Mikey that he didn't have to cook for anyone, even less for him. At the same time, he tried not to emotionally collapse in front of all the wounds, not yet healed, of his brother. Everywhere, he would discover a new one, revealing another atrocity suffered by the youngest.

"How do you find me? I got muscle too, I think?" Mikey asked. 

Indeed, now that Mikey wasn't lying in the cot, he could tell his brother had gained muscles too. It wasn't only that. He seemed to have a growth spurt in the Foot cell and was about four inches taller. But of course, since Mikey was still a child when they took him away. But it was still a little surprising, he mused. jail life and torture don't make you more in shape.

"They forced me to train in an awful arena against big mutants. I felt like in a kind of twisted Gladiator movie with Karai getting off on it on her throne," Michelangelo said like he was reading into Leo's mind.

How Karai had dared to mistreat Mikey so badly, Leo raged mentally. She has a beef with him, not his family. What she did was beyond repair. He was washing his brother's lower breastplate without a second thought and with great delicacy when he felt and saw his brother's physiological reaction. The bottom of the chest swelled and cautiously, pretending not to have noticed, Leo pulled his hand away, avoiding the area.

He then decided to devote himself to the shell that Mikey absolutely could not clean alone and who wasn't a tricky place.

"You know what Leo ..." questioned Mikey hoarsely, looking over his shoulder. Without waiting for the answer, he continued:

"I was glad that you were my first ...I would have been disgusted by sex for life, otherwise."

Leo blushed and said nothing, continuing to rub, faking to be engrossed in the pattern of his brother's shell.

But Mikey wasn't the type to drop it and the young mutant raised his rump, making his tail twitch tantalizingly.

"But hey, I will gladly take a booster shot ... you know, to erase their memories."

The pheromones smell filled the bathroom and it took Leo a moment to regain his senses and reply.

"Are you crazy? Don says you're hurt… there," he exclaimed, flustered. He could have given many reasons for his refusal, but the request, as direct as it was unexpected, had shocked him too deeply.

"The pain doesn't bother me anymore and Don lubed me," he concludes with a salacious wink. "Or you know, if you prefer, I can do you. I fantasized about your ass for ten months." Mikey's voice was dripping with desire and arousal poured out from him like steam. "I'm not a clumsy cherry-boy or a one-pump chunk, anymore. I can drive you crazy with lust."

Leonardo from crimson became pale, when he realizes that his brother had taken out his cock, pumping it without shame. Instinctively, he threw the brush at Mikey's feet. He could imagine that his brother was traumatized, but there was a limit. A limit that Leo would never cross again. If he had remained wisely on the side of common sense, none of this would have happened to begin with. Mikey needed care, but Leo had to stay consistent. In a few months, with a constant attitude of big brother, caring but firm, Mikey would get used to his "life before."

"I have finished. You can stay in the shower a little longer. I recommend the cold water," the leader declared, leaving the bathroom without looking behind him.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No Beta, art still to come.

Leo, still shocked, tried to keep a neutral face when he joined his other brothers in the kitchen. Mikey had made explicit sexual advances to him, just after being rescued from a hell where he was raped daily. Don could have warned him about Mikey would be traumatized, but Leo had believed it would mean Mikey would be quiet and withdraw and will ask to be nurtured. But it was like the opposite.

Mikey wasn’t okay, but could he blame Michelangelo? No, he could only blame himself, Leonardo and Deadpool. Without this ridiculous and overly violent film, Mikey would not have started to have such high expectations about life. Leo knew that Mikey should have waited two or three years, the time to mature before watching an adult movie.

He slid into the kitchen chair without a word. What was Mikey doing right now? He had a good guess; Mikey pumped his cock, perhaps groaning Leo’s name. He fidgeted in the chair, uncomfortable. What the youngest had proposed was insane. He shouldn't think about it anymore.

Mikey arrived in the kitchen five minutes later. Leo kept his eyes downcast on his cup of tea. The youngest didn’t mind him and went straight to Raph, looking over his shoulder. "What are you doing to eat, huh?" He didn't seem to be pleased by Raph choices.

"Come on, dude! Mashed potatoes and that's it? No wonder Leo looks like he had been starved.”

Next to Leo, Don glanced up.

"It's quite interesting that you Mikey, despite your detention, you haven’t lost any weight,” Donatello wondered aloud.

Leo looked up; it was right and he had thought the same in the shower, earlier. Mikey seemed to be confused for a moment.

"They forced me to eat disgusting things that I prefer not to remember. They force-fed me with funnels and syringes,”he explained dryly. "Move, Raph. We will try to save what can be saved. Get me some Parmesan or any cheese. And bacon, if there is any. Any shallots or herbs. Then a vegetable, anything you can cook quickly.”

Raphael retorted he got this and Mikey should rest. The youngest shook his head.

"Stop mothering me. I'm fine, okay? Leo is the one about to get sick if he doesn’t eat a proper meal!" He searched into cupboards, uttering yelp of discouragement. "Tomorrow," continued Mikey, "You and Donnie are going shopping. I'm going to make a list of what we need."

No one spoke even if being bossy wasn’t Mikey at all and Raph couldn’t stand being bossed around. No doubt they would do all the whims of the youngest for weeks, Leo supposed, out of guilt. But there were limits as to what they could do. He tried to expel from his mind the images of what had happened earlier in the shower. He couldn't ask Donatello if it was an explainable reaction. Then he would have had to explain something else to Donnie as well.  
Leo didn’t know how he should take Mikey's pretension to prepare the meal "for him." Mikey must have used any pretext to justify being the one in charge of the kitchen. It was just that. Mikey had always loved to cook for them. He had always said he put his mind at ease. No need to put more thoughts into it. Ten minutes later, a plate was in front of him. The content there seemed more appealing than what they had eaten for months.

"Sorry, bro. I did with what you had," Mikey said casually, shrugging. He didn't look angry at Leo, despite his refusal earlier. Maybe it was just a joke. Mikey had always had a unique sense of humor.

Leonardo ate in silence. Raphael made the conversation and that even made the meal too strange to be really pleasant. Raph, usually, was eating while watching the sports news on his phone, period.  
Donnie seemed to be deep in thought, then he seemed to make his mind.

"How did you escape, Mikey? You didn’t tell us."

Michelangelo looked down, looking hurt.

"Do I have to talk about it?"

Perplexed, Donnie insisted.

"Mikey is an important data. Did they let you go or did you run away?”

The youngest glared at the genius.

"A data, Donnie?" Is that what it is for you? Do you want to know one scale from one to ten how painful is to get shocked?"

Donatello rambled into laborious justifications. Leo admitted that Don was right. It wasn't like he asked for any details of Mikey's torture. It was an attempt to sidetrack the conversation and Leo was determined to get to the bottom of certain matter.

"I wonder the same," the leader stated. His intervention took Mikey by surprise, but he surrendered to Leo’s order.

"I don't want to traumatize you with what happened," Mikey explained. "I don't want you to look at me with disgust or pity. Let's just say that Karai challenged me to do something, that I won and that I was able to flee. I would say no more. Except for my diary, if I feel the need.”

Leo made a gesture to cut Donatello, who was going to open his mouth. Of course, it wasn’t making that much sense. But the diary option suited Leonardo. He would read Mikey's diary as usual. Reading his brother's abuse would be slightly more bearable than hearing it at the table in front of the whole family, and the experience was likely to be less traumatic for Michelangelo too.

"Do you like it, Leo?" Do you want anything else?”Mikey asked eagerly.

The question took Leo aback. He noticed that, unlike the others, he had barely touched his plate, which seemed to worry Michelangelo.

"No, it was delicious, Mikey. I'm just not used to eating that much anymore. We could watch a family movie tonight since you're better. Would it please you?" the leader offered, with a strained smile. A quick return to normality would make his little brother the highest good. Video games, comics, television and cooking, will soon replace the memory of sexual abuse. Leo got up and declared Donnie and he would wash the dishes. He wanted to speak in private with the scientist and also, he admitted, not to be alone with the youngest. The memory of the shower and of Mikey's hard cock was far too vivid in his mind. He sent his two other brothers to the living room to play a video game.  
The first plate hadn’t touched the water that Mikey returns to the kitchen, saying he missed his brothers, not a videogame. Leo turned around, puzzled. He had sent Mikey AND Raph. The youngest could talk with Raph, right?

"Donnie, don't you have my test results, like AIDS or whatever, to finalize?" Mikey asked nonchalantly. Just by the sound of his voice, it was clear that Mikey didn't care about the result. Donnie nodded and left without a word. A bad feeling crept into Leo, but he kept a poker face. It was like that since forever with Mikey; if one ignores his antics, he will stop. 

But Mikey wasn’t done with Donnie.

"When you are done with this, download the Games of Thrones series for me. I heard about it at the Foots. I think there are about eight seasons to download. It will keep us busy for a few weeks.”  
Donnie didn’t protest either to be ordered around. Don wasn’t compliant anymore, with Leo as he had been before. So to see Don so quick to obey shocked him. But was it that surprising? Mikey, with his terrible trauma, completely dominated them. They all think that Mikey could afford to give orders to his elders who had failed to save him for ten dreadful long months.

Michelangelo approached from the sink where Leo was and the leader did his utmost to keep a calm air. Mikey had probably understood, in the shower. He wouldn’t insist anymore. Therefore, he continued with indifference to wash the dishes when a light touch almost made him jump out of his shell, proving that his placid air was only a facade.  
Mikey had brushed his lips on Leo’s shoulder.

"Do you have a new scar?" Mikey breathed next to his ear and Leo realized that Mikey was now taller than him. It made something twitch inside of him and turned his inner agitation sharper.

“It’s from a Purple Dragon. He jumped on me from behind with a butterfly knife,” Leo replied, his heart pounding, while Mikey’s finger traced the scar he had just kissed and idly stroked it.

"Hmm ... The other two weren't with you?" You should show me this motherfucker. I'll make a mess from him, ”Mikey said carelessly, as his other hand, subtly, descended along Leo’s shell, dangerously approaching his tail.

The coarse word brought the elder out of his trance. Mikey could have been tortured, it wasn't a reason to be vulgar over such a trivial matter like a wound. But to be honest, the skinship was the thing troubling him. He had lived too long with Raph to get angry for some crude words.

"Watch your language, Michelangelo. “And your hands!” Leo hissed, disengaging himself sharply. 

Smiling, Mikey raised his hands in a gesture of surrender.

"Okay, don't get mad! My hands are in the dishwater now,” he apologized, taking a saucepan.

"To answer your question," Leo continued."Raph and Don were there. We don't leave each other anymore. Well, Don sometimes was staying in his lab, but he was moni…”

"What does that mean? Are you fucking together? Did you slip into their bed while I was away?” Mikey asked angrily, dropping the pan down loudly.

Leonardo was shocked by Mikey’s accusation. He was trembling with such anger that the leader was destabilized.

"No! Of course not! I just want to say that I don't want any of my brothers to endure what you've been through,” he explained, scandalized. Then Leo decided it was time he pulls himself together and acts like the leader he was supposed to be. It had delayed too long.

"I would no longer slip into anyone's bed. Neither Raph's, Don's, nor yours. I would content myself with my wrist, to which I cannot do any damage, apart from a strain,” he declared, continuing to do the dishes.   
Mikey said nothing and continued to wash the rest of the dishes as well. After a moment, he whistled as usual and part of Leo's worry was wiped out. However, as soon as he entered the living room, he rushed to sit in the open space next to Raphael. The latter had been so often overlooked by the youngest that Leonardo thought that the hothead must have needed some comfort.

They watched the first six episodes from the series Mikey ‘heard from the Foots.” Since when the Foot shared television show recommendation? Leo admitted that his brother was right and that the series was very captivating, although he didn’t fully understand the circumstances in which Mikey had learned about it. On the other hand, the incestuous passion between the two Lannisters made him uncomfortable. Was that the reason for Mikey's interest in this series? Was the youngest trying to send him a message? Leo tells himself that he attached too much importance to this fact. This romantic relationship was only a background plot.

It was nearly one in the morning and the leader's eyes closed. The seventh episode was about to start, but Leo, despite the quality of the series, fell asleep. All the brothers were tired, but no one dared to disappoint Mikey. He put his head on Raphael's shoulder for a moment and dozed away a moment. Mikey got up straight away.  
"We will watch the rest tomorrow. Good night.”

Leonardo was too exhausted to point out that it was he was the one calling the shot. He went to bed and fell asleep immediately.

His extreme tiredness didn’t prevent him from being awakened by a heavy breath. Leonardo was a ninja always on guard. He didn’t move, kept the same breathing rate and didn’t open his eyes. Anyway, in the too dark room, he would have seen nothing.  
The brother in his room, probably Mikey, because who else suddenly came into his room at night didn’t touch him. But he distinctly heard the sound of the flesh against the flesh. It was impossible that it was Donatello or Raphael. Neither of them would have come to his room to masturbate on an asleep Leo. Donnie had his computer and Raph had his magazines. But Mikey was afraid of the dark and could stand to stay too long in a room without light. Was he not anymore?

Leonardo was wondering if he should show that he was awake or not when he heard his name being groaned. The smell and the droplet told him that it was too late to stop Michelangelo. Mikey had cum on him and nausea took him, not only because of his stained bedsheet but also because for Mikey to went that far, he really needed mental care.

He still didn't move and waited for Mikey to leave the room. After a while, he was confident enough to turn on the light, tormented.  
What Mikey did was wrong, but at least his younger brother seemed to have accepted Leo’s refusal. Mikey hadn't tried to touch him, just masturbating a few steps away. Was it the behavior of a raped person? Or was it Leo’s fault when he had the very wrong idea to slip into Mikey’s bedroom. 

But tomorrow he'll go see Donnie he promised to himself after a long hour staring at his ceiling. His sleep was plagued with dreams of Mikey in the shower. When Leo got up at 5.30 am, he stared incredulously at his morning hoodie, something he didn't have for ages. He refused to take care of it, too worried Mikey would creep into his mind despite himself and he decided he would go thought his routine past Mikey’s last birthday and then, ask Don’s advice. Mikey needed therapy and whatever Raph could think, perhaps Don was better placed to do it. Leo was too much involved in the root of the problem for him to help. Leo was to the point that it didn't matter that his sibling knew he had sex with Mikey before. What mattered was that Mikey could heal. The poor boy had already suffered too much. He got out of bed with difficulty, having slept less than three hours, dragging himself to the kitchen, saying that after a cup of tea, everything would be better and that he would see clearly enough to face his day. He was shocked when he saw Michelangelo busy behind the stove.

"Mikey? What are you doing up?” he exclaimed, surprised. 

"I didn't have very regular sleep cycles at the Foot." Mikey grinned ironically from over his shoulder. “I’m cat napping... Because who knows when they could get to me to torture me again.”  
Leo's guilt comes back at full speed. The memory of the night took a back seat in front of such distress. He reached for his brother to stroke his cheek.

"My poor Mikey, I hope one day I can make you forget his torments."

Mikey pulled Leo’s hand from his face, to kiss the inside of the palm gently.

"It's going to be fine, Leo. I only need some loving ..." he murmured, full of intent. Leo's heart started beating at top speed at the word" love."

"If it is brotherly love, you will overdose from it," Leo tried to joke, uncomfortable. “We all found your absence unbearable,” he explained emphatically.  
Mikey dropped his hand.

"Yeah, sure. It must have been really hard for you ... but you were three. I was alone. You have become so close, meanwhile... I feel ... like a stranger."

The leader exclaimed that nothing could be further from the truth, but stubborn, Mikey continued.

"You fell asleep on Raph's laps yesterday and, before I left, you weren’t such on good terms." Mikey's voice was almost threatening in tone.

Leo started to deny that he didn’t feel asleep on Raph’s lap, just dozed off on his shoulder and explain it was Mikey’s disappearance who pull them together, but Mikey changed the subject.

"What bothers me the most is to have missed Christmas and New Year's Eve. Such a stroke of bad luck to be abducted like two weeks before Christmas! Thanks, God, I could make it for your birthday next week.”

The leader told his younger brother that he had missed nothing at all, that the holiday had been joyless and that, moreover, no one had unwrapped his presents.

"Let's do Christmas and New Year's Day, then,” Mikey suggested eagerly, getting closer. “Let's say… tomorrow night?”

It was a caprice very old-Mikey-like. Leo gave in and replied it was a good idea. Satisfied, Mikey turned away.

"I'm making pancakes for you. Don't talk to me about training. It's in three hours from now. You will have time to digest.”

  
Leo smiled, with a hint of uncertainty. "Mikey, don't worry about me. It was you who suffered...”

  
Mikey looked up, busy measuring the flour."Oh… so, didn't you suffer from my absence?"

  
Was Mikey getting him wrong one purpose? Leonardo tried to explain himself again, but Mikey shook his head.

  
"Stop it with the lips service. You know what kept me alive over there when I was raped with a chipped coca-cola bottle?”

Leo paled at sordid details and wished the conversation stopped there but invited Mikey to continue, anyway. 

"When I was about to kill myself to escape this hell because I suffered too much, I told myself that when you would see me again, you would kiss me with the same force like the one you missed me with." Mikey was now dangerously close. When did he get that close?"I remember your lips. Sweet but fiery. Do you remember mine? Have you ever thought about it?”Mikey's voice was now ina low-husky pitch.

The truth was that yes, Leo had often thought about the caresses they shared. But with remorse, as being one of the indirect causes of the kidnapping of his younger brother.

"Show me how you missed me, Leo. That what kept me sane didn’t exist only in my mind. Just a kiss, to compensate for almost ten thousand hours of suffering… ”

Without noticing, Leo half-opened his lips and tilted his head. Mikey asked a kiss in order to forgive him. The leader imagined his brother, forcibly penetrated by a broken bottle and the rest was done by himself.  
Mikey captured the leader's lips and chewed them passionately before opening them to bury his tongue while pressing against the elder's body. It only lasted a minute: a full minute when Leo struggled between indignation and excitement. But before he could break it and protest it was too much, Mikey stepped back, looking satisfied.

"See? It wasn't so bad, right? I’m a great kisser, now, am I?”

As if nothing had happened, he returned to his pancake mix, leaving Leonardo dumbfounded. Maybe Mikey, all this time only wanted to have some tenderness display. Maybe yesterday's sexual offer was just an awkward attempt to gain attention and affection, he who had been so deprived of it during his time with the Foots.

The rest of the morning went well. Breakfast was almost like any other time, except that Mikey had a little something different. Leo knew that it wasN’t only in his head since Donnie didn’t take his eyes off Michelangelo. The leader said to himself that after such trauma, anyone would have changed, but that didn’t seem to be a sufficient reason to Donnie's opinion, who suddenly seemed to have made a decision.

"Mikey, I have a few questions for you, so, if you want, after training ..." Mikey snapped his head as quickly as if it had been burned.

"No. I’m done with your tests and questions. I tried to go over this but... At the Foots, I was tortured in a lab…. Ask me your damn questions here and no more than three,” he ordered, sitting down abruptly.

"Okay, fine," Donatello yielded, his voice clipped."Tell a secret that each of us has, that no one knows about."

Mikey's keen gaze scanned the three of them before landing on Leo and the leader felt a knot in his stomach. Indeed, he had a secret that only Mikey know. The youngest chuckled, probably reading what was happening in Leo’s mind. Mikey seemed to find it funny, but Don's question was relevant. Leo had doubted a few times if it was the real Michelangelo with them.

"Okay, Don, you think I'm a clone and I get a basic briefing on each of you? Sorry, bro, I’m not that cool,” Mikey snickered. “But for you let go of my shell, I'm going to answer to your stupid request. You beat off on snuff movies with redhead girls.”  
Leonardo felt like he got a sucker punch in the guts and with disbelief, he stared at Donnie. The genius’s guiltiness was evident on his features. So it was true. Was it that surprising, considering how Don mistrusted human now. Mikey, satisfied to have troubled Donnie, turned to Raph.

"Raph hides gay BDSM magazines much more conscientiously, while girls' magazines are easy to find. He also has a special toy in his ... "  
Raph knocked over the table to rush to strangle Mikey and Leo out of his stupor to prevent him, recalling Raph about Mikey being still shocked from his time detained.

"You asshole, you sneaked in my room. I don't give a damn about if it’s trauma talking. I will pummel ya!”

“Blame the brain, not me. Without his paranoia, no one would know that you fantasize about guys in leather shoving it up to your ass, ”Mikey retorted casually, rolling his eyes.  
In his attempt to prevent the fight, Leo knocked himself on the concrete wall and slip on the tiles.

He must have lost consciousness since when he opened his eyes, his head was on Michelangelo's lap in the living room. A blanket had been spread over him. He made an attempt to move.  
"Don’t get up. We didn’t fight and everything is fine. You may have a concussion, Don said. So no training for you."  
  
Don’s name reminds Leo what had occurred before.

"Mikey, you shouldn’t have said those things ... "Leo began to reproach him seriously, but with a kind voice."What Raph does in private is nobody's business and you know how short-tempered he is."

Sullenly, Mikey shrugged;

"Don asked for it. Then you could have prevented this at any time.” A smirk stretched on Mikey’s features. It was strange Leo noticed how, without his bandana, Mikey was looking different. It wasn’t only that, but it face had grown older while he was gone. He had lost the chubbiness of his cheeks. Leo guessed it was a normal change for someone just out of prison, after months of tortures. But he could understand Donatello’s suspicions because he shared them. “You know that it's me. Otherwise, I wouldn’t know that you like it, like that. ”Mikey’s warm hands trailed down on his brother’s sensitive side. Leo shivered, but Raph arrived, looking embarrassed saving Leo.

"I'm sorry Leo, I acted like a moron.”

An apology from Raph happened one a blue moon and Leo wanted to get up to show Raph he wasn’t angry, but Mikey prevented him from leaving his laps.

"Stay a little longer. We can watch the rest of the episodes… ”

Donnie arrived with the USB drive and explained that two episodes were okay, but that Leo should not tire his eyes. After the episodes, Donnie stood up and said he had to do.  
Mikey sneered: "Sansa Stark with her red hair turned you on. Admit it, dude.”

Don blushed with shame and anger and Leo looked away, feeling sick. He couldn't believe what Mikey had said about Donnie was true. Did he really like to see young girls raped and tortured live and maybe even killed? Don was sick.   
To distract the attention from him, Donatello spat:

"And Leo, huh? Your precious Leo, what is his secret?”

The heart of Leo was pounding and he felt a cold sweat while in slow motion, he saw Mikey licking his lips before spilling Leo’s juicy secret. Because if Don had fantasies, Leo had taken action.

“I believe that one of the haikus in one of his books can have an erotic double entendre. But for the rest, I can't say, because I respect Leo too much to sneak into his room, without his permission, ”announced the youngest slowly.

Donnie made a contemptuous sniff and Raph mumbled something around ass kisser, while Leo thought it was a huge lie, thinking back of what Mikey did the night before. Mikey couldn't guess the leader wasn't really sleeping, right? Did Mikey also enter his room during his absence? Leo had only one secret to hide from his three brothers, a secret that could make an explosion worse than those of Raph and Donnie together. But Mikey must not have discovered it. Otherwise, he would have told him about it.  
He had missed Raph's reply, too caught up in his thoughts.  
Mikey replied:

"I don't see why you make a big deal from it. You like hardcore sex. I like hardcore sex. Leo too, but he doesn't know it yet. There is no shame to feel. I know, Leo knows, you know, so that's great! Stop hiding. Already we have to hide from humans, we won’t hide from ourselves!”

Raph and Don seemed to ponder over Mikey’s comment while Leo mused what Mikey meant about loving hardcore sex. Mikey must have experienced something else, because, between them, it had been very vanilla. But Donnie wasn’t done.

"What about you, Mikey? You spread out our lives in front of everyone, so spill about yours! We will all be event, except Leo, the Buddhist monk.”

"Me? but I already told you: I'm in love. It's more exciting than any of your twisted fantasies, isn't it?”

Donnie rolled his eyes, while Leo’s neurons sent a panic signal to his whole body. Did Mikey talk about him? It couldn't be!

"You cried your soul out in my lab, before this shit with the Foot, that the person didn’t love you back."Leo's breathing caught in his throat. Did Mikey cry to Don before this fatal night? Was he that upset and infatuated about him? "Unless it was someone else," Donatello continued with sarcasm. "Did you develop Stockholm syndrome on Karai and are in love with her? Is that what you are going to tell us? I admit it would be shocking, "the genius sneered.

Motionless, Leo listened to Mikey explain in this new mocking, careless voice; "Nah, I fucked this bitch, but I can’t fall in love with an evil, slutty witch like her.” 

Leonardo temporarily forgot his anxiety to process the new information. The little info that Mikey gave about his time detained by the Foot were ... inconsistent at first sight. Karai had him tortured ...and then, sleep with Mikey? It made no sense and besides, he knew too much Karai to believe that. He really had to get his youngest to confide in his diary, to understand. So he might be better able to help him.

"I prefer a sweet, gentle soul," Michelangelo concluded and their sibling snickered like what Mikey said was very funny and unlikely. Mikey paid them any mind and possessively tightened his grip on the turtle lying on him. Mikey wasn't the only one needing help, Leo reflected. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't forget to fill a ballot for the Adults Fanfiction Awards 2019. This story isn't there but many are, from all your favorite authors. It's an important gesture to take ten minute, to fill a ballot to show your appreciation to the authors and artists that entertained you for free the whole year. 
> 
> Here the link to the ballot.
> 
> https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSe1CbVsSKWx-gBNT4MAsVd3zUTf2VPcNtpT-lriIzDY34CiRQ/viewform


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No beta. Because a few asked for an update.

“Why don’t you have sex together, you and Donnie.” Mikey’s suggestion fell in a stunned silence and Raph gaped. For a moment, Leo forgot about the hand stroking him with less and less discretion. “No need to be crazy in love like I am.” Mikey’s hand held him tighter. “It would be better than jerking off, right? Getting laid would help with this sour mood of yours.” 

As Raph and Don looked at each other, bewildered and shocked, Leo stood up so suddenly that Mikey couldn’t prevent him. What with this insane proposition?

“That’s enough! I don’t want to hear anything sex-related. We have dragged on enough. I feel perfectly fine! Bring your shells back to the Dojo! I’m going to take your mind out of the gutter,” Leo barked furiously. “The last one in the Dojo does 500 push-ups on the board!”

With great strides, he went to the training room. Mikey would learn discretion and decency, by force if necessary.

Mikey uttered frightened screeches and ran into the Dojo as Donnie and Raph stamped on each other so as not to be the last to enter. Leo took his time to be the last to step in and took the punishment for himself. He ordered his brothers to do laps while he was doing his push-ups. Doing it on the wooden board was painful, but Leo didn’t care. It saved him from having to interact with his brother and he could reflect.

Was Mikey in love with someone else that he met after having disappeared? Was Mikey really in love with him? Was it just a fantasy that had grown during his detention with the Foots? Admitting that Mikey really loved him, seriously, what was he going to do? His little brother was going to reveal everything to the others before the end of the day at this rate! How would Don and Raph react? Wouldn’t they be even more unhappy, them, not to know love? It would be selfish for him and Mikey to engage in sexual and romantic relationships when Donnie and Raph have none. It was obvious that the other two were by no means attracted to each other. Leo had to think about their family and their team.

What does him, Leo wants, anyway? Admitting Raph and Don decide to do as Mikey suggested. would he change his mind? Leo, except for a particular tenderness for his youngest brother, felt about the same for Mikey than Raph and Donnie. A deep brotherly love. After having witnessed his two other siblings feel in depression after their headache, Leo had desperately tried to save Mikey. In his naiveté, he had hoped that the few caresses would be enough, but of course, he should have expected Mikey would turn greedy. Now, after what had happened to Mikey, Leo found himself having been unnecessary harsh when he had explained to his brother that they have to stop. If they had lived alone, Leo wouldn’t have minded less. But he had been worried Don so smart, figured it out. Then, everything would have fallen apart. They wouldn’t want to listen to the order of a leader who is an incestuous molester, despite Leo’s good intentions. Then would leave or kick Leo out and then, how he would have dared facing Master Splinter? 

“Bro, it’s been 502 now. Stop,” Michelangelo told him. “Take it easy. You got a concussion!” Leo stood up, rubbing his painful knuckles. He hadn’t even counted, whereas Mikey obviously had. Which meant that the youngest, while running, had watched him. Leo’s uneasiness grew despite how caring the words seemed to be.

“Mikey, take it easy yourself. You haven’t trained for a long time. I won’t be hard on you, but ... “

“Be hard on me as you wish, if it’s about training,” Mikey replied, carefree. “I can take everything you have to give.”

Leo narrowed his eyes. This arrogance was new, but the teasing tone was displeasing him the most. His patience was running tight and at the next innuendo from Mikey, Leo was afraid he would lose it to the point of punching him. He bailed his fist and tried to calm down.

“Mikey is with me, against Raph and Donnie,” he decided, not wanting to cause drama by not choosing Mikey as a teammate as he did before.

He was surprised to find that Mikey had developed new aggressiveness and duplicity in a fight. Raph himself had his shell on the mat. For a man tortured for a month, Mikey seemed in good shape.

Leonardo wanted to study the style more closely and he sent Raph and Don to the bench.

“I’m impressed, Mikey. Face me now.”

Mikey joked that finally, he was at the Boss level.

His younger brother dodged and blocked the hits, but didn’t carry any. Leo, after ten minutes, got angry. He wasn’t used people got easy on him and he took it as an insult. It was worse from Mikey of all people.

“Mikey, attack! I know you can do better than that.”

“Someway, I lost my motivation,” Mikey trailed off, blocking a shuto uke.

Leo was at first flabbergasted and then, overwhelmed by indignation. Never had he received such an outrage. He didn’t have time to respond as Mikey explained.

“Nothing against you, Leo. You’re a good opponent. It’s just that you know, when I was a Foot prisoner, I was fighting for my life, in more appalling conditions than anything you can imagine. Karai gave me these challenges. I had to win to live… and I really wanted to live, you know… to get my reward when I go out. A reward worthy of living for.”

Mikey made a suggestive glance, for Leo to guess easily what was the “reward” expected from Michelangelo. Refusing to think about it, Leo roared:

“Michelangelo, fight me or...”

“You know, when I was a child, Donnie and you gave punishment or reward depending on how good I was to take my reading and writing lessons. Do the same and it will motivate me,” Mikey suggested, licking his lips, a gleam of gluttony in his eyes.

Furious with this blackmail and that Mikey refused to fight on his command, the leader got close enough to whisper.

“If you lose, Mikey, or if you do not fight to my satisfaction, I would never take you as a partner at the Dojo. So that NOWHERE and NO OCCASION, you can touch me,” Leo said, his tone heavy with intent. 

Mikey’s face remained expressionless.

“If I win and pin you, I want you in my room from midnight until I said so. Deal?” he offered in a low voice.

How in the world Mikey could get that cocky? Leo didn’t know and didn’t care. The fact Mikey was traumatized and hurt took a backseat. The leader had been challenged and Leo never took down a challenge, even less when uttered with so much boldness. 

He nodded and went into a fighting position, but instead of doing the same, Mikey stated at a point behind Leo with a weird expression.

“Shit, Don and Raph are kissing.”

Out of instinct, Leo snapped his head to see. His brain barely had time to record that Don was looking at his t-Phone while Raph was yawning that he received a knee kick in the middle of his chest, bending him in half.

He hadn’t recovered from the surprise and the pain that had taken his breath away when Mikey with a leg hook sent him to the mat, then pinned him with his full weight.

Mikey’s lips brushed his skin as he whispered.

“I won: your ass is on the mat, so I want it in my bed tonight.”

“It was ... disloyal ...” Leo protested.

“You know what they say, bro. In love as in war, everything is fair ... “Mikey replied, with a predatory grin.

***

Leonardo had spent the rest of the day in a sour mood, locked in his room. He was meditating for two hours, trying to reach nirvana. But the leader doesn’t have to peace of mind required for it. He knew he looked like a sore loser, but it wasn’t his first concern, as proud as he was. The bet was. He couldn’t escape from going to Mikey’s room at midnight. Leo always kept his word and he refused to give Mikey the satisfaction to believe that he was afraid of him.

Anyway, what could Mikey do to him? Nothing at all! At the slightest unwanted touch, he could fight back or he could always be loud enough to awake Raph’s in the next room. Too bad for the secret! With what he discovered today on them, his other brothers had no room to judge him. Anyway, he would never have to go to that, right? Mikey would be reasonable and understand there was a line he couldn’t cross, whatever happened at the Foot. To celebrate Christmas in September or got to chose the TV show they will watch were things that Leo wouldn’t mind giving Mikey, of course. But to make Leo his emotional and sexual outlet was out of the limit.

Leo fidgeted on his tatami, his legs crossed in the lotus position. Because it was what it was about. Mikey had felt good. He had always been a hedonist, chasing pleasure. Leo had to step down so many times for the youngest to not get sick by overeating sweet. Sex was the same. It was feeling good, so whatever downside it could have, Mikey sees no reason to stop. 

Mikey’s feelings weren’t engaged. Before his abduction, his little brother was confused, nothing more. Leo accepted his responsibility for having awakened this side in his brother. This confusion had been exacerbated during weeks of physical, sexual and mental torture by the Foot clan. Mikey said thinking of Leo had helped him to go through and it was a good thing. But it wasn’t a reason for them to continue what Leo had promised he wouldn’t do anymore. Leonardo sighed and stood up. It was pointless to insist. He couldn’t meditate.   
If only he knew what had happened during Michelangelo’s captivity. Helping him get through and turning back to his usual self would be easier. Perhaps he could negotiate Mikey gave him a more detailed explanation for his willingness to respect the bet. He could then compare with what he wrote in his diary. Because Mikey’s story...was incoherent and if he could catch Mikey’s lying, he would be validated to confront him. Because it was Leo’s first impression: Mikey was lying or hiding something. 

With determination, Leo walked out of his room. He had postponed paying a visit to Don for too long. If Leo had suspicions, Donnie must have as well with facts to back them up. Donatello could hate humans and be jaded about a lot of things and sometimes be a little too harsh; he cared for his family. The leader knocked at the lab door after a quick glance around him and pushed open the door. Donnie was looking uneasy in front of his computer. But the genius frowned when he saw that the leader was locking the door behind him. Then the scientist sighed.

“Look, Leo, Mikey exaggerated, they are not snuff movies ...”

Leonardo made a gesture to demonstrate that this wasn’t his actual concern. Donnie couldn’t believe his luck to not get a lecture and motioned for him to sit down.

“I’m here to talk about Mikey ... he is worrying me.”

Donnie opened his drawer to draw a cigarette, as whenever a topic brought reflection, when, suddenly remembering who he was, he closed it with a snap. Leo didn’t tell him he knew this secret. Don’s smoking habits could wait.

“Keep going,” Donatello ordered nervously, opting to chew on a pen instead.

“Well, he’s uh ...” Leo didn’t know exactly where to start. Should he confess without further preamble that Mikey seemed to fantasize about him?

“Different?” Donnie offered. 

Leo nodded. Maybe that one adjective was enough for Don to diagnose and work out a solution.

“I agree with you ... the problem is Mikey doesn’t want to talk to me about it.” Don uttered a long, exasperated sigh. “This is what sometimes happens to victims. In fact, if we put aside his obvious physical injuries, the only point that our brother has of a person having suffered trauma is his attempt to avoid the matter.”

Leo looked up, eyes wide.

“What do you mean?” The leader knew Don enough to said that everything that Don said has a reason. 

Donnie sighed again. It was apparent he had mused on the topic as much as Leo had.

“Either Mikey is lying and he wasn’t a prisoner or... Mikey is very resilient. Uniquely resilient.” By Don’s face, it was evident that he rather believed the lie option.

“Explain yourself.” Leo was pale. “Otherwise, I will only say that what you tell me is insane.”

“He is cheerful and very energetic. An odd carefreeness for someone that just escaped a place he got tortured. You’ll tell me it’s Mikey and he’s happy to be back, but…He has a confidence he didn’t have before. He was ready to pick a fight with Raph...” Don was searching his words, something rare for the so sharp genius. “Oh forget it, Leo. What did you want to point out to me?” he gave up.

The leader was silent for a moment. What Donatello implied wasn’t making sense. Why would Mikey be so upset, then?

“He isn’t that cheerful…” Leo temporized. “He got more easily angry than before.” Then, Leo realized that Mikey’s short temper expression could have been more with him. “And before that, he was trying to pick up fight with Raph.”

Don raised his hand to stop Leonardo.

“It wasn’t picking a fight. It was mere teasing, but if you came here to try to prove me I’m wrong you can do it…” Don shrugged. “But I was hoping you will give me some data as well. Mikey is thirsty for your attention in a new way.” Don crossed his hand under his chin, his inquisitive chestnut gaze scrutinizing Leonardo. “I’m sure if he is to spill his guts to someone, it would be you.”

“He told me nothing but ... he seems to think a lot ... about sex ...” the elder began cautiously.

Donatello rolled his eyes.

“Leo, you have to stop seeing sex as an illness. It is ridiculous when you’re about to turn 19 years and in your leader position ... “Don turned away like Leo was the hopeless case and he was done dealing with him. “Mikey was feeling horny a few weeks if it wasn’t months before he got abducted. It’s nothing new! He told me about this supposed unrequited love of his. Some human female he must got infatuated with.” Donnie snorted and Leo imagined the genius was playing his last scene with April in his mind. “Mikey’s problem was a broken heart. Was I supposed to do? Me from all people?” he asked bitterly. 

Leo didn’t have time to question the scientist on what Mikey had told him ten months ago that Donnie turned face to him again, a thoughtful expression on his face.

“I admit that Mikey’s proposal to take Raph as a sexual partner was… incongruous. But when you think about it, it’s not that strange from an outside point of view: One of you wouldn’t judge me for my physical appearance. We are four of our species, and unfortunately, all males, but homosexual love was valued in ancient times and still exist. Also, I couldn’t give my trust to someone out of our family. My only question is, why Raph?”

The moment Loe had dreaded was about to happen. Don had done the maths and figured out everything.

“In fact, it makes sense since you act like a eunuch and Mikey is in love.”

Leonardo narrowed his eyes. He was fed up with the comment about his lack of libido.

“I am not acting like a eunuch,” he protested. “I just have self-restraint.” Leo couldn’t believe he could say aloud such a shameful lie without flushing. “Mikey isn’t in love, either ... It’s a silly crush, a fleeting fancy.”

“Are you jealous, Leo? “

Leonardo shook his head fiercely.

“No! He denied energetically. “Why should I be?”

“You could be afraid somebody overshadows your influence on Michelangelo, for example,” the scientist suggested.

Leonardo sneered with a joyless chuckle.

“For that, I should have an influence on him. Did you saw it earlier in the Dojo? He refused to fight me! He disobeyed to a direct order for no reason at all except he wasn’t motivated! “Leo was incensed just thinking about it.

Don shrugged:

“He ended up doing it, right? But this is what I meant when I said he is confident. The fact he grew taller and bigger could explain he is cocky. Did you notice he had about the same bulk than Raph? Don’t tell me he got starved there! He didn’t lose his skills either. If anything, he is just nastier in his fight. This could be explained by the fact he supposedly had to fight for his life, but... it seems that the Foot jail brought better results than a healthy diet and four hours daily in a gym. Even the Fearless Leader got himself pinned,” he mocked.

Leonardo thought prudent to change the subject, not wanting to remember the bet. But the genius had noticed the same things as him. Mikey didn’t physically suffer too much, despite his wounds. 

“So, what do you recommend, Donnie?”

“Avoid confrontation. Be accommodating. When Mikey would feel safe, he would confide in you and you are smart enough to see the truth in what he told you. If we don’t know what really happened, it’s difficult to help him. You are the strategist, Leo, not me. Bring me a prisoner story that makes sense and I could figure out what to do. Maybe before that thing would turn back as they were or we would get used to Michelangelo 2.0,” Donatello concludes with philosophy.

Leo crossed his arms, strumming his fingers on his biceps, in intense reflection. What Donnie said made sense, but the genius lacked crucial information about Michelangelo’s behavior. Leo wondered if he should confess now. He had come to see Donnie with that in mind. The genius wouldn’t judge him and this revelation could be useful. Leo opened his mouth, but Don nervously cut him off.

“Leo, I need your collaboration for a little experiment ... What Mikey said made me think. I would like to test something. It’s not painful,” he hastened to add in front of the concern shining in the gray eyes. “I want to kiss you ...”

Leo froze, not listening to Donatello’s embarrassed arguments, who obviously was trying to convince him to get permission. Leo was about to refuse when he reflected that if he was going to confess having sex with Mikey, to make him feel better, the leader couldn’t deny Donatello a simple kiss.

“Okay,” he gave in.

Donatello approached and took Leonardo’s head in his hands. The genius’s nervousness was evident and Leo told himself that he, the supposed “eunuch” had much more experience than his brother. He took the lead, brushing the olive-colored lips.

He intended to keep the kiss chaste, since he had enough with Mikey’s sexual harassment to deal with. But after the first moment of embarrassment, Donatello seemed of another opinion. While he was going to deepen the kiss, the door opened.

“Well, well, who was there,” Mikey drawled, playing with the kunai he had used to pick the lock. “Leo and Donnie, sitting in a tree…” he started to sing, mocking.

Leonardo took a wide step back, flustered. If Mikey wanted to touch him in his room later, it would be harder to find a reason to refuse without upsetting him.

Donnie explained that it was a “scientific experiment” and Mikey huffed.

“I made a list of the things we were going to need. There nothing good in the fridge and we are celebrating Christmas tomorrow, remember? How much cash do you have, Donnie?”

By means that Leo doesn’t know about-and he really didn’t want to know-Don managed to get some money, for the things they couldn’t scavenge. Until then, they had managed to survive by Donnie’s earning, as little it was. But Mikey shook his head when Don told him the money sum.

“That won’t be enough. It must be a very special Christmas. Unforgettable. Thankfully, I stole some cash from the Foot before running away.”

Leo and Donnie looked at each other, stunned, the kiss shared now on the back burner. Michelangelo’s story was becoming more and more unbelievable.

“How?” Donatello was the first to get his voice back. “Where did you hide it and how much?” he asked eagerly.

“That’s my secret, bro. I wouldn’t tell you where it is, or how I got it, so that you could spend it to buy Leo some flowers,” Mikey replied with a hint of sarcasm.

Donnie was explaining again why they were kissing, but Leo wasn’t listening.  
He was slightly relieved. He had almost feared, as silly as it was, that Mikey would be jealous of Donnie. But Mikey didn’t seem to be at all concerned. Leo smiled: it meant that his younger brother wasn’t in love as deeply as he claimed. It was only about to scratch an itch. This kind of feeling would fade soon.

“I divided the errands list: this is yours, Donnie. Raph has his with his cut of the money.” Mikey, hand over the list and three $100 banknote that Donnie took, his eyes bulging.

Leo frowned. It wasn’t to Mikey to call the shot. Money could impress Donnie, but it wasn’t doing the same effect on the leader.

“Michelangelo, you don’t have to tell Donnie or Raph what they will do. It’s up to me to do it.”

“Sorry bro, my bad!” Again, there was sarcasm in Mikey’s tone. “I didn’t know you were such a control freak; you wanted to double-check the grocery list.” Michelangelo pretended to take back the money and Don’s list.

“This is not the point …” Leo wasn’t liking a bit what Don had called the Mikey 2.0 neither to be called a control freak. Mikey could tell him some terrible tales about his time at the Foot, the chat he just had with Don comforted him in his attitude. Mikey had always required a firm discipline. “We are no longer splitting up, Mikey. Never.” the leader insisted. It wasn’t fully the truth. Don had stayed in his lab while he and Raph had been looking for their missing brother most of the time. “I won’t let any of you wandering alone topside.”

Mikey opened his mouth to defend his point of view and then closed it.

“Okay, do what you want, but I’m going alone on my side. I need my space!” Mikey insisted when Leo was about to protest it was crazy talk. “I was alone all this time without the mighty you to check over me and I survived!”

Guilt stab him again, but Donnie squeezed Leo’s arm to prevent the leader from talking. The leader understood. Donatello had a plan.

“Fine, fine,” Don said. “Where is Leo’s list?”

“I left it on his night table when I saw he wasn’t in his room.” It’s reminded the leader how far Mikey went to find him. He picked the lab door lock. Why was he so frantic to find him? “Come on, Leo,” Leonardo was kicked out his train of thoughts. “I want to show you something.”

Distrustful, Leo still followed his brother to his room after a quick glance at Donnie. The genius relied on him to earn info about Mikey’s detention. 

As soon as they were in the leader’s bedroom, Mikey dropped his mask of indifference.

“How could you, Leo? How could you do this to me?” he asked furiously.

Leo, although he suspected what Mikey meant, played dumb.

“I don’t see what you mean, Michelangelo,” he replied coldly.

Mikey’s teal eyes gleamed with anger.

“Oh no, the power of my full name won’t be enough to make me suck it up. I knew it! You jumped on Don at the minute I left, you little bitch!” 

It took a moment for Leonardo’s brain to proceed he had called a bitch before his motor nerve made him slap Mikey’s twice, once with the flat of the hand and the second with the back.

“Michelangelo, “Leo’s tone was icy. “You forget who you are. I didn’t do anything you imply with Donatello. He kissed me once because YOU put these crazy ideas in his head. Nothing more.”

Mikey was holding his cheek, far from being calm.

“He had to try with Raphael!” he shouted. “So we can have the damn peace, you and me!”

“For the last time, Mikey, there is no such thing as ‘you and me’.” Leo tried to calm down himself for his speech to get through Mikey’s head. He had to be the voice of reason. “You can’t force Raphael and Donatello to start a relationship between them, if they do not want to! This is not your business, anyway!”

Mikey paced.

“How dare you say that, huh, Leo? After all that I have suffered!” Then he burst into tears, dropping on Leo’s bed. “They did all that they could for me to hate you!”

Mikey cries sounded as genuine as a young child and Leo’s guts twisted. Mikey’s tears was a weak spot of him since forever. Besides, in these circumstances, where everything was his fault, Leo felt like the worst big brother in the world. 

He went to his little brother and stroked his shell in a gesture of comfort.

“Mikey… if you told me about what happened at the Foots?” he suggested in his softest voice. I think it would do you some good.”

“I don’t want to relive that, Leo! Can you understand?” Mikey was pissed at the suggestion. “I’m trying to put this behind me!”

“Donnie and I think …” Leo began.

Mikey snapped his head toward him. 

“There no such thing as Mikey and Leo, but there is a Donnie and Leo …”

“Mikey …” It was maddening and Leo doesn’t know what to tell Mikey anymore. “This is not the same thing!”

“Kiss me.” Mikey was half pleading and half demanding. He wasn’t crying anymore. “You can’t refuse me after kissing Donnie.”

Leo couldn’t deny the fact. Arguing would be more energy-consuming than just give in. He was feeling drained.

Mikey’s kiss was much deeper than that of the morning. When his hands started to run down his shell, Leo pulled away.

“Now, it’s over. I won’t kiss you anymore. Neither Donnie,” he added to placate Mikey. “We are putting an end to this chapter.”

“And Raph?”

“Raphael neither!” 

“You always come to my room tonight, right?” Mikey asked, worried.

“Yes,” Leo promised, rolling his eyes. “But don’t think to get more kisses from me. It’s over, Michelangelo.”

Mikey nodded in agreement.

****  
It was five past midnight.

They returned from their errands about an hour ago. Since April and Casey were no longer part of their lives, buying the essentials was difficult. They managed to infiltrate shop and they left the cash on the counter. Well, Leo did.

As he said, Michelangelo had left on his side. They hadn’t followed Him. Letting Mikey get loose would turn him cocky and lead him to make mistakes, according to Donnie. Mikey had arrived ten minutes after them and after a quick greeting, he had locked himself in his room with his mysterious purchases.

The leader was waiting in front of Mikey’s door, still hesitating. He had no idea what Michelangelo was up to, but Leo braced himself for everything. He had to stay firm and coherent. If he wasn’t, Mikey would get even more out of control.

Daringly, he opened the door. He was slightly surprised by the spectacle, but his features remained impassive. A few candles were lit in the room and there was a distinctive sweet smell in the air.

Mikey was sitting on his bed, staring at the nearest candle flame, without turning to the newcomer.

“You can take off your protections and your katanas, Leo. We’re not in the Dojo and you have no enemy here,” the youngest whispered without looking at him. Mikey seemed as tense and anxious as Leo was feeling deep inside of him. Leonardo just hoped it didn’t show on his stance and features as on Mikey’s.

“I’m not so sure,” replied Leonardo in a low voice. “I feel like I don’t know you anymore.”

Mikey slowly turned his eyes to him.

“I may have changed. But no torture would make me your enemy, Leo.”

The voice of Mikey was a soft murmur not fitting with how stiff Mikey seemed to be and Leo was destabilized.

“Take off your clothes and come lie down,” Mikey suggested and the red flag popped into Leo’s mind.   
He shook his head.

“Mikey, I came, but there will be no sex between us and no kiss. We agreed on this earlier.”

“I never said we will have sex. You’re the one bringing this up!” Mikey’s voice was flat as he was rehearsing a lousy play. It was apparent that this part was a lie. “If you wanted to have sex, I won’t refuse you.” Mikey was finally looking at him and in the candlelight, his eyes shone like a cat watching his prey. Again, the thought it wasn't the real Mikey or he had been injected with an unknown chemical brushed him. But Mikey must have read something on Leo’s feature because his whole demeanor changed. “I wouldn’t force myself you! I was raped ten times a day throughout my captivity! Why are you suspicious of me? I just need some tenderness. I was alone and scared and I missed you,” he explained his voice strained. “I want to cuddle, as I always liked. But to snuggle with my bro in a battle suit isn’t the same.”

Leo hesitated only a moment. He had lost the bet, and besides, it was true Mikey had always been affectionate. Before Mikey went missing, Leo wouldn’t have found the request strange. He unstrapped his katanas and undressed completely, sitting next to his younger brother.

Mikey curled up close to him and they remained silent for several minutes. Then Mikey spoke.

“Karai wanted me to hate you. She wanted to make me believe you didn’t care for me. The soldiers who beat me up had to wear a blue bandana and roleplay you.” Leo was speechless in front of such cruelty. He understood better why Mikey needed to be physically comforted by him and he held Mikey tighter. “But I knew it was lies and that one day, I will be in your arms, here. One day when I was drugged, Karai herself put on a blue bandana. She wanted to try a freak, she said. They untied me so that ... I mate with her ... “he said with difficulty as Leo gasped.   
“The good thing was that the bandana helped that it wasn’t too painful. I focused on the blue color and well, it’s you that I imagined fucking, again and again. I know you maybe be against it but my fantasies doesn’t harm you, right? It was either that or going insane.”

Leonardo swallowed heavily and fidgeted on the bed. He slightly released his hold on Mikey, but it was the youngest now that was holding him.

“But you could have attacked her, right? It wasn’t prudent…” Leo said to keep the conversation on track.

Mikey shook his head and pointed the slight mark on his neck.

“Nah! Look: I wore an electric collar. I could get electrocuted anytime. The new scar you see it’s when I hurt myself with the pliers to cut it when I escaped.”

It was the point that was interesting the most Leo. How did Mikey leave? 

“But how did you ...”

“Lie down, I want to massage you,” Michelangelo cut him off.

Leonardo resisted, but Mikey insisted it would be proof that Karai had failed to destroy the bond of trust between them, so he complied.

Mikey opened a bottle and Leo noticed it was a praline pecan and cream scented massage oil.

“Where did you get that?” the leader asked, trying to not flinch as Mikey straddled him. Damn, his brother was now heavy. 

“I bought it earlier. Relax…” Mikey spreading it on his hands before running his hand on Leo’s biceps. “Don’t you think it smells good? I could eat you up!” 

Leonardo, despite all the dexterity of his brother’s hands, couldn’t help thinking. Mikey had revealed parts of his captive life, but it was now more puzzling than ever. Then he wondered if his present docility fueled Mikey’s weird idea. He had to make Mikey speak about his exact feelings towards him, so he could make him see the absurdity of them. But as gently as a mother scold his kid to have stolen flowers on a tombstone for her.

“I know you came in my room last night,” the leader started.

“It wasn’t my intention to be discreet,” Mikey replied shamelessly.

Startled, Leo turned his head the best he could, despite Mikey pressing a very pleasuring spot on his neck.

“What? You knew I was awake and you have ... “

“You’re not ready, I won’t force you, but I don’t want you to forget my interest in you. I want to make you mine. It’s an animal thing, I couldn’t help myself,” Mikey shrugged, as if was explaining that he didn’t have the choice to eat all the pizza.

Leo pushed him away with his hands.

“Mikey, this is insane. We are not animals!”

Before he could react, Mikey seized one of Leo’s hands and cuffed it to his bed. The cuff had been hidden all along by the pillow. He was so stunned that Mikey used his shock and his more massive size to cuff the second hand.

“Michelangelo! How could you? I trusted you,” the leader growled mad at Mikey’s betrayal and at himself to have let his guard down for a few tears. Mikey had always cried easily. 

“Calm down. I just want to watch you as yesterday but this time with the light.” Mikey stood up and take a few steps back. “See, no fucking, no kissing.” Mikey had dropped down at some moment and was obviously planning to jerk off on Leo chained to his bed. The leader tugged on his restrains furiously.

“Relax, sweetie. I do nothing more than yesterday. It calms me down and it doesn’t hurt you. Ask Donnie; rape victims need to get back to their normal sex life in a graduated way. Being able to do that will helps me heal.” Mikey said, but Leo felt it was bullshit. “You are the person I trust Leo the most and I love you deeply. I need you to help me.”

It didn’t calm Leo.

“No, Mikey, if you’ve mental or sexual issues, Donnie has the solution, not me ...”

“I thought you were the leader, Leo? You want to decide about the grocery errands, but you don’t want to deal with my trauma? No, don’t answer! You talk too much…”

Mikey took an object from his drawer and tried to gag him with it. To the hell with it, Leo thought and if he didn’t scream to not awake Raph, he kicked Mikey hard with his free leg. But it wasn’t enough to get Mikey coming back to his sense. They started to fight, but with only his legs free, it was easiest for Mikey to overpower and push the gag in his mouth.

“I’m sorry, Leo. But I need this and I don’t want Donnie or Raph to come back to interrupt us. I wouldn’t hurt you. You might even like that…but no kick anymore.” 

It was now evident that Mikey’s errand was to buy restraint and other kinky stuff as he tied Leo’s spread legs to the bed.

Mikey started pumping his cock with more energy and Leo turned his head, disgusted. He also tried to ignore the delusional speech of Michelangelo. The other whispered to him how beautiful Leo was, detailing everything he loved about the leader, from the green of his skin to the gray-blue of his eyes.

Seeing that Leo was doing his best to ignore him, he straddled the leader’s chest, his hard cock a few inches from his face. Leo couldn’t help but smell the very musky smell of Mikey, without stopping to breathe.

As he sat on his brother, jerking off so close that his knuckles brushed against Leo’s face, Mikey twisted his body and used his other hand to caress the leader’s crotch.

“You fucked me to make me feel better. I need you thousandfold more right now, Leo. We will go at your own pace, step by step ...I can make you feel good... I’m a skilled lover. I made the Foot slut scream with pleasure. I imagined that it was you and my hips had a mind of their own.”  
To give weight to his sentence, Mikey made a lascivious movement with his pelvis, brushing the bulge Leo couldn’t prevent to form in his lower plastron.  
“Let yourself go, you’ve already done it. It was good, right? And now, I’m better ... I jerked off so many guys thinking of you ... dreaming at this moment ... Their taste was almost good, because I remembered yours ... I’m dying to taste you again.”

Despite the leader's willpower, the hand and the dirty talk were making their effect on him. Leo couldn’t stop his cock from going out and Mikey changed position to grab their two cocks together, uttering praise about how a good boy Leo was.

Tied up, gagged and his pride refusing to let him saw in this shameful state by their other brothers, Leo was dragged despite him in the lust. To lie on his shell, having nothing to do but to experience pleasure was too easy. He didn't even have to feel guilty because he had no way to get out or to speak reason to Mikey. It was a dangerous new sensation than giving up control. Leonardo stopped resisting, letting himself being wrapped and lost in the intoxicating pleasure.

They reached climax almost at the same time, spilling over Leo’s breastplate. Mikey fell like a stone on Leo, panting.

“Shit, I was itchy for it for so long.” Mikey glanced up, his eye glazed by the afterglow. “Don’t tell me it wasn’t feeling good?”

Leo groaned behind the gag and Mikey removed it gently.

The ability to speak again made the realization of what had occurred fell down on Leo Leo while his younger brother tried to kiss him. Shame overwhelmed him to have been that weak. He had failed to make his point across. Even more, he had encouraged Mikey by his docility. He had been really surprised by the cuff but Mikey could protest Leo refused to fight him because he wanted this. Leo couldn’t deny either to have felt pleasure. 

“Mikey… if you need sex that much, maybe Donnie could consider it. He seems to be open to this option.” What was happening in his brothers' bedroom didn’t matter to him. If Don and Mikey could be happy, Leo won’t prevent them to do whatever they liked. “I think Don could be a good partner for you.”

Mikey’s features twisted in anger.

“How dare you bring Donnie up after he kissed you?” he hissed. “I should punish you for that! You are lucky that I am a softy and that I want you to love me back.”

“Mikey, for the last time, there will be no relationship between us! Your jealousy is unfounded.” Leonardo insisted as firmly as he could with cum splattering his plastron. To hear Mikey talking about a punishment was taking the cake. 

“Why? You proposed I have one with Don!” Mikey retorted. Do you want to stick me with Donnie because Raph is the one you want?” he demanded to know.

“What I want is that you untie me and let me go wash and sleep in my room.”

To Leo’s surprise, Mikey untied him without arguing.

“Why do you look so amazed?” Mikey snapped. “I told you I won’t force you. You’re not a prisoner. You want to leave so get the fuck out!” he shouted, his voice thick with emotion.

Leo hesitated. Mikey had massaged him and jerked him off. And right after he had come, Leo wanted to leave like Mikey was a cheap call-girl. He wanted to tell Mikey that despite what had happened, Leo still cherished him as his brother and except for the sex, he would do anything to help Mikey to heal and be happy. He hoped he doesn’t have to go that far that to explain WHY he refused for himself a relationship. 

“Mikey...” Leo began. “I don’t see you that way…” 

“Go away!” Mikey barked. 

The leader didn’t know what he could add and whatever he could find, Mikey wasn’t ready to hear it. So, Leonardo left as he had been told


	6. Chapter 6

A stop at the showers was a necessity. The icy water allowed Leo to regain his senses and wash away the evidence of his nightly activity. But the shame and the anger against himself were harder to wipe away.

He had been weak and had made things worse. He had given in to Mikey. It had been not even just kisses or some caresses. No! He had let Mikey make much more explicit gestures, despite promising to be firm in his refusal. How could he have let the situation degenerate to this point?

Don had asked him to win Mikey's trust. He told Leo to not confront him to get info in order to help for his recovery. But it was evident that despite having let Mikey having his way, he didn't earn any point. Mikey wasn't about to confide in him. When he left the room, his younger brother was furious and Leo couldn't blame him. He kept sending his younger brother mixed signals.

He turned off the shower faucet and put his forehead against the wet tiles. How to get out of this situation and help Mikey without damaging their brotherly bond?

He had to see Donatello and ask him for advice, but this time Leo had to be honest and told him the full story. He thought briefly about the scientist's kiss. It probably didn't mean anything. Donnie had wanted to experiment a kiss to check if what Mikey had suggested between them could be possible. Trying on Raphael first would have got Donatello punched. Don felt nothing for him at all, and it was a relief. After having played indifferent, Mikey had thrown a jealous tantrum as soon as they were alone. Hadn't he even gone so far as to talk about punishing him? And what about his insults? But later, Mikey didn't insult him at all. Leo's mind recalled him some of the praise and words from adoration he had heard. It was so embarrassing, he immediately stopped thinking about it. 

Now that his body was clean, at least, Leo headed to his bedroom. But the sleep was long to come and the leader stared at the ceiling, his thought racing.

The more he thought about it, the more it seemed to be a daddy issue. Mikey had been abandoned, just like them, by their father. It was normal that Mikey was distraught. Hadn't he started to be gloomy since Leo officially took over? Knowing that Splinter wasn't coming back must have been hard on Michelangelo. Especially after the trauma of his captivity. Mikey only turned to him because Leo was the next best thing, a father replacement. He didn't have to look any further, Leo decided. It was the only thing making sense.

Love, he had known for a long time, wasn't for him. He had given up all hope of it two years ago. He closed his eyes, hoping to be able to sleep, despite his tormented conscience.

Leo stirred on his bed, still half asleep, when he noticed the time. There must have been a power outage, seeing the 12:00 displayed. He got up and put on his gear in a hurry, having no idea what time it was. His biological clock usually woke him up at 5:25 am, 5 minutes before the time set on his alarm clock, but he was so tired, having slept so little lately that it might be later. He thought back to the events of the day before and wondered with worry how Mikey would act today. His little brother was now so unpredictable. The leader hoped that neither Raph or Don heard Mikey's screams. But Raph was a heavy sleeper and Don often slept in his soundproofed lab. It was unlikely they heard, Leo told himself.

The relative brightness and the animation coming from the kitchen showed him that it was much later than 5:25 am.

"Ah! This is our Sleeping Beauty," Michelangelo smiled. "Come sit down Leo, the next one is for you."

The leader slid into a chair.

"What time is it? We got a power outage?"

Donatello replied his mouth full that Mikey blew out the circuit breaker with his waffle iron and that it was 8:55.

Raph, who had foreseen Leo's start at the time, put a soothing hand on his bicep.

"Relax, Fearless. We have no training, today. It's supposed to be Christmas, you forgot? Then, sleeping late for once in your life isn't biggy, you know?"

Mikey put the waffle under the nose of Leo, with fresh fruit, syrup and cream. A lavish breakfast, like they never had. There was an abundance of strawberries on his plate. He notices that Raph, who loved them almost as much, only had two on his plate, compared to him, who had at least ten more. But what was more concerning is that there no way those strawberries had been thrown in the garbage. They were bright red. But he wouldn't fight Mikey over fruits after what had occurred between them. 

"It looks delicious, Mikey," Leonardo commented carefully. "Thank you."

The young mutant leaned over and gave him a chaste kiss on the cheek. It was a brotherly one, not at all like those of the night before.

"Don't mention it. The pleasure is mine. Merry Christmas, big brother.

Then Mikey sat in front of him, smiling.

"Aren't you eating?" Raphael questioned while pouring half the bottle of syrup on his waffle.

"I'm not hungry."

Immediately, the concern showed of the three elders' features. Mikey not being hungry was a red flag in itself. It hadn't happened three times in his life and always in exceptional circumstances where Mikey was extremely unhappy about something. Yet he smiled. As Donnie and Raph shrugged and resumed eating, Leo began to scrutinize Michelangelo carefully.

Leonardo knew that he could make his look intimidating, to melt stone, Mikey complained in the past. The youngest was the most sensitive to it, bursting into tears and admitting all his sins before his big brother usually opened his mouth. So he put all the strength of his will in his eyes, wanting to crack Mikey's front, whether it was prudent or not. However, this one maintains his gaze without wavering, his blue eyes like two lakes of indifference. It's like the day before never happened, and suddenly the leader wondered if Mikey didn't have a split personality or if he was delusional.

Mikey must have noticed his wonder, because he made a sort of grin.

"Maybe I'll let myself be tempted ..." he began, advancing his hand towards Leo's plate. Leonardo smiled, thinking that Mikey's hunger strike whim had been short-lived, but his satisfied look faded when Mikey, after dipping his finger in the whipped cream, pulled it out to lick and suck on it sensually, without taking your eyes off the leader.

Leo looked back at his plate, his cheeks burning. He should not pay special attention to Michelangelo and his antics. Anyway, he didn't know how to act with him, worried that Mikey snaps at any moment. To give himself a composure, he took half of his strawberries and offered them to Raphael.

"Here, Raph. I have too many, I know you love them too."

He continued chatting with Raphael and Donnie but was careful to include Mikey too. This one was giving him a hard time, remaining silent. Suddenly, stiffly, Mikey left the table and placed a package, right in front of Leo.

"Your gift."

Intrigued, the leader looked up.

"To me? But why immediately? We don't open them until midnight, right?" the leader protested, embarrassed. What if something was compromising or questionable inside?

"This is your morning gift. You have others to open later."

Leo saw the tension in Mikey's shoulders and understood: his little brother wanted to have his attention again, jealous Leo was talking to their brothers. He sighed. Mikey somehow was pitiful. He yielded, under the protests of the two others who complained of having nothing, them.

"You know, Leo is very special to me ..." was Mikey's response, which the other two seemed to accept as weird it was.

After having unwrapped his present, Leo was reassured: It wasn't a weird gift. It was a beautiful cast iron teapot with a matching goblet. Since the disappearance of Master Splinter, Leo didn't want to use the tea service of their Sensei, contenting himself with an electric kettle. So Mikey's present made sense. On the other hand, the leader had qualms about accepting a gift offered with the dirty money from a criminal organization. But refusing was another outrage against Michelangelo.

The teapot was a much more acceptable tribute than a comment about his 'fine ass' as Mikey had put it.

He thanked and got up to wash the teapot and fill it with water to boil it. Once done, he declared suffering from a terrible headache. Since the training was canceled, he would go drink tea in front of a book in his room and meditate. Mikey may well have planned what he wanted for this so-called Christmas, Leo remained the leader. He wanted to spare Mikey's feelings, but he would not be controlled by him, from 9 am in the morning to bedtime.

But deep down, he knew, the truth was that he wanted to avoid Michelangelo. His interactions with their brothers seemed to shake Mikey and even displease him. Leonardo was certainly not going to stop talking to Donnie or Raph, but by staying in his room, he minimized the risks. It wasn't the Fearless Leader's style to hide from the danger, but the threat had never presented itself under the youthful features of Michelangelo.

Tonight, since there would really be a family party, Leo could not remain locked, but the rest of the day, he could do so without appearing rude. He was going to go out, drink and eat at noon in the kitchen, make here and there an act of presence, to dispel suspicions that something was wrong.

Mikey, at Leo's announcement about his headache, didn't overreact.

"Oh, then, we won't watch Games Of Thrones, we will wait until you feel better, Leo. Anyway, I have an important thing to do, which I postponed too much." Mikey took a deep breath." I'll write down in my diary what had happened. It might take me the rest of the morning ... it's tough to think back about it... but I think it might do me some good."

Enthusiastic, all fears and doubts gone, Leo nodded:

"It's a great idea, Mikey. This can only help you in your healing process! Isn't it Donnie? "

Donatello glanced up and articulated slowly, with skepticism:

"Yes, undoubtedly ... "

But Leo, quite relieved, didn't care. He put his arm over his little brother's shoulders, the events of last night, forgotten.

"I'm very proud of you, Mikey. It will be painful, but you will probably feel much better afterward."   
Mikey smiled, gently pressing the leader's hand as he grabbed his shoulder.

"Oh yes, Leo, I'm sure everything will be better after…"

***  
Finding the diary had been easy. Mikey hadn't changed his hiding place. He had then sneaked back in his room to meditate, or it was the reason he gave. Leo opened the notebook eagerly to find the last entry. Maybe finally he would understand what was happening with his little brother. 

  
_September 15,_   
_Dear Clark,_   
_Been a while, right? You'll see, I am no longer the naive turtle that I was ten months ago. Far from there. I feel like 50 years have passed since the last time ..._   
_I have to tell you about something challenging. I don't want to do it, but Leo seems to think it's important and I want to do everything to please him. I'm going to tell you about my imprisonment._   
_I got mistaken for my brother. I had Leo's bandanna on me at the time. It was a lucky charm for me, so it was in my obi. When I knew that Leo was in danger, I didn't hesitate. I put on the bandanna, to confuse them until I got back-up._   
_I got caught because of Donnie's damn voice assistant when I wanted to use the GPS._   
_On my own, I was no match. They took me and I woke up tied up. Karai was furious because she had plans for my big brother. She wanted him badly and so, she took revenge on me for her disappointment._   
_She said that I sacrificed myself in vain for Leo because he didn't give a damn about me and that when she finished with me, I would hate him for all the pain that I would have to bear. I can't tell too much chronologically from that point on. I lost track of time._   
_They started drugging me and changed my cell several times, just to disorient myself, I suppose. Sometimes I would wake up in a lab, tied up. Or, in the Dojo, to fight opponents, for my life. Or in a sort of throne room where I was repeatedly raped in front of Karai._   
_They put me a collar that could kill me remotely with a detonator. Even the lowest rank soldier had a remote that could shock me to death. If I wasn't a satisfying sexual partner, I would be killed, they said. I don't know if it was true or only scammers to scare me. They tested a lot of toys on me, which I had never seen in Raph's magazines._   
_I have nothing against kinky sex. With the right partner, it must be more interesting, but a DP-I just realized that the initials of Deadpool make DP. I wonder if it was wanted?- with two mutants twice my size don't make my motor running, you know? I focused a lot on Leo at the time, but it was extremely difficult to bear. Because I knew sex with Leo wouldn't feel like that at all._   
_They whipped me, tied me up, sliced me, and burnt me._

At its point, Leo had to take a breather to not howl.

_There was even a scientist who wanted to remove my shell. But Karai's scheme didn't work. I focused on my bandana, and I thought that Leo was thinking of me somewhere. There were times when I thought I was going to stay there and go mad with pain or just die. My biggest regret was that I didn't tell Leonardo how I loved him. Yes, I told him, but he didn't understand that I was really serious. Maybe I was going to die and Leo would never know how much he meant to me._

_I believe that this experience, so close to death, made my feelings mature. My love confession was a bit messy, I didn't know exactly what I wanted, ten months ago. But, I got an Epiphany. I think I was passed out, after being badly battered by FootBots, then I saw the light, as one should see before death. And there I saw what I was going to regret in my life: I never knew what being loved by Leo was. I was going to die without waking up in his arm and have morning sex. I was going to die without him having dozed on my laps during a movie. We never got to make love and I had missed my life. But it seems that this realization gave me strength: I wanted to live to know all its things. And I wanted to make Leo lives them too._   
_So I resisted._   
_I'm too tired to tell you about how I could escape this hell. Thinking about it reminds me too much of how disappointed I am right now._   
_Leo doesn't give a damn. Okay, he must have been worried sick while I was missing. I bet he beat himself up a lot. But when he looks at me, he sees only his fragile and confused little bro he needs to spare since he was tortured. He doesn't seem to know that I have an adult body, adult emotions and adult experiences. I'm fed up that he sees me as weak or a child he needs to protect. I think I had proven I could take care of myself and even, defend him, since I got abducted and tortured for his sake. He looks at me like I was hurt or ill when he is the one looking about to collapse. Leo is too stressed to make us believe we are doing fine when he is himself so depressed. I can give him pleasure like he never had and the consideration he deserves. I will give him my full attention, in the bedroom as well as outside._   
_Before, I wanted Leo's attention because I was seeing him as a superhero. But I had seen that his super ninja power has limits because he couldn't save me. Or was Karai right to say that I wasn't worth it?_   
_Don't get me wrong, I always admire him, but there, I don't respect the great skills of a big brother or a leader. I admire the hard roundness of his muscles. The sensuality of his gait or his voice..._   
_Why can't he see the bright shade of my skin or the particular color of my eyes? Or my bouncy ass? For a mutant, I'm pretty cute, I know that. Yesterday, I could have given him pleasure, a much higher pleasure, if he had let me take control. But he doesn't trust me ... Karai was right ... I am so disappointed, Clark, that I regret not having died there, in my cell. At least I will have already stopped suffering…_

Leonardo skipped a few paragraphs. It was mostly lamenting about his indifference. He didn't want to be surprised, red-handed with his little brother's diary. Towards the end, Michelangelo was ridiculing that Leonardo, for Christmas, was probably going to offer him an action figure or a comic when he really wanted the leader himself. The diary didn't teach him anything. He wasn't better informed about Mikey's captivity than before, but his denial phase was dying a slow death. To got that far than pick a lock and then, a fight, without forgetting sneaking in his bedroom at night to watch Leo sleeping, there was only one explanation: Mikey was serious or at least, he really believed what he claimed. He wasn't sure if Mikey was serious since before he went missing. Perhaps he wasn't at the time, but the detention and the torture made the fancy turn into an obsession.   
Michelangelo wanted Donnie with Raphael, obviously, for Leo to have no reason to refuse him. Four brothers, two couples.

But why him, precisely? Leo had nothing that set him apart from his brothers, except to be an authority figure, for what it worth. He wasn't the strongest, the smartest or the funniest. Mikey, all his life, had complained about Leo didn't know how to have fun? So why this new predilection? Was it only because he was Mikey's first? It was probably the only reason. He thought back of the feverish words about his skin, his muscles, his eyes. But Michelangelo had always had a propensity for exaggeration. Leo wasn't that handsome creature Mikey had described. He was as green as his brothers. If Mikey was into muscles, Raph had more. Anyway, whatever the reason was, it wasn't important. Mikey felt strongly about him and had decided he would get Leo to accept him as a lover, even if Leo had several reasons to not be.  
The first was that he had never considered a romantic relationship with one of his brothers. He wanted to offer Michelangelo relief for his feverish libido. He had seen Raphael, then Donatello take this route: try to approach someone and bite the dust, hopeless to find another person to love one day. The character of his other brothers had considerably soured since then. He had wanted to save Michelangelo and offer himself as a pale substitute, better than the absolute zero of their options.  
At first, he welcomed his initiative. Mikey seemed to appreciate the contact and likewise, his mood improved. To make the experience less confusing, Leo had suggested that Mikey turn off the light and call him another name. But Mikey's insistence on having the light on and on calling him Leo should have given him a hint. Michelangelo was comfortable with the concept of incest, much more so than Leo himself, in fact.  
Whatever they were related by blood or not, they had been raised this way and Leo found it twisted. Plus, it wasn't just about him and Mikey. What about Raph and Don? What would they do? He didn't see Raph with Don any more than he saw Mikey with him. Wouldn't feel forced to hook up together to not stay like leftover? In their tight dynamics, they couldn't afford arguments or worse, break-ups. Leo didn't even want to think about the lair's atmosphere, following a break-up between them. Leo was sensible enough to maintain normal relationships with everyone, but whoever his partner was, he was sure that the reverse wasn't true.  
No winning combination could come out, the more the leader thought about it. And, if he had to choose absolutely from one of his brothers to be into a relationship, he had to admit that Mikey wouldn't be his first pick. Since he had always posed as a parental figure for the youngest, their relationship seemed doubly twisted.  
But Mikey seemed to want him as a partner, despite that. Daddy issues or not, the fact was it seemed to have to be Leo. Pushing him towards another brother would not solve the solution, for now. But for Mikey to drop it, he had to get what he wanted first.  
Mikey's whole youth was full of examples where the youngest had to have something and then turn away from it, once he got it. Each time, Mikey had been sincerely convinced of the necessity of obtaining the thing in question, whatever the trifle of the moment was.  
So he had no choice. In order for Mikey to move on, he had to give in. He was trying to reason and convince himself. He already had. It was not painful, at all, even pleasant at the limit, notwithstanding the fear that his two other brothers would discover the secret. It might help him relax as well as satisfy Mikey. In fact, there weren't negative points to explain its resistance.  
Except that he wasn't in love with Mikey, not even attracted. Because what Leo was really into wasn't a male mutant turtle. Even less one when he had wiped the running nose and potty-trained.  
The hour was advancing. It was nearly 6 pm and his brothers were waiting for him for dinner. He had heard the noise coming from the kitchen. Michelangelo had to prepare a feast. He wasn't hungry, but he would make an effort not to offend his little brother. After all, he was ready for much more.  
He still didn't know how he was going to tell his little brother about his consent. They were rarely alone. Sneak into his room again? It was probably the only option.  
Meanwhile, his brothers didn't stay idle. The brothers had installed that Christmas tree before Mikey's disappearance. Under the tree, only the presents from Leonardo and Donatello were packed. Raphael was known as a last-minute mutant and so was Mikey. Each of them competed not to be the last, and often Raphael, carried away by stress, bought anything rather than having his presents ready after Michelangelo's. Leo noticed new packages, wrapped in metallic blue, red and purple paper. These were, therefore, Michelangelo's presents for his brothers. But Raphael, this year was the last. It must be said in defense of the turtle that, with Mikey's disappearance, he had hardly had time to think of something futile like Christmas gifts.  
But this time, Leo told himself, Raph wasn't the only one. After reading the diary, where Mikey made fun of the present surely offered by his big brother, Leo could not offer him the action figure and the horror comic he bough about a year ago. He had to find something else, and quickly.  
Despite all his goodwill, the stress of the situation cut his appetite. It seemed to him that Mikey was devouring alive with his gaze. He didn't participate in the hollow conversation. Raphael was anxious and had to find a plausible excuse to go out and find presents for his brother. But Mikey, unwittingly, gave him one.  
"After the meal, I have to go out. I need to get some fresh air and be alone. Don't worry about the dishes, I'll do it tomorrow."  
Leo made eye contact: What did this sudden need for solitude mean? The day chosen by Michelangelo to be Christmas, in addition. Usually, Mikey was overexcited and kept harassing his brothers for "opening the gifts earlier this year." But today it wasn't the case. Mikey seemed cool and in control like he was the one in charge. Perhaps because it wasn't really Xmas or simply because now Mikey's personality had been too altered by his traumatic experience with the Foots.   
"Why? And where are you going?" Leonardo asked sharply.  
"Why do you want to know that? You're not my boyfriend!" Mikey sneered. "It's not like you are going to miss me!"  
Leo was about to get angry. He wasn't used to be talked back this way, even less when his question was relevant. But Raphael put his hand on his arm. They shared a quick glance with Donnie. He had to give Michelangelo enough rope to hang himself with.They will quickly get to know what this sudden need for solitude meant by tailing him.  
Leo, therefore, let it go. Anyway, he had to go out himself, to find another present for Michelangelo.  
At the end of the meal, Mikey announced that he would jog in the sewers. Leo nodded, figuring that he could possibly follow him. He was about to get up when Raphael held him back:  
"Leo, I have to talk to you. It's urgent ".  
Leo stared at his brother, taken aback at the somewhat excited look of his immediate younger brother.  
"Go ahead, I'm listening to you."  
"I found what I could offer Mikey, but I need your help."  
Raphael rarely asked for help and Leonardo still me. Curious, he signaled to his brother that he had his full attention and to continue:  
"I told myself that Mikey would find nothing cooler as a gift than ... revenge. We go to the surface, we find five or six Foots soldiers and we kill them. You cut off their heads and we put it in a pretty box! We can even write on the label that it is also from you! What do you think?" Raph asked, eyes bright with excitement.  
Leo paled slightly. Raphael, really, sometimes had the way of thinking of a psychopath. But the idea wasn't all bad. Their father's first precepts about the good and evil lost some of their sense since their father's disappearance. Leonardo's moral conscience became elastic. Donnie's cold anger and Raphael's burning rage sometimes reached the leader, like a virus. He needed to let off steam. Even more on those who had hurt Mikey so much and turned him into his wrecked being lusting for his own brother. But severed head seemed a little over the top. They could settle for badges, right?  
"Raph, there are good elements in your idea. But, I warn you, we haven't seen Foots for more about a year. If we don't find a Foot soldier, you can't use a civilian as a substitute."  
Raph shrugged and mumbled that of course, he wasn't Jack the Ripper.  
Leo, reassured, went to sharpen his katanas.  
  
  



	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> no beta

He and Raph had reached a compromise. Instead of cutting off their heads, Raph agreed to only cut out the skin on which the Foot emblem was tattooed. It was creepy, but no more disturbing than what was going on in Michelangelo's head recently. There was a time where Leo would have opposed to such free violence. But reading Mikey's diary and seeing the damage done in his soul, body and mind had made Leo need to find an outlet. Then, their death had been rapid. Nothing to do with the tortures that Mikey had suffered. The leader agrees with his second: they were lenient, much more than what these scum deserved. Mikey would see that his brothers had cared to avenge him. It was undoubtedly a weird Christmas present, but this very Christmas was special. Did not Mikey ask for more mature and virile gifts? This should satisfy him.

After seventeen tattoos, Leo offered to stop. Mikey was about to turn seventeen years old. Raph, anyway, didn't seem to have as much fun as he had at first. He looked concerned while slicing the last tattoo with his tanto, to put it in the cool box they brought.

"Fearless, have you ever thought about what Mikey said?"

Leo frowned; what Raph was referring to?

"You know, what he said about me and Don."

"Oh! That…" Leo glanced away, unsure about what to say.

"I think about it and I say to myself that, why not ... You're supposed to be the leader. What do you think?"

"It is not a decision to be taken lightly." Leo disapproved the idea, but felt hypocrite after what he did. But from another side, his brothers' happiness was important. If Raph really wanted to take this way and Don was okay with it, Leo can't do a thing except warning them about its danger. He was the leader, but refused to tell them what to do in their love life. But then, how to ignore Mikey's demand, then? It would be tenfold hard. But Leo decided he couldn't be selfish about this. He won't deny Raph to be happy because of his own issues. "Taking this path makes it impossible to go back. It will forever change your relationship with Donatello. You know how he been hurt in the past, by April. If you change your mind, for whatever reason, Don may be hurt all over again. He could play cold, but he is very sensitive."

In a rush to finish this conversation, Leo closed the cool box and stood up, ready to leave. But Raphael slammed his hand on the brick wall of the alley to prevent Leo from walking away. 

"Who said I was speaking about Don?"

Leo froze, his heart racing faster. Perhaps, Raphael implied Michelangelo. It could fix everything. Michelangelo could be flattered to be desired. That Raph had a robust libido was evident. Mikey and Raph could let off their carnal desires together. 

Cautiously, Leo made his answer;

"Mikey is still fragile. I don't believe that starting a romantic relationship is wise after such a trauma. Perhaps you should wait for a few months."

"Stop playing hard to get. You know I'm talking about you, moron!"

No wonder Casey had smashed his hockey stick on Raph's shell if he confessed in such a blunt way.

"I'm not talking about love and stuff," Raph was starting to get flustered and Leo guessed it had asked him a great deal of courage to say that much. "You don't want to mess up your team, Sun Tzu. I got it. I just want to try this!" Now Raph was starting to get angry. "I want to feel another hand than mine! Don't you want to die an absolute virgin? I'm sure as hell I don't want to!"

Leo couldn't reply he wasn't one. 

"Why me?" he asked. "Mikey and Donnie have hands, too."

"I know you will shut up about it and no making fun of me if I suck at this!" Raph retorted. 

Leo's mind went full speed. Raph was his most susceptible likely and also most dangerous brother to offend. If he hesitated even too much, Raph would get upset, then mad, then all rampage on any random people he could cross. Then, hadn't he promised Mikey the same thing? Come to think of it, he even preferred the sincere and straightforward way that Raph expressed his desire to him. Raphael wasn't cunning. Besides, Donnie got a kiss, too. It wasn't fair Raph had nothing. If he learned that Leo had told him no and had said yes to the other two, he would question himself and get angry and make trouble.

"Okay, Raph," Leo yielded. "What exactly do you want?"

"Just a glimpse of what it can be. When I have had enough, I would tell you," Raph replied, his eyes shining with lust.

Leo shook his head.

"Not when you have had enough. I'll leave you 10 minutes. It's Christmas and I don't want to keep the others waiting."

Half an hour later, Leo and Raph entered the lair, Raph proudly holding the box. Donnie and Mikey were in the living room, both visibly nervous.

Michelangelo rose, clearly mad.

"What the hell were you doing, huh? It's too much to ask you to come back on time at Christmas!" 

Raph was in a too good mood to read the atmosphere, held out the cool box to Mikey.

"Don't be an ungrateful little shit! Leo and I, we worked hard this year for your gift. It's kind of homemade, but I bet you will like it!"

Mikey wasn't sharing Raph's enthusiasm, obviously and stared at his eldest brother.

"It's uncommon as a present, but you will surely appreciate it," Leo said.

Mikey's eyes expressed suspicion while Raph urged him to open it. He must have been wondering why his gift was in a cooler.

"It's okay, it's okay, I'll open it ... yours are under the tree."

The disappointment marked the features of Raphael, who liked to give. But refusing to let his mood change, he joined Donnie.

Suddenly Leo second-guessed their idea. Maybe Mikey wouldn't appreciate the sight of blood. He regretted not having asked for Donnie's medical advice before granting Raph's request.

As he leaned toward the metallic blue package, a cry of horror confirmed his suspicions. Concerned, he turned around to notice that, strangely, Mikey didn't seem traumatized, but angry. Angry like Leo had never seen him.

"Dumbass!" he shouted at Raph and Leo rushed to stand between the two of them to prevent the younger one from getting into his hands.

"Calm down, Raph only wanted to avenge you, like me, so that you can see that we won't let the harm done to you unpunished."

Mikey muttered something indistinct and Leo looked down. The contents of the box had spilled on the floor and, finally, seeing the scraps of flesh, Leo concluded that the youngest's reaction was understandable. It was indeed disgusting and Mikey, now, must hate the violence. So he leaned over to pick up what was so bothering the youngest and hide it from his sight.

"Why do you have Raph's fingerprints on your ass, Leo?" Mikey's voice was clipped. "Don't deny it! There are 3 bloody fingers! And the hands of this psychopath are still stained with blood," he squeaked with resentment and disgust.

Leo didn't have time to say anything. Raph burst in anger. To be called "psychopath" when he wanted to please, was too much for his fiery character.

"Okay, I groped him. So what? Skinning these bastards turned me on, then you put this idea in my head! I didn't force him and we're big boys. We can do what we want. Do you have a problem with that?" Raph exclaimed, furious.

Leonardo's heart pounded in his throat as he carefully studied the faces of his brothers, Mikey and Donnie. Especially Mikey, because, for his part, the genius had only an air of curiosity. The youngest's face twisted in a grin that gave Leo the chill.

"Not at all, Raph. You're right." Do his other brothers noticed how insincere Mikey sounded?" I spoke about it first. I can't call you off for being curious. Abstinence doesn't fit big 18 years-old mutant guy."

If Raph seemed glad that it was now in the open and no one was grossed out, Leo wasn't fooled by Mikey's reply. He hadn't said anything to Donnie the other day, but when Mikey had been alone with him, his younger brother had expressed his jealousy very clearly. And Donnie had only kissed him.

"You got a try today and Donnie kissed Leo yesterday. I think Leo has done the guinea pig enough for the two of you. It's my turn, now."

The leader's head snapped toward Mikey. What did he mean? Mikey had MUCH more than Raph and Don, but of course, the other two ignored him.

"Don't you have a lover?" Donnie sneered.

Mikey shrugged.

"I'm mad at him, I need to let off some steam" he commented to the great amusement of the two others who rolled their eyes, obviously believing Mikey had a screw loose.

Mikey took a step closer, very confident Leo wouldn't deny him anything. Indeed, Leo was caught. Refusing Mikey after having allowed Raph some touching would make the youngest upset and it was an understatement. Mikey didn't even hesitate and cup the firm buttocks of the leader before openly playing tonsil hockey. Don and Raph made some comments and chuckled, but they sounded more embarrassed than anything. Of course, they never expected to see such a show.   
But Leo felt their voices reaching him from far away, Mikey's hands and lips were taking the first seat in his mind. It wasn't anything like Raph. Earlier, Raph had been experimental and clumsy in his eagerness to have a consenting body to touch all over. But Mikey wasn't the same. He could be the baby bro, he was much more experienced than Raph or Donnie. It was like Mikey exactly knew what he was doing, expecting a reaction for any spot he touched and never being wrong. It was troubling to think that if Mikey had improved so much, it had been when he had been missing, because before that he was an excited puppy like Raph. For the first time, Leo wondered if Mikey's whole story wasn't a lie; if he never got prisoner at the Foot in the first place. Maybe Mikey just left as a means to guilt him and bring Leo to accept him as a sexual partner? It wasn't making any sense. The Mikey he knew could stay away for about ten months, all alone, without any money, with the unique goal to break Leo's balls. It was insane.

The kiss in his neck turned a possessive bite, bringing Leo back to reality. 

"Tonight, you will pay me back for this," Mikey whispered.

At these words, Leo disengaged himself and shoved away Mikey hard.

"That's enough, Michelangelo, with your antics." No one has heard the threat but Leo was incensed Mikey had dared that much. "Now, it's even!" he declared, glaring at Mikey. It wasn't even a bit, but what Leo knew it that it was over. He had been ready to surrender once, for Mikey to move on, but he refused to be groped in public and threatened. "If whatever curiosity took any of you, deal with it on your own!"

He sat down again, near Donatello, as nobly as he could, although each brother now knew that he had been their guinea pig for each of them. Mikey handed him his present, looking remorseful, but Leo put it aside, his mood sour.

"I'll unwrap it when I find another gift that satisfies you, Mikey," he said, icily.

The youngest gave him an encouraging smile: "I'm sure you will find something nice, bro! I'm not that hard to please. Just not into gore, you know. I never had been."

Leo stared straight ahead, without seeing anyone, opening nothing himself while Don and Raph unwrapped theirs. But suddenly, the silence that reigned in the room woke him from his trance.

Don and Raph, each a few feet apart, held what appeared to be a Polaroid photo. Strangely, Donnie didn't sneer about how Polaroid was archaic. The genius stared with fascination at the picture. Raph's expression was similar. Whatever it was, it seemed to surprise them as much as it pleased them.

This intrigued the leader. Raph and Donnie had seemed jaded of everything for a while.  
"What is that?" he asked, stretching his hand toward Donnie to take a look at the photo. Donatello jumped a yard backward, to get out of reach.

"It's personal," Donnie mumbled. He was looking at Mikey as if he had just done a Houdini escape act. Raph looked at the youngest the same way: a mix of admiration and recognition. Leo was dumbfounded: they never looked at him this way, even when he performed the more difficult kata or succeed in a mission. 

"I'm off," Raph said all of a sudden and Donnie nodded. "I'm following you, Raph, let me grab a few things in my lab."

Leo, more and more flabbergasted, finally found his words.

"What? Where are you going? You can't leave on your side, at Christmas!"  
Raph shrugged.

"This is the gift Mikey gives us. We have to go get it and we come back afterward, don't panic, Mom!"

"Maybe Leo has the same kind of gift, right?" Don suggested, turning to the youngest, questioning him.

Mikey shook his head.

"Nah! This year, I chose very personalized stuff… Leo is different. He has something different for him."

The reasoning seemed to make sense for Don and Raph, but not for the leader. He didn't like Mikey's smirk a bit.

"We don't go out alone, it's the new rule. If you go out, I coming with you!" Leo decreed, with an authoritarian voice.

"Come on, big brother, they won't be alone. They are two. On the other hand, if you go with them, I would remain alone. Are you going to abandon me again?" Mikey complained loudly.

But Leo saw it for what it was: emotional blackmail.

Mikey may have changed, but not to the point of fooling him. But Mikey continued before he could say anything.

"Besides, Raph and Don have nothing to fear. I stayed captive long enough to know it's you they want, bro. You're the only one with a bounty on your shell. But no need to be scared. To get at you, it would be over my dead body," he concluded, wrapping his arms around his brother. Leo stiffened, but Mikey acted as if he didn't realize it.

Donnie nodded,

"He's right, Leo. We are 19 and 18 years old, not helpless children. Raph and I can watch each other's back. And then, our whereabout concern only us. We have the right to get some privacy," Donatello countered dryly. "Let say it your gift to us," Don said carelessly, in his hurry to leave.

Raphael agreed.

"Yeah. You're the leader on the missions, but beyond that, we owe you nothing. Come on, Don, let's move."

Leo's face twisted in indignation. Raph, two hours ago, was begging to get a blow job and now, he "owed Leo nothing", not even respect! His cheeks flushed with anger he was about to give them a piece of his mind, but Mikey was indignant in his place.

"You jerk! You don't have to talk to Leo like that! I remind you that, more than once, he took care of you! Be respectful of him! He is the master here since Master Splinter left." Mikey's grin stretched as he had an ace in his sleeve. "Or, I could reconsider certain things."

"You're right, Mikey," Raph backed down immediately. "Sorry, Fearless."

Never Raph had apologized so quickly. Not for him. Not even in front of Master Splinter. Alarms went in Leonardo's mind, as Mikey waved to dismiss his other two brothers, while possessively tightening his grip on the leader with the other arm.

"We will be careful and be back before sunrise," Donnie threw over his shoulder, while quickly heading with Raphael towards the exit.

The leader nodded absentmindedly. The Polaroid picture had turned his brothers to Mikey's side. Since the departure of Master Splinter and, if he was honest, even before that, Don and Raph had started to be rebellious and more independent. On the other hand, Mikey had always shown him respect and obedience, notwithstanding the last two months or so. If he had someone he could more easily bribe, from his three brothers, to find out what was on the picture, it was Mikey. Anyway, Mikey was the one to be worried about and so Leo decided to let the others go. 

He suddenly noticed that Mikey had been massaging his shoulders for a while now, if he judged by the comfort he was beginning to feel.

"You are horribly tense, Leo. Forget them. You didn't open your gift. You'll love it. I had it made only for you," Mikey added, his breath tickling the hollow of his neck, making the leader shiver. Mikey's lips brushed his nape.

"What did you give to Raphael and Donatello?" Leo questioned abruptly to hide his confusion.

"Hmm? Well, nothing as great as what I gave you," Mikey replied nonchalantly, with a light kiss on his collarbone. Leo pulled away quickly.

"Stop fooling around and tell me the truth. He insisted. "I need to know where they are going! If something happens to them too, I ... "

"Did you notice that I ate nothing of the whole day?" Mikey replied bitterly. "You care about Raph and Don, but I could have stayed in my cell, as far as you are concerned!"

Leo refused to feel guilty, this time. Mikey was trying to manipulate him and sidetrack him. 

"No, Mikey, don't change the subject. Tell me this ... "

"Two whores. I paid them each a whore, with a room, "Mikey yielded. "It was their photos with the motel address. I told myself that if they were getting laid, they would stop chasing you," he explained sharply.

Leo said nothing, pondering. It made sense. Mikey, after all, seemed jealous. But, the photo had been in the gift box since BEFORE his return with Raph… The youngest could not have foreseen that Raph would fool around. Otherwise, knowing the youngest, Mikey would not have let Leo go out with Raph. He would have tagged along.

The prostitutes must have been beautiful for Don and Raph to rush that much. However, Raph had told him long ago not to be attracted to girl ... Maybe it was a male prostitute...But Leo wondered how much money Mikey could have spent on finding people willing to do a mutant. How much did he steal to the Foot? But maybe Leo was the one overthinking it. It could be two drug addicts, willing to do anybody for $30. But a room costed money too.

"Open yours," Mikey insisted, handing him the oblong package, his eyes shining with excitement.

Leonardo had no reason to oppose and was feeling drained. Mikey seemed to change his mood with each blink of an eye. After all, Mikey had gifted him with a teapot earlier, something harmless and now that he thought about it, Leo didn't thank him that much. He has to make up for it and he unwrapped the gift.   
His breath caught in his throat when he detailed the wonder in front of him. Excited, he removed the katanas from their midnight blue case. With a knowing eye, he took details of the steel.

"Mikey! These katanas are exceptional! How could you ..."

Leo started to calculate while turning the swords over. When it came to blade, he was an expert. These swords seemed to be authentic, coming from a famous forge in Japan. If Mikey had really made them for him, it must have taken about six or seven weeks, the time to forge and polish the blade ...They to get them shipped could have taken two more weeks. Which would mean that Mikey would have placed the order when he was still a prisoner, two months ago, admitting that Michelangelo had $10,000, which was absurd. Maybe he stole them. Karai loved ancient blades. Yet the cords of fine royal blue silk intertwining the handle was the same shade as his bandana. It actually seemed to be for him. Maybe Mikey had only added those? But it doesn't matter because these swords were somehow the fruit of a crime. But was it a crime to steal from criminals? Leo no longer knew without Master Splinter guidance. In their complete isolation, concepts of good and evil were blurred.

"You see this," Mikey said while taking the elder's hand to show him a silver lion motif on the top of the handle." It's for you. Because that's what you are, Leo, for me. A Lion King defending his little brothers," he explained with devotion and emphasis.

The allusion to the children's movie calmed the leader's concerns. Mikey was hugging him affectionately and touched by the words and the hug, Leo didn't investigate further. His little brother was so young, still a kid, and Leo felt his reservations melt. That the sword was stolen wasn't that important. Mikey's eagerness to please was.

"I have nothing to offer you comparable, Mikey. I am sorry. I should have looked for a real gift and not follow Raph in his idea," the leader apologized.

Mikey smiled.

"But you can, bro, give me a much more precious gift."

Leo raised his head and looked into the topaz blue gaze, to try to get a glimpse of Mikey's soul. It was easy to tell what Mikey wanted. In fact, Mikey wasn't even trying to be subtle. 

"You, that's what I want. I want to feel you again from the inside," he whispered. "Maybe it's the path to touch your heart."

Michelangelo's breath tickled Leo's skin again and his hand ran down.  
  
"We are alone. I guarantee you that Raph and Don won't be back before a good six hours. You can scream with pleasure. We can leave all the lights on. We can even do it here in the living room," Mikey suggested the youngest, with a seductive smile.

Leonardo stayed stiff, his face unreadable and stoic.   
Leo KNEW he had to surrender. Even before the katanas, he knew it. He had been in denial for a long time, but now postponing was impossible. For Mikey to move on, he had to give him what he wanted. Anyway, would it be so unpleasant? The main reason for his discomfort was gone. They were indeed alone for the night. But Leo didn't want to seem to give in too quickly and thus take away value from his surrender. Michelangelo had to grasp how a sacrifice it was and also lay down some basic rules.

"Mikey, I'm ready to give you what you want, but under certain conditions ..."

A smile formed on Mikey's face as if he had expected Leonardo's request and he made an encouraging gesture.

"I'm listening, Leo."

"You mustn't tell Donatello and Raphael. This is rule one." Leo was firm on this one.

Mikey shrugged, not surprised.

"No problem, bro. I wouldn't say anything to them."

"Okay, "Leo continued, nervous," Secondly, this is the only time. You should find yourself another passing fancy, afterward."

At that, Mikey frowned.

"You're not a passing fancy, Leo. And admitting that you still want me. I won't refuse you."

"I don't think it will happen," the leader replied, shaking his head gently.

"Why? I disgust you?" Mikey wanted to know, his eyes gleaming. But Leo didn't have time to reply that Mikey looked resolute and took a step forward, grabbing the leader's head to press his lips against his.

Leonardo was too surprised to resist and he gasped, letting his mouth open. Mikey took full advantage of the opening and caressed the sensitive sides of his shell, exactly as Leo liked. The leader's mind went blank and he cursed weakly his body so lewd.

When he needed air, Mikey pulled away, staring feverishly at his brother.

"Talking is wasting our precious alone time. I want you all mine before they came back. He gently took the older turtle's chin for another, softer kiss. Leo's lack of resistance was felt by the youngest as a green light. "It is a yes?"  
Leo didn't exactly nod, but he didn't shove Mikey away; neither said the opposite. Michelangelo's face lightened. 

"Don't worry, I'll be sweet. You won't feel any pain; only pleasure," Mikey promised, his voice trembling with excitement while rummaging in his obi, to take out a small bottle of lube.

At this sight, the leader stiffened. Mikey had expected he would give up. Leo's pride was revolted at the idea of having been manipulated so easily. Mikey had poked at all his weak points, using tenderness, threat, caresses, and Leo's guilt feeling against him. 

Mikey gently pushed him towards the couch, making him sit down while spreading the leader's thighs.

"Don't be like this," he murmured lovingly. "I will give you a very good time. "You never had one." Mikey was trailing his way up to Leo's groin with kisses. "Am I right?" he insisted, looking at the leader with half-closed eyes. "Have you ever received what I'm about to give you from someone else?" A flash of jealousy sparkled in Mikey's bright eyes while he gently rubbed the lower part of his brother's plastron.

Leo swallowed heavily and shook his head. He was too anxious to answer with words. The mute answer seemed to appease Michelangelo, turning him hornier, if it was possible.

"How about going out to play now?" the youngest suggested while licking his brother's crotch.

The leader relaxed his muscles to allow his cock to spring in the open and Mikey seized it, begging to give hard pulls on it. 

"Let yourself go. You have nothing to do than to stay there and take what I give you. You don't have to be the leader or take any responsibility. I have the situation in hand, you see? Mikey gave a harder pull on Leo's swollen cock. "Just let yourself be spoiled. You would maybe turn to get addicted to it."

"Look at me, Leo. We have the light on and I don't want you to close your eyes the whole time," Mikey demanded.

Leo obeyed without thinking not to, lowering his head to look at Mikey. He was rewarded with a tongue that languidly followed a vein the full length of its erect girth. Leo threw his head back with a loud moan, overwhelmed by a thrill of pleasure.

"Ah, Mikey ..."

"Yeah, say my name," Mikey encouraged, accelerating his hand movements before swallowing the hard cock with his mouth.

Leo bit his lips so as not to cry out loud again, even if they were alone and Michelangelo won't judge him. For the leader, that would be showing weakness and Splinter had told him that showing vulnerability was an opening for the enemy. Mikey wasn't his enemy, but he could let himself go to entirely. He knew Mikey would use it against him.

A cold contact started Leo.

"Easy." Mikey kissed the inside of his tight as a kind of apology. Meanwhile, his finger rubbed around Leo's entrance, spreading lube and relaxing the muscles. "It's cold, but you'll be hot, very hot, soon. And you will feel good, I promise you," Mikey said, kissing him again.

Carefully, Mikey breached him with a finger. The caution was necessary, as their fingers were large, much larger than those of humans. Leo arched his back again, under the pain of the intrusion.

"Easyyyyy," Mikey whispered again. "Calm down. Breathe. It will be fine. You see?" Mikey asked, sliding his entire finger back and forth. "I knew it was bullshit ... it was obvious that you were a virgin at the time and you got none since then," Mikey muttered before going down to add his tongue to his finger. Leo wasn't sure what Mikey means, but he was too caught up in the sensation to wonder. The feeling was becoming more and more pleasant. Thanks to Mikey's deep throat and the finger stroking his insides, Leo began to feel bubbling in the pit of his stomach a powerful orgasm.

"Close already, huh? Go ahead…" Michelangelo encouraged him before resuming to his ask with even more ardor.

"Mike ..." Leo yelled, falling over the edge, too overwhelmed with pleasure to have the strength to pronounce the last syllable.

Mikey wiped his mouth, greediness lit in his eyes.

"I like how you called my name ... Mikey sound too young. I'm no longer a kid. Call me Mike now. It will mark the turning point in our relationship." He raised his hand to untie his orange bandana. He commented while lubricating his cock swollen with impatience. "I'm taking off this. I don't want you to see me as your little brother or your little soldier. I want you to see the real me," he said, dropping the piece of orange cloth on the floor. "Your lover."

Leo no longer had the slightest will, reduced to a puddle of contentment. He opened his mouth anyway to argue what his brother had just said, but he only came out with a groan, as Michelangelo entered him, putting each of the leader's legs on his shoulders. Then, with a single push, he sank to the guard, with a strangled cry of satisfaction.

Leo had the impression that his eyes were going to spring from their orbit under the pressure, but Mikey remained, above him, leaning on his arms, waiting for his partner's body to adjust, monitoring his expression.

When the leader's facial muscles were more relaxed, Mikey made a tentative thrust, drawing a moan of pleasure. Encouraged, Mikey allowed himself to give free rein to his desire and was no longer afraid of hurting his brother.

He didn't have to scare his lover from their first intercourse, right?

He put each of his hands around his brother's pelvis to accentuate the power of his hips movements, pressing him against him.

"Do you like this, Leo? Hmm? I give you pleasure, huh? You are finally all mine!" Mikey growled, punctuating the assertion with a deeper thrust. "I don't want you to open Don or Raph's gifts." Only I can offer you stuff now or touch you," he declared fiercely.

Leo answered by inarticulate cries, bouncing like a doll between his brother's arms. Not satisfied with this response which wasn't an explicit consent, Mikey bit him savagely in the crook of the neck, in the same place as earlier, but with even more force 

"Mike," Leo moaned plaintively, still calling his brother by that name just shorter to pronounce when he had so little energy. He knew he should have yelled in pain, but the bite was making him mellow like a drug.

"Sorry," Mikey murmured, licking the wound he had just made. He didn't sound sorry a bite, satisfied by Leo's reaction and probably the mark he made. "Animal instinct, I couldn't help it," he explained, kissing the leader. He drew back, a trickle of saliva connecting their two mouths. 

"I wanted to see you like this, since forever," Michelangelo murmured, before attacking its throat again, biting, kissing and licking everything his mouth could reach. "Flushed and moaning and so docile."

Leonardo no longer felt the teeth penetrating his flesh, nor the nails, not the turtle plowing him. He no longer knew where the pain started and where the pleasure ended, carried away by the overstimulation.

Leo felt like he was delusional or drunk, no longer recognizing his little brother in this sweating and growling mutant, his eyes shining with lust.

Even his voice seemed different, more hoarse and manly.

"Shit, I won't last …" Mikey seemed about to reach his peak. "I've been waiting for this moment for too long ... but don't worry ... I have the energy to start again at least four or five times, before Raph and Don return," he grumbled.

Leo was about to climax again as much as losing his mind. It had to stop, the tiny rational part still working in him kept saying. If he had too much pleasure, he would send Mikey the wrong message. As if Mikey was reading his mind, he grabbed the purple and swollen cock of the leader, flowing with fluid. He started to jerk him off with energy.

"Give me another one. Now." Michelangelo demanded with authority.

As if Leonardo had waited only for this command, he spilled long ribbon of cum on the clenched fist of his brother. The topaz colored eyes shone with satisfaction and pride.

Then, after a last deep thrust, Mikey emptied himself in his brother with a guttural cry, before falling on him.  
Except their both ragged breathing, a silence stretched a full minute.

"Wow! It was awesome." Mikey glanced up to him. "As good as I thought it would be. And for you?" he wanted to know.

Leo waited to have the head out of his afterglow before responding. He'd never felt such a sensation but admitting it wouldn't do any good.

"It was good, Mikey. But, as I explained to you, it was the last time. You didn't respect the rule: by biting me you didn't use the discretion you promised. Anyway, we had agreed for this time only. I did what you want, so respect your word."

Michelangelo lazily raised his head.

"What I promised was that I wouldn't tell them. I said nothing. If Don and Raph figure it out on their own, I can't do anything about it. Then, if you remember our conversation, I only said that you were not a passing fancy, but I didn't make any explicit promise that I would give up on you." They locked eyes a moment and Leo understood that he had been played. Mikey wasn't looking like he would be tired anytime soon. "What exactly are you complaining about? Did you get off, yes or no? Did you think I would turn a bastard who's going to treat you like a one night fuck? The sex is good, but I also want to take care of you and treat you well," he declared, kissing Leo's shoulder. "Call me Mike, now, I love the way it sounds coming from your mouth," he concluded, the kiss turning a nibble to let another bruise on Leo's skin.

The leader rose suddenly to try to stand up.

"Stop marking me like an animal!" 

Mikey narrowed his eyes, scolding;

"Oh no, I promised to shut up, but I want to send a strong and clear message to the others. You're mine, Leo. I went through an ordeal, and you are my reward."

"What if I don't want to, Mikey, um? I am not an object that you can appropriate!" Leo snapped, accentuating the last syllable of his brother's first name, to demonstrate that he didn't submit to any form of intimidation.

Mikey fell back into the sofa cushions, still feeling mellow from the sex. 

"You won't have a choice, Leo. There are a thousand ways to make you fall in love. I figured them all out, at the Foots. You're not the only tactician. I have such a nice surprise for your birthday, "he replied, weary. "Let me take a nap, now, at least 30 minutes. I have been working so hard lately. You promised me you will be mine until the return of our brothers. You can go wash, if you want, I ..."

The rest was lost in a snoring sound. Ulcerated and shocked, Leo turned on his heels, fulminating, heading for the bathroom. He wouldn't let be impressed by the youngest's near threats. Eyes bright with anger, he stood in front of the sink and pulled out of a drawer the last mirror of the lair, the unique survivor of Donatello's wrath. He wanted to see the damage.

He heaved a sigh of frustration seeing his reflection; a vampire would have chewed on him less. His skin was going to remain marked for days and his other brothers were going to ask questions. He would find an alibi to explain it. Mikey couldn't deny it without breaking his promise. Leonardo clenched his teeth as he thought about his words.

Michelangelo wanted to claim a right over him? Not tonight, no ever anyway. He had felt guilty, sorry, stirred, but now he knew than any feeling of this kind had played against him. Whatever tenderness he could feel for Mikey had been wiped away by the daring pretension from his little brother. To see his image, this decayed version of himself, marked as a mere belonging, had hardened his resolve. Mikey will have to find another outlet for his libido.  
He was going to go see what Raph and Donnie were really doing. And he wouldn't come home before the sun, too. If he comes back. Maybe if he left a day or two, too, it would be a more explicit message.

"So, I have no choice?" Leo said to his own reflection. "Just watch me."


	8. Chapter 8

Leo returned, shivering and his head down, a little after 5 am, after a disappearance of 27 hours. He had found no trace of Donnie or Raph the first night and was beginning to doubt his ninja abilities. After all, he hadn't managed to find Mikey either, when he was detained by the Foots. The pride had prevented him from returning to the lair. Not after what Mikey had said. He had sleep into a container during the day. It had been an abnormal chilly, raining day of September. He had shivered for hours but had been determined to not go back home. He hoped his disappearance would have brought some sense back to Mikey. But now, he was 2:00 am and he was craving to sleep in a real bed. Eating some food could be good too, even if the anxietie was still knocking his stomach. But for now, he was too tired to eat. 

Thinking about Michelangelo made his heart miss a beat again. How had Mikey reacted when he woke up, noticing that Leo was missing? Indifference because he got what he wanted? Frustration? Leo wasn't ready to argue about why he left. How would he explain to them he left on his own, alone, after trying to forbid them the same? What if Don and Raph ask why Leo went out of his character? Leo could still be mad at Mikey and want to give him a piece of his mind, he felt tired and slightly feverish and preferred to avoid having a fight in such a weak state. He just wanted to curl up in his bed.

He sneaked into the lair, walking to his room on tiptoe. He was shivering more and more. No light was on and, relieved, he reached his sanctuary without having encountered a living soul. He really hoped Mikey wasn't waiting for him in his room. He turned on light to be sure he was alone and confuse Mikey before any move. Mikey wasn't there, but something new was.

His bedding had been changed. Instead of the blue blanket of his childhood, too short to cover him entirely, was a luxurious duvet and a new, fluffy pillow. A sheet of paper, torn from his brother's diary, had been left on the night table. 

_"Idiot. You are lucky that I love you. Go to sleep before getting sick. M."_

Leo frowned. Evidently, the author was Michelangelo, even dismissing the initial and the orange-colored gel pen, but something was wrong. It wasn't the same childish handwriting as that of his diary. The calligraphy was one from a self-confident man, not the hesitant sticks-like letters from his younger brother.

Was Mikey a clone? Or could one change at this point, following torture?

Shivering, he went to bed. The individual who called himself Michelangelo at least knew him well; tomorrow, he would be sick.

He woke up, his heart pounding and like in a fevered daze. The hand on his forehead was cold and refreshing and he opened his eyes.  
Donatello and Mikey were in his room. The scientist seemed dark and nervous while the youngest seemed only concerned. Neither of them was wearing their bandana, and seeing the bare chest made Leo it was a dream.

"Are you proud of yourself, Leo? Now you will be bedridden for at least a week! All of this because you couldn't trust us, Raph and me," Don grumbled in a bad mood.

"Don't get mad at him!" Mikey exclaimed, indignant. "Being sick is already a pain!"

Donatello's brown gaze slid to Mikey.

"Easy for you to say," Don commented, "You're not the one who will have to take care of this pig head. Leo is reluctant to any medical treatment. His cold has become bronchitis because of his lifestyle of endless training and lack of rest. And if he doesn't listen and want to train or patrol, which is very likely, it will degenerate into pneumonia," Don explained.

Mikey sighed in exasperation.

"You will have nothing to do at all. I told you I will take care of Leo."

Despite his weakness, Leo protested: "Stop speaking like I was already dead ... "coughing fit prevented him from continuing. Gently, Mikey patted his shell.

"Just tell me what Leo needs to get better and I'll take care of everything," Mikey repeated.

"I need corticosteroid pumps to dilate his airways. Then a humidifier. This will help liquefy the mucus. And make him drink a lot of liquid. I have cough suppressants and pain relievers in my lab, but for three or four days. We need three weeks of med to play safe," Donatello listed. 

Mikey nodded.

"I'm going to contact my friends and Leo will have everything he needs," Mikey said confidently. Leo felt the fogs of the fever move away. What friends was Mikey talking about? Since Casey and April, they had none, being completely isolated from the world. Leo himself had given the rule to avoid contact other than murderous. Don and Raph had suffered enough to have believed in humans. Mikey knew the rule and yet, despite his "love", had disobeyed when interacting with strangers. Where did they know them to start with?

He straightened up and asked the question. Mikey made a negligent gesture with his hand, answering that they were people kept prisoner by the Foot just like him. He had free them, he explained, shrugging his shoulders, his attention turned to Donnie, who was scribbling down his medical instructions.

Leo pondered over the information and despite the fever, he quickly came to the following conclusion: He had found Mikey alone and unconscious in an alley. If he had fled with "friends", whom he had helped in their escape, he wouldn't have been left alone and passed out.

It was impossible. Mikey was lying. To confront him directly on this subject was delicate. Mikey usually became defensive and in their current state, him sick and his little brother emotionally unstable, it was not the right strategy to adopt.

He glanced at Donatello. No chance that their brother in purple, so intelligent, could believe in Mikey's tales. He was going to point out the lie, so obvious. Strangely, Donatello's remained relatively expressionless, despite a touch of something that Leo couldn't define. The fact is that he says nothing, not confronting Mikey in any way with the improbabilities of his story, much to Leonardo's astonishment. Donnie loved to show off how smart he was, usually. 

"I'm' gonna ask them right away. I should have it in less than two hours. Watch Leo until I come back. Then I will watch over him. But before I go, go grab some painkillers and get me a glass of water for him," Michelangelo demanded calmly, like bossing around was a right he always had. "Bring back the thermometer, too. We need to write down his temperature hourly."

Donatello left without a protest about Mikey's abuse of power and that Don was perfectly fine taking care of bronchitis. Leo fidgeted as the scientist went out and that Mikey leaned over on him. Even if Mikey was smiling, the leader flinched when Mikey put his hand on his cheek,

"Easy, Leo. You are burning with fever. Don't worry, I'll take good care of you." Mikey promised in a soft voice, arranging the covers and seemingly wanting to kiss him on the forehead or the cheek. But Leo didn't wait to find out because he quickly draws his head, hitting the back of his skull on the concrete.

"Don't touch me!"

Mikey straightened up, looking slightly annoyed: "How do you want me to take care of you, then? If you fear that I'll try to make a move, you calm down. I won't feel you up." he promised gravely.

Leo then felt a burst of hope: Mikey had had what he wanted and, as usual, no longer wanted it. Everything was going to go back to the way it was before. But Mikey set the record straight:

"You're sick. I love you enough to put aside my desires. I just want to take care of you, like you did, dozens of times when I was sick," he explained gently.

Donatello arrived at that moment, a glass of water in his hand. Mikey turned his attention toward the genius, asking him if a water dispenser would be relevant and Leonardo replayed Mikey's words mentally.

What Mikey had said was not so bad in itself. His brother simply wanted to watch over him as indeed Leo did when his brothers were sick. Leo could have let him be; allow Mikey to spoil him, but he remembered his brother's words: "You won't have a choice, Leo. There are a thousand ways to make you fall in love. I figured them all out, at the Foots."

Mikey only wanted to coax him, manipulate him to achieve whatever he wanted.

His attention returned to his two brothers when Mikey, pretending to be thinking aloud, said,

"This hideout sucks. We're not comfortable enough, or that much safe, despite all your tech. I think that during one of my torture sessions, I heard one mentioning a manhole leading there. They really want Leo. He is not safe here and even less in this state. If the Foots come, he won't be able to defend himself as effectively as usual. I think I know a better place to hide. You'll have a lot more space for your stuff, D. I think there is a fully equipped lab, abandoned, all ready for you to play the mad scientist there, "Michelangelo proposed, a finger on his chin as if he was reflecting. 

Leo opened his eyes wide. It was apparent Mikey was playing an act, but it wasn't what was mattering now. Did he ear well? Mikey wanted them to move out? Leave the lair? But if Splinter returned, how would he find them? Either way, Donnie will never accept. He was far too paranoid and, proudly, was going to reply to Mikey that his precious security system was infallible and that they had no need to leave.

But his breath caught in his throat when he glanced expectantly at Donnie. His brother was licking his lips, his eyes shining with something similar at lust. Could the promise of a larger workspace appeal to Donnie to this extent? But no matter what the genius thought, Raphael would refuse. Raph was very-well known to hate change to his routine, whatever he pretended. When the turtles left the first hideout, Raph had blown a fuse.

"For Raph too, it would be better," Michelangelo continued smoothly as if he had read his damn thoughts. A gym and even a pool table… with a full bar. Finally, we will have a floor for each of us. Imagine? How it could be nice if we are not cramped and have intimacy." It was Mikey's turn to lick his lip lustfully, like a fox about to get the rabbit. Leo didn't need Don's brain to know why Mikey wanted to get more intimacy. "And then, we will have sun, fresh air ... and less humidity. I'm sure humidity is harmful to Leo and his fragile lungs. Am I right, Donnie?" he asked, caressing the back of the leader's head. The leader didn't even notice; he was too stunned at Michelangelo's suggestion and by the factDonatello seemed to condone this madness.

"Are you suggesting what I think you are, Mikey?" he asked. "To live topside? Never!" He had tried to sound his usual authoritative self, but to his own ears, his voice seemed broken and weak and Michelangelo had a sad look.

"Take your pills, Sweetheart. Seeing you in pain upsets me," Mikey said, forcing the pill gently in his mouth. "I love you so much."   
Leo almost choked on the pills, but Donnie barely frowned.

"Michelangelo," Leo protested, ulcerated at his brother's betrayal. Mikey had promised not to talk about it.

"Oh, sorry, it was a slip of the tongue…" Mikey shrugged as it wasn't a big deal. "Whatever, your condition is much more concerning," he explained, handing him the glass of water. There was a strong temptation for Leo to spit water in his face, but he swallowed it. Mikey couldn't keep a secret. He knew it since Mikey was a toddler. How often had Leo used his little brother's indiscretion to his advantage, relying on him to denounce the other two? He should have expected it and he cursed his naivety while the thermometer was inserted in his mouth. Donatello seemed unimpressed anyway. Maybe he thought it was a joke. Mikey had always had weird humor.

"The fever is still up," Donnie announced, worried. "If you want us to move, Mike, I warn you that Leo, in this state, cannot pack, carry, or even walk further than the bathroom."

"Duh! I'm a gentleman. My cutie pie will do none of this," Mikey exclaimed emphatically. "There is not that much to pack anyway. There is everything we need there. One bag each will be sufficient. I will carry Leo and Raph will carry Our three bags. These muscles must be used, you know." He flexed his bicep and indeed, Leo wasn't sure if Mikey means his muscles or Raph's since their bulk was similar. 

"No!" Leo's fierce negation cry startled the other two. "Raph won't carry your bag or you, me, because we're not going anywhere! I'm the leader and I object. We are properly settled here and Donnie's security system is efficient."

Again, he looked at his genius brother, but Don looked away, staring at an invisible point.

"If the Foots come here, Leo, it won't be enough. My system is to ward off the curious, walking too close to here. But against hundreds of Foots and Foots-Bot, led by Karai, so clever and determined, I don't think that's enough. I think Mike's idea is worth considering. Me and Raph can visit the place this evening and we will report to you."

Leo snorted.

"Mikey is exaggerating, I don't think Karai cares so much about me ..."

"Fuck you, "Mikey spat, indignant and Leo stared at Mikey's outburst. "Am I exaggerating? You dare to say that, YOU? After what I went through for you?"

He was shaking so much with rage that Don glared at the eldest. But to feel guilty would be playing Mikey's game and Leo was done playing.

"What I mean is that I doubt that Karai will go as far as to lead her troops for days in the smelly and dark sewers. Admitting she does," he huffed. He knew deep down she would never do something so foolish. It has been so long since he saw her. She seemed to have decided to focus on another goal. "Don's security system would warn us and we will have plenty of time to prepare either a retreat or to fight back. We are safe here. We are staying here," he hammered with conviction.

Mikey straightened, his blue topaz eyes flashing.

"You don't even know what you're talking about. I say we are leaving," the youngest decreed.

"Too bad Mikey, but only my opinion counts in this family. I am the leader. We are staying," Leonardo gritted through his teeth.

"Huh-huh, Dude. Splinter has appointed you the leader. Not us," Mikey said. "It was a completely decision ... what's the word, D?"

"Arbitrary?" he proposed.

The youngest nodded. "That's it. Arbitrary. We are America, right? We are a democracy. I propose an election."

Never in his life would Leo have thought his little brother would propose his deposition. The worst part is that Don seemed to consider the suggestion positively.

"Raph will agree. He has always challenged Splinter's decision. I'll go get him."

Left alone with his brother, Leo casts on Mikey a dark look.

"Don't look at me like that, baby. You asked for it."

"Whatever, Mikey. Your shenanigans will get nowhere. You won't get any kind of consensus from this family. The majority are three out of four ways. Donnie has too high an opinion of his intelligence and Raph of his strength. Everyone will vote for him and this election will get nowhere."

Mikey folded his arms, sure of himself. "We'll see."

The next instant, Raph barged in the room.

"Wow, Mike, if you're going to get us out of this shitty place, I'm your number one supporter," he proclaimed, enthusiastic. Why everyone called the youngest Mike, now, Leonardo wondered angrily. This name reminded him too much of when he surrendered and his cheeks and he flushed with shame, thinking of his cries of pleasure. He supposed that Mikey had explained to them what had happened when Leo was gone. Hence why Don wasn't surprised by the pet name and love 

Mikey turned to the bedridden leader.

"Do you need these elections, Leo? Don wants to leave. Raph wants to leave, I want to leave," he enumerated, showing his three fingers. "It's the majority, Leo."

Mikey was holding back to show how self-pleased he was, and Leo felt his eyes getting misty by tears of rage, but he refused to collapse in front of his brothers."

"I don't want to be a hindrance to your happiness. You want to leave? Fine. You can leave. So I wouldn't have to clean up behind you, nag at you for training or worry," he spat out resentfully.

His three brothers looked at each other in a stupor and for a moment, Leo hoped that his brothers would reconsider their project.

It was Donnie who spoke, very calmly.

"Leo. Without my medical care or me to maintain what provides us with electricity, heating and security, you won't survive the winter. Not to mention that you don't know how to cook. You lost weight in Mike's absence. Imagine alone. Then, without Raph to support you in the fight, if the Foots come, you are done. You are most dependent on us than the other way around despite your leadership and ninja skills. You cannot survive alone."

"You don't think about it seriously, Fearless," Raph added. "You care too much about us to let us go. You will be dead sick all the time and regret to not have followed us." 

It was kind of right, but Leo refused to get placated.

"I want to know what Mikey gave you to make you his supportive fellows!" Leonardo exclaimed and he had another coughing fit. He was exhausted, not understanding how, in a few days, his life could have been turned upside down.

Donnie and Raph exchanged a brief glance.

"I'm going to prepare a box of my research notebooks," Donatello announced, turning his back abruptly to get out of the room.

"Me too, I'm going to pack my stuff," Raph exclaimed, looking at Mikey and not at the leader. "Give me forty minutes and I'm ready to leave this crappy place." He didn't even cast a glance at Leonardo and stormed off.  
Now, he was again alone with his youngest brother, who was giving him a reassuring smile, but Leo could even stand glaring at him anymore. The betrayal was hurting him too much. How like it was tissue paper, his brothers didn't give a damn about his opinion was too upsetting. He wondered what he did wrong for his brothers to hate him that much now. He never abused his leader position before, right? He never did anything except caring and worrying for them. How they were ungrateful to pay two decades of brotherly love by this dismissal! And all of that because Mikey paid them, two whores? How they could turn their coat so easily only because they had sex? Leo had, and still, he stayed in the right path.

An uneasy silence stretched between them, that the youngest broke.

"I know you're furious, but you will be better there," Mikey said in a coaxing voice. "You will be safe. I suffered so much at the Foot tower, I don't want you to experience what I went through. Karai won't be looking for you, topside. She is very determined to turn you into his slave! I love you too much and to imagine you…"

Mikey speaking about his so-called love, when he hurt Leo so much did it. The leader snapped. Karai wasn't his enemy right now, but Mikey was. 

"Get out!" Despite his weakness, Leo growled very threateningly. He never felt so much pain and his anger was so terrible, he thought he could actually attack Mikey, even if it would be the last thing he could do. "Get out! I can't even look at you!" he repeated and Mikey stepped back, raising his hands peacefully, concern and worry written in his eyes. He seemed upset too and a twisted satisfaction to have hurt back Mikey took Leo. "All of you, you can leave. I'm staying here."


	9. Chapter 9

Leo was in a haze due to the fever. He wasn’t sure if he was asleep or awake. To keep a foot in reality, he glanced at the clock. The hours were ticking slowly and once in a while, there was a big jump forward of one hour. He was so, so thirsty. It's been now six hours since his brothers left his room. He needed to get a glass of water. maybe they were already gone, Loe thought. Perhaps they have abandoned him and panic filled him. He loved them, he didn’t want to be apart from them, but why they have been so unreasonable. Was he the one being stubborn? He would muse over it later, he really needed a glass of water.

He tried to stand up, but he was too dizzy. He didn’t even remember having been that sick before. He crawled to the door when it swung open. Mikey was in front of him, with a glass of water and a plastic bag.

“Leo,” Mikey exclaimed in a low voice to not hurt Leo’s headache. “I’m sorry I’m late. I’m bringing back some better pill and a pump. The pills you took earlier were expired for over a year, so they should have been ineffective.”

So it was the reason. Leo was feeling so weak that he let himself being tucked in bed. Mikey was bringing him water, so Leo wouldn’t fight him. He eagerly took the pills and downed the glass and used the pump as Mikey instructed him. Then, he lay back while Mikey put a towel damped in cold water on his forehead. They haven’t talked that much. Mikey only saying ‘here’ and ‘take this.’

At one moment, he left but very quickly and with a water-filled pitcher that he had put on the nightstand. He kindly filled a second glass and hand it to Leo who drunk all in one gulp again.

“I’m sorry before we left we should have left some water. But you kicked me out too fast and Don and Raph were eager to see this amazing new place,” Mikey explained, while caressing Leo’s jaw with his thumb, gently. "They would be back soon."

It brought back to Leo’s memory about the argument of earlier and his face closed.

“Please, Leo, hear me out before getting mad again,” Mikey pleaded. “I know you’re angry and feel like I’m bossing our family around, but it’s for your sake, I swear!”

Tears flowed freely down Mikey’s cheeks, who rambled an incoherent tale about his captivity at the Foot Tower. Among the staff, there was a doctor, a very nice person. He had treated the burn from the brand that Mikey wore on the buttock. Seeing that Leo didn’t understand, Mikey turned his shell and bent over.

“See? One day, they told me to say I hated you. If I did, I had the right to a shower and a mattress to sleep on. Because, I swear to you, our sewers are way cleaner than the floor of my cell. If I refused to swear I hated you, they would brand me. The showed me a heated iron with your name and asked me again to say I hated you and wanted to join the Foot. Since I refused, they did it.”

Stunned, Leo looked at the ‘Leo’ brand on Mikey’s left buttock. How he didn’t notice it, before? Maybe it was because of the shell. When Mikey was standing up, it wasn’t apparent, but as soon as Mikey leaned, the brand appeared. Maybe he didn’t notice because he had also avoided staring at Mikey too much, to avoid any misunderstanding. 

Mikey continued his tale, speaking of the other mutants locked up in the Foots, that he had free. Outside, he had realized he had forgotten one of them and had returned to open the last cell. But his body had betrayed him and he had passed out.

If Mikey didn’t explain himself that much about how he get free, Mikey gave many details about his friends: another mutant turtle, a crocodile, a monkey, a gecko, a vixen, and a salamander. They were all in Mikey’s fabulous hiding place. They were great, mutants like them and Leo was going to love them.

“You should not see this like us turning our shell to Master Splinter teaching. We are enlarging the clan, Leo. Seeing other heads, especially mutants who can understand us, will do us some good. In this new hideout, there is room for all of us. Don and Raph will have their own floor. A new, less suffocating place will do them good, Leo. They may come back to their normal self. And you heard them, this is what they want, but they want you with us as well.”

Leo was in deep reflection while Mikey was talking. At first, he was too mad, but after having heard the part about the branding, his anger had dimmed. It wasn’t a lie, the branding was there and it wasn’t like Mikey could have done it to himself. But when Don had examined Mikey, was-it there? When Don had talked about rape, he had averted his eyes. But never Don had talked about branding. Maybe Don didn’t, because it was obvious and didn’t want to rub it in Leo’s face that he had his name burned in Mikey’s flesh.

But it was hard to focus on something when Mikey keeps flapping his lips, adding more and more layers to his story, each detail confusing leo even more. For once, what his brother said seemed real. He described his “friends” too much to invent them. But then, Mikey had stopped talking about them, to focus on their brothers. Mikey said a new place with new people, more space and more light could benefit them. And that’s what Raph and Donnie wanted. His brother’s happiness had always mattered the most to Leonardo. Since the unfortunate incident with their human friends, they were so dark and gloomy and Leo hated it. For them to be like they were a few years ago was Leo greatest wish. And Mikey’s happiness mattered too. Maybe if he was with his friends, who lived the same ordeal as him, his little brother would find solace elsewhere than sex with him. 

“You and I too will have our own floor,” Mikey continued cautiously. “But, if you wish, I can have my own room and not sleep in yours. You know, if you want to be alone... “he added, looking down.

Leonardo narrowed his eyes, not quite fooled by Michealangelo pretended shyness, but Mikey didn’t give him time to interrupt.

“I respect you, Leo. I know, yesterday I went overboard and boasted too much,” he added in front of his brother’s somber air. “And there I challenged your position and your decisions. But you know, when it comes to yourself ... You don’t make the right decisions. Watch over the team and lead us in battle and you will have my support, but let me watch over you ... I have nightmares where you endure what I experienced. I need to know you safe, out of the reach of the Foot. We can’t wait for Master Splinter our whole life, Leo. We can still be there in ten years. And Master Splinter was damn old when he left. How old was he,75? Whatever he is, I’m sure he would want you safe and happy.”

Mikey’s voice was soft and genuinely pleading and his eyes misted with tears. In his feverish state, Leo wasn’t sure how to oppose Mikey’s idea. Michelangelo changed his mood and the topic too quickly, Leo doesn’t have time to counter at any argument. It had always been, but now it was highly destabilizing. Mikey had started talking about the torture and then, now they were talking about Master Splinter wanting Leo to be happy. But Leo was sure of it: behind this insistence, Mikey hid something else. Yes, Mikey might want his safety and comfort, but he had more.

He dropped his head, exhausted. The fever was overwhelming him, the pills not yet having an effect. He was in a too bad shape for a long argument. Mikey had chosen his day well for having this conversation.

“Tell me the truth. Where is your advantage? To insist so much, you must have something to gain from it. But what?” Leo asked the more sharply he could manage.

“I want to love you in the open. You would turn me down every time I want a display of love in front of Raph and Dee. You wouldn’t let yourself go. If we want sex, I want us to be able to satisfy our desire without hiding and stifling our moans.” Mikey confessed in one shot. “I know it’s the only thing holding you back.” He gazed seriously at Leo and again, the leader had the feeling it wasn’t Mikey in front of him. The voice, the look, everything was too mature like Mikey was now the eldest brother.

“This is why you were still pure: brotherly solidarity,” Mikey continued. “Why else would you refuse to be loved? You don’t wanna show off with a boyfriend while Dee and Raph have no loved one.” It showed Mikey had put a great deal of thought into it and Leo was a little stirred despite himself. “So I thought what about we told them about us, being together in this way. We could indulge in a display of love, not quite in front of them, but without hiding either. You’ll be more comfortable having a fulfilling love and sex life if you don’t have to rub it in their face. If you feel horny, you don’t have to hide in your room and fake you are mediating.” Leo blushed slightly at this. He always thought he had fooled everybody with this excuse. “We go upstairs on our floor and we do whatever you want. When you miss these two boneheads, we go on their floor. You don’t have to be chaste for them, anymore,” he insisted, seeing Leo wasn’t convinced yet. “They won’t stay chaste, I guarantee you.”

Leo was silent. Mikey had nailed it. His refusal of love was because he didn’t want to have what his brothers couldn’t have. It had always been like this. If Master Splinter gave him a sweet, Leo shared it equally even if it had been given to him. When they were little, Mikey was punished very often because of his lack of focus. If Mikey couldn’t watch the tv, Leo refused to watch it, even if his favorite show was on. And now, it was the same. Leo wanted to show solidarity with his sibling celibacy. If they can’t have a lover, Leo neither.

“Don and Raph may find a mutant to their tastes among my friends. They are more likely to find something there than here,” Mikey pointed out. “As I tell you, they will be in the same building, but not on our floor. We can eat together when you want some company. Human family members do that. They aren’t living all their life in the same house. It’s not healthy. They move elsewhere and then, invite each other over. It allows them to live their own life, but still staying a family. Of course, we are mutant and can drive in the daytime, so we will be all in the same building. It would also reassure you, to know them close to you. And when you feel you want to be loved or are done with their attics, we will return on our floor.”

Leo closed his eyes, tired by the conversation. Mikey was now rambling the same thing he already did.

“Or even, if you want to be alone, I can stay in my room or go to see one of our brothers or our friends for as long as you want. You will remain the master, Leo. From our family, from your bed and from my heart,” Mikey murmured tenderly and with his lip, he brushed Leo’s forehead beaded with the leader’s sweat and the water from the towel he just removed. "Everything would be better and you would be safe. No one would hurt you and I could guarantee you everyone would be happier from now. Please, trust me in this." He smiled. "Do you want me to talk to you about this place?"

Leo’s heart raced in his chest, listening to Mikey describe the brightness of this top-floor apartment, where Leo will finally be able to cloister the bonsai trees and the small, well-hidden terrace, where he could do his tai chi in the open. Then, Mikey raved about what their day would look like. There will be a Dojo where Leo if he wished, could train his brothers and their friends or him alone if he preferred. There was even a swimming pool, Mikey babbled and everything Leo could dream off. The leader would have preferred to know how Mikey found this place, but Mikey didn't let him any room to place a word, still raving about the details. Leo was amazed at such luxury in an abandoned place, but Mikey insisted that Leo would not run any risk. Finally, Leo, tired, accepted to surrender. They all wanted this and besides, why was he so stubborn about it? Mikey was probably right; Master Splinter was dead and would want his son safe and happy.

“If Donnie and Raph say it’s safe, I’ll follow you.”

Mikey promised him and kissed him on the forehead

“Now, you have to sleep. I will leave you alone but check on you every hour to be sure you are alright. Four hours from now, I will give you new pills, and then you could listen to Don and Raph’s report before making your final decision. But now, you need to rest.” 

Drained, Leo gladly complied. The final decision was his and relieved, he fell asleep, not even conscious of the blue eyes watching him closely.

****

When he woke up, his three brothers were in front of him. Mikey handed him new pills and helped Leo to drank some water to swallow them. The last ones had brought him relief and he was feeling slightly better.

“While you were sleeping, I gave you some water,” Mikey said soothingly. “I used my mouth to pour the water in your without awakening you.” Leo felt his cheeks burning. “I was afraid you got dehydrated like earlier,” he said to excuse himself. 

“He looks not that bad,” Don stated, touching Leo’s forehead. “The fever is still too high. He needs more rest. Where is the pump?”

Raph butted in.

“Fearless. This new place is amazing! No need to exhaust yourself with the moving. Mike will carry you. We’re going to put your princess ass into a real comfy bed. You will get quickly better there.”

Mikey glared at Raph and Leo could be feverish he knew why. Raph was moving too fast and Mikey knew it wasn’t the right way to placate Leo. Mikey had a lifetime of experience in coaxing him and wasn’t only getting better at it. Mikey was now nudging Don for him to put his two cents.

“Everything fulfills the safety and health standards,” Don enunciated a mechanical voice. “We will be fine, and especially you. We kept the most spacious and bright room for you. The sun would be a great healing factor.”

Mikey smiled.

“So, you heard them. Now, what do you want, Leo? You’re the one calling the shot, bro.”

It was lip service, but Leo nodded. What could he do? Refusing would only lead his brothers to hate him.

“We didn’t pack your stuff. I suppose you want to keep some books? “Leo argued weakly with Donatello, asking him questions about this new mysterious lair on the surface, but still looking at Mikey with concern. His younger brother was opening his drawers and randomly took some Leo’s belongings. Leonardo had always hated the idea people could rummage his room. No one ever tried because Leo assumed they were either too much respecting him or thinking someone as dull as Leonardo couldn’t have any secret. But Leo panicked and attempted a gesture to arrest his younger brother who suddenly approached too dangerous a place for the leader’s privacy. But Mikey’s incredulous shout told it it was too late. 

Eyes glistening with rage, Mikey turned around, brandishing the black lace thong pantie

“What is this shit?” Michelangelo articulated with difficulty, livid. Leo didn’t answer, looking for an answer, a credible lie. His other two brothers seemed stunned, too, to ask questions. Could he fake he found them and used it as masturbation material?

“So, you fucked her!” It was too late, Mikey had done the math and whatever Leo could say would be useless. Anyway, Leo wasn’t a liar. But he still wondered what Karai had told him. In Leo’s book, Mikey was overreacting. He had broken up with Karai long ago after a single night, because of his brothers doomed to not know love, the same reason, he refused Mikey. So, his brother had no reason to be jealous. Th only difference was that Leo had sex with her because he had wanted it and not to cure the Foot lieutenant of depression, but Mikey doesn’t know that. Karai had never understood his reason, and since then, she was furious at him. So perhaps she had exaggerated to crawl under Mikey’s skin. “It was true,” Mikey continued to yell, waving his hand like a mad puppet. “Everything that this slut said was true! Michelangelo squeaked, shaken with tremors of fury.

Leo was going to get into a long apology and justification when he remembered who he was. He proudly raised his chin.

“It doesn’t concern you, Michelangelo. My body is mine only. Mind your own business.”

This statement triggered a burst of hysterical laughter.

“I defended your virginity worse than if you were my middle-school daughter. Wow! What a disappointment!” Mikey exclaimed sourly. “I told her she was a bitch liar and that I was your first, but look like you’re as much a slut as Karai.”

Leo gasped, but to be called a slut in front of his other brothers had turned him speechless.

“Raph, carry him… I… I can’t even look at him right now.” Michelangelo exclaimed, hiding his face behind his hand. He was trembling in his effort to keep his temper in check. “I need a smoke.”

A smoke? But Leo was still flabbergasted by the slut thing to even speak. How could Raph and Don don’t tell Mikey he was going too far? But Raph said nothing and leaned over to take the leader and carry him at Mikey’s place. Leo suddenly got a bad feeling. His brothers weren’t defending him and were at Mikey beck and call. What would it be at this place Mikey found? It would be Mikey’s lair and Mikey’s friend and Mikey’s veto on everything.

“I changed my mind. Leave me alone here!” Leo protested and he struggled with as much force as he could.

“Don shut him up. I’m about to snap,” Mikey growled darkly, while still convulsively holding the black pants in hand.

Don stopped and opened his kit mumbling words where Leo understood only “stubborn bastard” and “diva.” Was Donnie talking about him?

Firmly held by Raphael and too exhausted by the fever, Leo couldn’t avoid the syringe containing a tranquilizer.

Before the drugs took effect, he had time to see Mikey ask Raph for his lighter to burn the “memory” of Leo’s night with the kunoichi. he put under Leo’s nose, fighting against sleep

“Look at this, Leo, that’s your past,” he snarled, putting the pantie under Leo’s snout. “The time when you belonged to yourself and your body was yours, only.” He was mimicking Leo and the leader fought against the sleep to know what was coming for him. Mikey had dropped his saccharine manners and he knew this was the real Michelangelo in front of him. Well, the real new one.   
“Those days where your businesses weren’t my businesses are over. Keep this in mind,” Mikey continue to threatened. “I was ready for sweetness and patience, but then, knowing what I know, you can forget it! You betrayed me,” Mikey spat, upset.

“What about we start to move our ass,” Raph proposed. Leo felt each of his attempts to get free weakening. “You could both play drama queen in a nice apartment instead of this shit hole.”

They walked, Leo threw over Raph’s broad shoulder like a potato bag. Mikey was walking behind to be sure that if Leo managed to get free, he could catch him. But Leo could get anywhere as everything around him was more and more blurry.

"I don't want to..."Leo mumbled.

Leo thought he heard Mikey’s muttered reply; promises of violence, enslavement, rape, but he couldn’t swear to have heard them. He wanted to fight back, but he sank into unconsciousness.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> art by Sherenelle (just imagine it at daytime)

A feeling of movement and well-being woke Leo gently. He had never been on a boat, but he dreamed that he was gently rocked by the swirling waves. Then, the awakening was more brutal when he realized that it wasn't the movement of the sea, but those of a turtle between his thighs. The blinding light in the room made him blink twice before identifying which of his brothers he was. His eyes weren't used to that much light. Despite the absence of a bandana, he discovered without real surprise, but with great indignation that it was his youngest. His features, he realized even more than for the first time, perhaps because of the clarity and the missing bandana, had matured. He never saw his brother in full daylight and seeing Michelangelo now, he could understand Mikey had sneered about getting an action figure. His goofy brother binge eating jelly-beans had nothing to do with the turtle mounting him. The jawline was well defined and the crease of his mouth, manlier. The stretched muscles of his arms were more developed than his who trained daily with two heavy swords. He still remembered the Mikey shoving Leo's birthday cake one year ago. Mikey had aged so much in one year.  
Perhaps it was the expression he was making that make him look so alien. The first time they had sex, Mikey had been thrilled and greedy like someone eating a delicious sweet for the first time. But now, Mikey was monitoring him, his face transfigured by pleasure, but determined and confident, busy focusing on ripping a climax from his partner. But Leonardo's second realization was even more troubling: his arms were tied. And something tight around his neck whose nature he couldn't determine in his position.

Mikey seemed to enjoy himself, the blue glow barely filtering behind his half-closed eyelids. His smile widened, seeing that Leonardo was now fully awake and aware of his situation.

"Mikey, let go of me now! It's rape!" Leo groaned, while furiously trying to free himself.

For a moment, Michelangelo's only response was to boost the pace, which hab be slow and steady until then.

"No, sweetheart, it is not. I'm doing it really slow and gentle, considerate, and all stuff. I even lubed you," he retorted mockingly.

"Regardless, I'm restrained," Leo growled. "Stop immediately," he ordered, despite the thrill of pleasure that was starting to overwhelm him. Mikey was hitting that spot...

"It's just a light form of bondage. Don't lie, Leo. This bitch has told me your secrets. You like it hardcore and you are kinky," Mikey finished, his face dark, now. He thrust forward like a bull obstinate to breed, smashing Leo's body against his, clutching his thighs with such fierce force that despite his attempts, Leo could only do desperate twists without breaking Mikey's grip.

"You never did that for me," Mikey grunted, persevering to make Leo orgasm. "You couldn't have Karai like you both wanted to be. She wanted more commitment, but you couldn't abandon us to be with her. You're a too nice boy for that. Not because she was supposed to be our enemy," Mikey sneered. "You didn't want to piss us off and rub in our face you got yourself a girlfriend when we will have a hot date with our hand. So, you sacrificed her"  
Mikey was pounding into him more violently, snarling. "You could have kept fucking her secretly, but that wasn't enough for her either. She wanted you to be fully and sneaking out was complicated. Splinter would have a stroke to know that you were getting laid with the Foot Princess. You broke up because you didn't want to use her without giving her what she wanted. So, to satisfy your insatiable desire for sex, you chose me."  
Leo continued to stare at his brother, impassive. To look away would mean submission on his part and he had always known that he should let go as little ground as possible for Michelangelo. Mikey attributed to him false intentions, but Leo preferred to hear him empty his heart rather than interrupt him. He really wanted Mikey's good at the time. Besides, Mikey had said it; Leo had refused to pursue any relationship with Karai, beyond their only night. Mikey should see it like the evidence Leo loved more his brothers than her. There was no reason to be angry.

But he was going to wait for Mikey to finish his speech; otherwise, an exhausting argument would ensue. Then, proving he was wrong would be easier. Mikey continued to pour his resentments.

"… less trouble to cross a corridor. But there, your little brother was less exciting ... so we had to turn off the light, for you to be able to imagine fucking in the mattress someone else."  
This was a little closer to the truth. Leo hadn't been turned on by the prospect of having sex with his brother, but he had assumed that Mikey should feel the same and not be eager to watch his brother giving him a handjob.

"But what drives me crazy is that you had remorse for using Karai sexually, but not me. I had to be content to be fucked without love, while Karai, she deserved better. You would rather broke-up with her than deceived her. This is what makes me furious, Leo: you wanted to preserve Karai's feelings, our enemy, but not mine, a member of this supposed clan so important to you!"  
During this speech, Mikey hadn't stopped thrusting into him. Leo bit his lips, refusing to let the slightest whimper of surrender. He should no longer show that he was affected, whether by guilt or pleasure. Mikey wouldn't hesitate to use any weakness that Leo might show.

  
"All this time, you loved her more than me." Suddenly, Mikey did something that took Leo off guard. His brother had slapped his ass, not a funny, teasing slap, but one that sting, with all his strength. It took all of his self-control, clenching his teeth so as not to wail in shock. Seeing the pain and the surprise in his big brother's eyes, the youngest smiled, caressing in a soothing gesture the buttock he had just bruised. The feeling was strange and his skin was over sensitive.

"Sorry, Cutie pie." Leo's face twisted at the pet name. "Did I hurt you? But you should stop provoking me, my sweetheart!"

"I didn't provoke you. I do nothing at all," Leo hissed. The sting of the slap still lingered, but it was nothing compared to how his chest ached to see how far Mikey could go in the revenge. It was like the good things Leo did for Mikey, his care and tenderness of the 16 years before this unfortunate time he enters Mikey bedroom wasn't counting anymore. "I let you unleash your rage and your hate."

"My hate?" Mikey repeated, surprised. "But I don't hate you, Leo. It's the other way around. I love you so much that I did it all for you!"  
Leo had time to catch a spark of panic in the blue eyes of his brother. Mikey, by this answer, had said more than he wanted. Because what had Michelangelo done, exactly? But now, Mikey was pulling himself out of him, probably realizing that it wasn't a position to have a conversation.

"You know, Sweetie. I survived the torture and everything," he tried to catch up on what he had just said. "Then look, I got this great apartment for us!"  
Leo looked around, taking knowledge of his environment, he had not had time to do, perceiving not only white and clarity. He was amazed to see windows, floor to ceiling within a few feet of him, when it was the day! He panicked, despite his wrists tied. Their whole life, they had been trained to remain hidden in the shade and to be in the open frightened him. Mikey looked at him, touched.

"You have nothing to fear. Not from the outside ..." he decided to add.  
Leo looked coldly at his little brother at the hinted threat, but he pretended not to notice.

"You see, when I saw this place, with the spectacular view and all this light, I said to myself: well, my brother Leo would like that. Tell me, from what you see, you like it, right? I tried for a mix of the two of us. Mikey asked, finally withdrawing from his brother's body and standing up so that the tied turtle could see.  
Leo analyzed the decor, with his ninja's eyes, already looking for a way to escape. The room was full-floor, with no wall, with a kitchen, a dining room, and a living room visible from the bed. The large bed seemed slightly raised, about two or three steps. At the bottom of the loft, just below a skylight, was a Zen garden, with a skillfully arranged tree that separated a glass bathroom from the rest of the apartment. Everything was white, except for the brightly colored works of art by Superheroes and a few yellow-orange and teal cousins. And a black grand piano that made Leo frown. What was such an object doing? But what most troubled the leader was the general appearance that emerged from the place: luxurious, clean, new and ... personalized. From what he could see, they were in the middle of Midtown at the height of about thirty floors. Impossible that the place was abandoned, moreover so richly furnished. And the Zen garden called out to him. It couldn't be random. It must have been installed in order to please him.

"Are you looking at my paintings? They're great, huh? Don't worry, I would add some from us. See how I take care of you? Mikey asked enthusiastically, all anger forgotten. "You have a wonderful penthouse now." Besides, you haven't seen the terrace! There is even a pond where you can feed carp, like a real Japanese, but, for the cherry trees, you must wait next Spring…"  
Leo was no longer listening, anxious. Something horrible was going to happen. Mikey had to work for the Foots. They must have implanted a chip or injected a serum to control his mind. The more he thought about it, the more evident it was. Karai was about to appear at any moment to take revenge. Or Shredder to avenge his daughter's dishonor. 

"… On the other hand, my mistake, there is only one room, hehe. You're going to have to make room for me, in your bed, kitty. You won't let your adored brother sleep on the couch, huh?" Mikey didn't even try to be convincing in this blatant lie. He knew all along there was only a room because it was evident that Mikey had visited this place and even decorated it. When? How? With wich money? Mikey had said he stole money from the Foot, but this was beyond what Karai could have in her purse, admitting she was foolish enough to let money there and she wasn't foolish. Also, wasn't Mikey kept prisoner at the time? To set up the garden must have taken weeks. And what about the carp pound? Who could have that in New York? Yakuza? It wasn't the Foot tower, it wasn't the same neighborhood, but the Foot was the most important Japanese criminal group in the city. There was no other explanation. Mikey was part of the Foot. But why Leo wasn't in a cell or bring in front of Shredder or Karai, then? Why was he in the penthouse?

"But for the rest you see, it's really cool. I know you don't care for the kitchen since you don't know how to cook an egg, but ... "Mikey continued.

"Too bad that since I'm tied up, I can't enjoy fully your generosity, Mike." Leo declared coldly declared the bearer of katana.  
He had given in to calling this youngest by that nickname. Obviously, his brother was suffering from a personality disorder because of what the Foots had done to him. To yield on little something could be enough for Mikey to lower his guards. Because this is what it was about. If Mikey was going that far into trying to overpower him, Leo needed to escape. Then, he could see his other brothers and figure out what was exactly wrong and how to fix whatever was broken in Mikey.  
Mikey shrugged.

"Yeah, too bad ... it's going to take a long time for me to trust you enough to until you." I know you, Leo, the Ninja," Mikey jeered. "Next thing I know, you will have made a rope with your bedsheets".

"What are you talking about?" Leo was now pale. He thought Mikey just needed him to be restrained the time he got off from their sex. "You will have to untie me at some point. For my hygiene…" the leader declared, trying to hide his concern.

"Yes, I had thought of asking Donnie to install a catheter for you, but hey, kind of a turn-off, don't you think so? I'm gonna hold a bidet for number one. You changed my diapers and you potty trained me. There nothing for you to be embarrassed off," Mikey replied nonchalantly as Leo looked at him completely devastated. It was too much for the leader who lost his cool, pulling firmly on the metal shackles.

"Never. Deliver me to Shredder immediately and get it over with it!"

Mikey looked with wide eyes for a full minute and then fell to the side, rolling in the bed in laughter, like the Mikey from before.

"Deliver you to Shredder? Nice one, Leo!"

Stunned, Leo saw that Mikey was wiping his eyes shining with tears of laughter.

"Tell me .... tell me, "Mikey hiccuped, "what happened in your mind for you to make this ridiculous deduction?" 

Leo hadn't expected Mikey to react like that. It was so a genuine glee coming from Mikey that Leo realized he had been wrong.

"You have changed too much," he explained, anyway. "And you want to break me. "The Shredder and Karai could be the only one hating me enough for that. So you work for them."

Mike put a hand on his heart, trying to regain his seriousness, with much struggle, obviously.  
"Honey, I may have changed but, I can guarantee that everything I do is only for my personal benefit and that the only thing I want to break in you is your stupid resistance to my love and the memory of this bitch!"

Mikey's topaz eyes gleamed dangerously at the mention of Karai and Mikey walked away from the bed, turning his back on the restrained turtle on his bed and headed for what appeared to be the sound system.  
"We need to start over."

Vintage music sounded in the room and Leo recognized Madonna's "Like a Virgin", but it was a flock of white lace Mikey had in his hand and Michelangelo's carnivorous smile that caught his attention as he came back to him.

"Let me put on a few accessories with this background music," he said, placing what was really what Leo had feared: a bridal veil. He shook his head furiously, trying to knock off the shameful adornment and started to thrash and kick. Mikey grabbed his chin and stared him straight in the eyes.

"Don't do that, sweetie," he said in a low, threatening voice. "Around the neck, you have a disciplinary collar. With a wireless remote, I can shock you. There are three levels. Level one is a warning, only. It will be like a pinch. A sharp pain, but it will quickly fade away. The second level will make you paralyzed for a moment and you are likely to get burns. I know what I'm talking about, I wore something like that myself." Leo remembered Mikey's collar marks and he listened, frozen by a shock that had nothing to do with electricity. "And the third level will make you drop dead after one minute. It's great for training disobedient pets, I have seen it at work on others...They all ended eating in their master's hand. "he explained and he pointed a watch he had at his wrist. "I can control your collar remotely with this watch. Cool, right? Looks like something from James Bond." Mikey rubbed with his thumb Leo's mouth corner lovingly. "I don't want to hurt you, my cinnamon rolls, but I won't have the choice if you try something stupid like kicking me in the face…"

Leo swallowed heavily. Mikey's voice was devoid of any bluff. This madman was threatening him with deadly electrocution if Leo didn't do as he wanted. He stopped struggling and let Mikey arrange him in a fake bride.  
Mikey's gaze became passionate, burning with desire and Leo got goosebumps.

"White suits you ... If you can see yourself ... you're beautiful ... Don't be sad about the collar. It cost me a great deal of money. It's in platinum. I wanted it to be as beautiful and precious as it was deadly effective. Like you, treasure. Do you want a mirror? "Mikey offered. Leo made a fierce sign of denial, not relying on his voice to be firm enough." What a shame, I would wish this image you never leave your memory. It would never leave mine, that's for sure." Mikey murmured. "Our life has just taken a drastic turn. I finally have everything I wanted." He slid a finger in the bounded turtle's mouth to open it and leaned over for a kiss. Leonardo didn't wince away, acting as dead as he was with a ferocious animal. "The reversal of our positions," Mikey whispered and

Leo eyes widened. "You are now helpless, at my mercy. I can give you pleasure, as I can make you suffer. I am the master of all your feelings. If you are happy or unhappy, it is because I wanted it so. But don't worry, I want to make you happy ... "he concludes with tenderness, kissing him again." I want to make from it a special moment, my love. Because this time, everything is clear. You don't give me your ass out of pity, Leo. I take it because it is mine."  
Leo stiffened, tightening his legs, but Mikey pointed at his watch and Leo, reluctantly, spread his legs while his brother's erection pressed against him and his hands caressed him greedily. What had happened with their brothers. Maybe Mikey had done something terrible to them. Leo had to comply to at least know where they were and if they were fine. 

"You don't want that, Mikey ... it's not you ..." the leader began cautiously.

"Call me Mike for the last time! It's not that complicated," Mikey snapped. "And I can guarantee you that yes, that's what I want ... You know I took Cialis?" he asked, pressing his hard cock against Leo's hole. I didn't want to cum in ten minutes like the last time ... I don't intend to stop so quickly. Not before I feel better about what happened and not before you beg and I hear you say what I want," he said, leaning in threateningly. He penetrated Leo suddenly, after taking each of the thighs apart in his hands.

"Hmm," he appreciated. "So tight ..." as Leo bit his lips so as not to moan in pain, shutting his eyes to not see Mikey like that and eventually have the strength to forgive him. But a second slap took him by surprise and he let out a little cry.

"Keep your eyes open!" There' s more darkness and false names," Mikey ordered. Mikey thrust in him ruthlessly for a while that looked like an eternity to Leonardo. He kept his eye open the whole time, but stared stubbornly at the ceiling. He zoned out of it, trying to reach another spirit level.

"Shit, I'm about to burst, but brace yourself, its only the end of round one."

Mikey suddenly groaned and with a shiver of disgust, Leo felt his brother's semen running down when Mikey pulled.

"We no longer have to hide," Mikey said, wiping himself and Leo. "So, it would be kind of better if you could let yourself go and enjoy it, you know?" Despite he must be still in his afterglow, annoyance laced his voice. "Don and Raph know this and accept it. They are too busy with their own lives to give a damn about ours."

The mention of their brothers gave back a rush of adrenaline to Leo. Raph and Don could not tolerate Leo being hold captive by their youngest brother. Even less knowing that Mikey had obviously been manipulated or had lost his mind.

"What did you do with them, Mike?" Leo asked, preferring to give in to his torturer by naming him that way again. "Did you deliver them to Shredder?"

"Again with this? It's about getting old. Are you obsessed with Shredder? How funny," Mikey snickered, exasperated. "Cialis or not, you're going to make me lose boner! Dee and Raphie are very happy on the floors below. Each on its own floor as agreed and is very well installed".

"I want to see them," Leonardo demanded. He needed to talk with Donatello. 

Mikey smiled devilishly, leaning towards him. He grabbed Leo's exposed cock and pulled on it, teasing him with his tongue.

"Satisfy me, baby and you will see them ... Act like an ice queen and you can forget that!" he proclaimed. His pulls were harder and it was obvious he was determined to milk Leo dry.

Leo pursed his lips at the odious bargain, but he considered his situation. He was tied up with chains, controlled by a collar, watched closely by a frenzied Mikey, in an unknown place. He didn't even know if his other brothers were there nor in which states, or who others lived in this unknown building. Michelangelo had spoken of friends. Who were they? Thinking about it was helping to not be over-conscious of what Mikey was doing to him, but his weak body was starting to react.

"What about you answer my kiss to begin?" Mikey growled. "With passion."

He sighed: Mikey had the upper hand. He couldn't resist now. He had to learn more and gain the trust of ... this stranger. It couldn't be Mikey, it was his body but not his soul. His little brother would never have done that. He really must have been altered by an unknown chemical or something. Don would know and Leo really hoped that it wasn't definitive. But for now, it was at Mikey's mercy and to see Don, he must be docile. His body sagged as a sign of submission and, with a delighted expression, Mikey leaned down to kiss him and Leo allowed himself to fell over the edge.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> art by NT

Mikey had kept his word. After having satisfied his brother, Leo was rewarded by Don and Raph’s visit, but on condition that this visit wouldn’t be too long because Mikey didn’t want to “tire” Leo because he was still sick. Leonardo could have retorted Mikey didn’t show the same concern to not exhaust Leo when it was for a session of wild sex. They had been on it for hours. Mikey ruthlessly pounded into him, but If Leo had to be honest, Mikey had spent an even greater deal of time to stroke his body all over in a kind of twisted worship. He had seemed to enjoy a lot to be in the daytime to see better and not be in a rush to finish it for the sake of discretion. If all of this wasn’t the result of odious blackmail and the fact he was restrained, it could have been good.

Leo had surrendered in the hope of seeing hi other brothers. Were they fine? The leader needed to be reassured about it. More importantly, Leonardo hoped they would realize Mikey had gone crazy to the point of restraining him and would step in. There was no way they won’t side with him when they would learn the humiliating treatment to which Michelangelo subjected him.

It hadn’t happened at all as he had thought. First of all, he had thought that, in front of his other brothers, Mikey would fake normalcy and treat him as he was used to do one year ago. He had believed Mikey would untie him and take away the collar. To his astonishment, Michelangelo had done nothing of what Leo had expected. 

When a knock on the door had been heard, Mikey hadn’t raised from the bed and he had unlocked the door with a cellphone Leo had never seen before. Leo was naked, his cock flat on his plastron since he couldn’t tuck it in, and he couldn’t cover himself from this shameful state with a blanket neither because of his tied up hands. Mikey didn’t see the importance of doing so before unlocking the door, letting their brothers in.

At least, during the sex, the wedding veil had slipped. Leo would have died on the spot from humiliation. 

Moreover, Mikey had continued to caress his thigh blatantly, in front of them as if he were a Columbia drug lord and Leo, a prized cat that he owned. 

“So here, our dear brothers, Leo. As you see, they’re fine. Could you told him how happy you are,” Mikey requested. “He had been concerned only of you since this morning.”

It seemed to Leo, seeing Raph and Don standing at a respectful distance, being in bed with Louis XIV, showing off his mistress to his ministers.

Raph was the first to talk, but Leo only listened in appearance. Was Raph not seeing he was restrained and obviously forced to have sex with their own damn brother? How could Raph be okay with it?

  
“You hear him?” he is fiiiine,” Mikey purred, nuzzling Leo’s neck. “What if now we resume our activities? Damn, I should not have taken this pill and listened to D. I feel like bursting from horniess.” 

Mikey’s hand climbed to his cock, palming it, trying to bring back to life, once again. 

“And you’re irresistible like that.” 

He leaned for a kiss, but Leo turned away the best he could. 

“Don’t! I would bite off your tongue,” the leader threatened. 

  
“Okay okay, geez, calm down!” Mikey chuckled, but there was a dark undertone in it.

Mikey exclaimed that the leader was cute when he got angry like he was a lovable pet. But Leo interrupted him.

“Donatello. How could you recommend to our brother to take a pill in his condition?” Leo was speaking in his commanding voice and put even more emphasis on the word condition. “If anything, he should not take a pill for erectile dysfunction. Obviously, this is not the part with a problem!” he growled. “Now could you both tell Mikey he is acting like a lunatic and told him to untie me.”

Donnie sighed.” Mikey, it’s not good for Leo’s blood circulation to stay tied up for so long,” he said earnestly, but without any urgency in his voice. “He won’t run away, he’s already sick. Then, he has the collar ...

The chief had raged with indignation: Don knew for the collar and wasn’t shocked by it.

“Hm..” Mikey hesitated. “I don’t want to hurt him, but you know how he is.”

Mikey stretched his arm to open the nightstand drawer, not giving a damn about exposing more their bodies covered in dried up semen. But what concerned Leo was what Mikey pulled out from the drawer. Leo immediately recognized what it was: a leash.

“I’m not an animal”, he barked, struggling against his restraints “I demand that I be released.”

Mikey laughed softly, before grabbing his head to kiss him possessively.

“Poor kitty. I’m ready to fulfill all your desires, but not that one. I can free your arms because Donnie said it could harm your health, but I leave you the collar on. It suits you so well and then, you won’t be able to go too far with this,” he said, waving the leash. “It would perhaps avoid us to use the collar to warn you.”

Leo struggled, trying to kick Mikey despite the threat of the collar. But Mikey hung the leash on the collar, keeping in his reasoning that he wanted to avoid discipline Leo and he had to bear with the so-called humiliation because it was better than pain. He rambled about how he got disciplined with the Foot and didn’t want Leo to experiment it.

“So why having put it on me in the first place?” Leo shouted. “And was it the reason why you are crazy now? Electrotherapy? It is how they brainwashed you?”

Mikey stared at him, obviously speechless in front of the leader’s outburst. Raph and Donnie stayed still like they were unconcerned about Leo’s fate. Leonardo glared the best he could to them, as a silent order to speak but they remained silent, until Mikey, having followed Leo’s gaze glared at them even more intensely, because Raph decided to step in and a very brief moment, Leo hoped Raph would try to reason Mikey.

  
“What exactly are you complaining about, Fearless? You live in a beautiful apartment. There is everything you can want. You have a Dojo, a library, a swimming pool, a garden ... You have light and clean air. You can do everything you did there, in our old lair, but in a much nicer environment. You got Mikey, too. He’ll do your food, entertain you and he could give a good time to a turtle.” Raph ogled the bed and Leo turned livid. “I’m sure he would give everything he got for you to be happy.”

Mikey nodded eagerly and Raph, encouraged to have Mikey’s support, continued despite Leo’s angered face. 

“You will have sex and love and neither me nor Don denies this to both of you. He can fuck your brain out, we don’t give a damn. It,s your business and we won’t be jealous or freaked out, like you were worried you would.”

Leo could admit it was at least a relief to know that his brothers didn’t seem overly concerned he and Mikey had sex before. But Leo had with Mikey’s consent when now, he only accepted it because of blackmail.

  
“If Mikey needs to leave and you’re bored.” A quick glance was shared with Mikey and Leo frowned, feeling they were hiding something from him, again. “I’m the floor below. We can still train and spar or just watch tv together. Mike has nice friends. It’s cool to finally see new faces! You just have a collar to dissuade you from going outside, putting yourself in danger. You’re a damn pig head, you know that. Being Mike, I will do the same. It looks more like a piece of jewelry than an object of coercion, anyway,” Raph shrugged and Leo gasped from indignation. “You won’t feel it anymore soon and when there will not have a bounty on your head anymore, Mike will remove it.”

Mikey nodded in agreement. It was temporary and for Leo’s safety.

Leo was silent, considering his position, for a moment. Donnie and Raph didn’t seem to have been forced to side with Mikey. Raph’s speech seemed genuine; he wasn’t sure to understand why Leo was so angry. They believed what they said and, being happy with their situation, they didn’t understand why Leo was complaining. It was simple. They had no collar, neither leashes nor sex against their will.

“I refuse to be treated as a pet,” he had spat out, between his clenched teeth.

Mikey rolled his eyes, exasperated.

“He drives me crazy with this whining,” he mumbled while undoing the handcuffs. Leo massaged his sore wrists and considered fleeing for a moment. Even without the collar, it was difficult. Mikey was firmly holding the leash handle. Three brothers were against him and he was unaware of what was behind the door and neither how to find the best exit.

Mikey proposed that his brothers stay with them today and eat together “for Leo to get used to it”, asked his other brothers to show the rest of the floor to the leader. He handed the leash handle to Raphael. Leo felt like a dog being taken for a walk and he arched.

“Relax, Fearless! I have it in hand, but I don’t hold it,” Raph said to appease the leader, showing his hand slack around the handle.

“No! Take that away from me!” Leo persisted, pulling on the leash to make it snap. Suddenly, a shock went through him and he found himself on his knees. Mikey had dared.

“You see?” There was a sorrow in his voice that made it even worse to Leo’s ears. “You are not reasonable and I am forced to make the decisions for you. I can take the leash off you, as I untied you, if you calm down. Raph and Don just want to show you around. They saw everything while you were out of cold and I can’t wait for you to see it. I don’t want to hurt you. Don’t force me to do by rebelling.”

Leo was panting, in total panic. The shock had been unpleasant and surprising, more than painful, but Mikey said he could adjust the amplitude. But what made him almost mad with anguish and pain was the intense feeling of betrayal. His brothers tormented him while he, Leonardo, had always taken care of them.

He wasn’t going to cry. He wasn’t going to cry, he swore to himself, clenching his fists.

Mikey crouched down beside him, took him in his arms.

“Sorry, darling. I really don’t want to ... but they’re looking for you and this is the best place to hide. I will protect you and, if necessary, against yourself.” He kissed Leo’s temple as a mother to kiss away the pain. “You can go have a sauna, to relax. Don and Raph will show you. I’m going to make dinner.”

Leonardo firmly pulled away from the embrace. Mikey was now playing nice to lure Raphael and Donnie better. But one day, they would come back to their sense and see Mikey for the lunatic he had become.

With much enthusiasm, his brothers had shown him around, but the indecent luxury added to Leonardo’s discomfort.

Something was off and it was an understatement.

He had encountered, in the hall leading from his apartment to the Dojo, in front of the elevator, a monstrous turtle, which bowed before them.

“It’s Slash,” explained Raphael. “He became my best friend.” Leo sneered at this. How Slash could be Raph’s best friend in a twenty-four-hour delay. “With me, he’s in charge of your safety.” Leo frowned, dazed. For what for? “All the leaders have a close guard, right? It’s our job, to Slash and me to be sure no one could hurt you.”

Leonardo looked up to stare at the new turtle. His cruel little eyes didn’t please him and although he trusted Raphael, his brother didn’t have a good judgment of people or situations. What had just occurred was another testimony f it. This Slash was so enormous, Raphael looked like a turtle tot next to him.

“I don’t know him. I don’t need him. I am perfectly capable of defending myself alone. I can accept reinforcement from you, Raph, but it is out of the question that I trust a stranger,” he stated.

His firm assertion didn’t seem to move the gigantic tortoise who returned to the guard position near the elevator.

On the other hand, Raphael wasn’t so passive, despite the vehement signs of Donatello telling him to drop it.

“Ungrateful much?” Raph snapped. “We swore to protect you at the cost of our lives.”

“Why?” demanded to know the leader. “I am nothing for this mutant. He has never seen me before today. Why should he be loyal to me? And then,” he spat out aggressively, stretching his neck so that the collar could be seen clearly, “You said a leader need guards. Do I look like a leader? Did you look at me, Raphael? “

Slash replied:

“The other Master saved me and asked me to protect you as well. It is the price of blood. He said you two were the Masters.”

Leo was silent for a moment. Was the other master Michelangelo? How could a mighty mutant like Slash obey his little brother, to the point of devoting his life to a complete stranger like himself? That could not be.

A theory bloomed in Leo’s mind. Mikey, all this time, may have been playing a character. Perhaps the real Michelangelo was the one who almost raped him? Sometimes he had this suspicion when he read his little brother’s diary: he sometimes seemed to write as if he knew he would be read by Leo; a diverted form of manipulation.

His little brother had fooled him, playing a goofy character, while the others saw the real Mikey. Obviously, Michelangelo had other weapons in its arsenal than puppy eyes.

He turned his back on Slash, followed by Donnie and Raphael. He remained gloomy throughout the visit, glaring at everything, much to the disappointment of the other two trying to spark his interest.

Leo noticed, glancing at a window, that he had misjudged the height of the building. They were rather on the 70th floor. However, his brothers only showed him the floor where they were, the last. This included, in addition to the apartment, a Dojo with showers and a sauna. His brothers led him to the terrace, surrounded by low walls, in the purest Japanese style, on one side and on the other, a swimming pool with deckchairs and a bar. Part of the pool continued indoors, but Leo didn’t utter any of the excited cries expected.

“We are in Fall, Leo, but in six months, it will be magnificent,” Donnie said, as an attempt to cheer him up. “The cherry tree will blossom.”

Indeed, Leo could imagine that luxury could excite people and, in other circumstances, he could have been happy to live in such a sublime setting. But all of this reminds him that Mikey was playing with him, hiding things from him, like the sudden source of his fortune and power, as well as the reason for his attitude toward him.

Not understanding his taciturn mood, his brothers brought him back to the apartment.

Back in what appeared to be his new dining room, the youngest took him in his arms for a kiss and grabbed his buttocks. Raph and Don acted as it was natural.

“It was long, it’s already ready.”  
  
They ate the primavera pasta, Leo in silence, barely touching his plate. At the moment, Mikey finished his last bite of cake, Mikey stood up, took Leo bridal style, and kicked Don and Raph out.

“Leave us. I’m feeling horny and Leo is shy.”

The intonation of the voice left no room for discussion and his brothers left immediately. Mikey gave an order and he was obeyed, even by his own big brothers. It had nothing even to do with pity for his ordeal at the Foot ... if ordeal he had had. Leo was beginning to doubt it strongly. Donatello had the same doubts at first but had not had time to express them. It was evident that something had happened that was highly disturbing Michelangelo but if he had been tortured and treated as a prisoner until the last minute, there was no way Mikey could have managed to get so many friends, money, and influence. He had the same thought about the katana Mikey gave him. He said he had ordered them, but it would mean Mikey was free months before they found him in an alley. 

“What are you thinking about, my love?” Michelangelo asked softly, his nose against the cheek of the leader he was holding in his arms. He had brought them back to the bed and it was easy to guess why.” Two pennies for your thoughts.”

“Why are you doing this to me?” Why are you treating me like this? I have always been a good brother to you! I treated you well! I looked after you and consoled you! Why?” Leonardo cried Leonardo, no longer able to maintain an indifferent appearance. He was so upset, for a moment, he didn’t care to be shocked to death.

“Because I want it to be my turn!” Michelangelo exclaimed. “I told you! I want to take care of you! I want to make you happy! Why is it so difficult to understand?”

“It is not tying me and treating me like a pet that you will make me happy!”

“She told me you loved it!” Mikey yelled. “She described to me what you were doing together and that you enjoyed it. You have a thing to be dominated, she said. I didn’t want to believe her at first, but now I know she was telling the truth!”

Leo shook his head. He had had only two sexual intercourse with Karai on the same night. She had dominated him, yes, but she was experienced and not him, at the time. Karai was also a formidable opponent, a stranger to discover, a very foreign female mutant body. It was a very exciting cocktail whereas, with Mikey, whose he had wiped the snout little, it was only degrading. Leo wasn’t a submissive person. If he had pursued his relation with Karai, the table would have turned rather quickly. But to be dominated by his little brother was unthinkable for him. It wasn’t even about topping or bottoming. This was something he could have given in, but what was incensing him was that he had turned down Mikey properly and yet, it was like Leo had no said in the matter. 

“It’s not the same thing,” he simply breathed. This response seemed to displease Mikey greatly.

“Fuck you. You will learn to love this with me too!”

He took Leo, pushing him down with his weight, forcing him to make eye contact. “I can do what I want, Leo, don’t forget. Good behaviors equal rewards. I might even consider removing the collar from you,” he suggested, but with a wicked smile. “On the other hand, belligerence will diminish your privileges.”

Leo raised an eye ridge. His brother had also acquired vocabulary, but that wasn’t what worried him. It was more like being treated like a Pavlov’s dog and to get a cookie when he was behaving. His little brother wanted his docility for a dark design, despite the protests of love. It was just a cover. To love wasn’t that: this absolute control of the other, this desire for enslavement. It had nothing to do with love.

Mikey pulled his cock out, pulling on it with dexterity while covering his face and throat with kisses.

“You will be treated like a king. I command everyone and you command my heart. Everyone here will obey all your whims, except about going out without me.” He nuzzled him tenderly as he wasn't realizing he just confirmer Leo was his prisoner. “You can do whatever you want. In the evening, we will go out if you want, to walk in the park, like a real couple. Or even go to a restaurant and movie theater. I can do that, Leo. For you, because I love you. You have to trust me, my love. Let yourself go, let me love you and everything will be fine.”

Leo had retained the verb “get out “only from Michelangelo’s raving. For now, by himself, to escape seemed impossible, but it couldn't be the case forever. Mikey has real attention span issues. He would eventually let his guard down. 

“Can..can you put your orange bandana on?” To ask something would make it looks like Leo was considering it seriously and won him time. Perhaps, it would also prevent Leo to go overboard and kill his brother. He wanted Mikey to be stopped, but even if he deeply hurt Leonardo, he didn’t wish to Mikey any harm. Just to stop forcing himself on him and return to his usual self. He still needed the help of his brothers and seeing how obedient they were to Mikey, it could take a while. But Leo needed to win time and some thrust and gain information about his surroundings. He knew there was only one way out: to play the game.

“Wow, didn’t know you could be kinky like that,” Mikey chuckled. He opened the drawer again and tied up an orange bandana. It wasn’t the same he was used to having before. This one has a black satin underside and some blood splatter on the bright side.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For you, Yuvena :)

One hundred-thirty-four days. Fall had ended; winter had come. Leo's birthday, Halloween, Mikey's birthday, Thanksgiving, and Christmas had passed. He had been a prisoner in this luxurious penthouse for more than four months, bearing with Michelangelo's overwhelming "care." Whatever happened with Michelangelo, he still loved parties and holidays. For Mikey's birthday, Leo had hoped Mikey would maybe allow Leo to leave to 'buy a present for him' and he had asked. The permission had been denied; Leo could only genuinely smile, and it would be the best present, Mikey had retorted. Christmas had been lavish; Mikey had said that now than they could afford it he wanted to celebrate it like in the movies. In their penthouse, they had a 15 foot Xmas three, a six-course menu and the whole living room had been filled with presents for him, when Leo couldn't return anything back.

Worded this way, Leo seemed to be complaining about nothing. But not being your own Master drove the leader crazy.

Apparently, everyone obeyed him, except for not removing his collar, not going out, and not answering his questions, despite the subtlety with which Leo asked them. Also, at first glance, he seemed to decide on his schedule. The reality was that Mikey wouldn't let him get out of bed until 7:30 a.m. And the first 40 minutes were reserved for some "loving." Leonardo supported the morning sex stoically, to move forward with another day to check on the calendar.

Mikey would prepare breakfast while Leo could repeat Tai Chi movements or meditate in the living room or drink tea while watching the news.

After breakfast, Mikey escorted Leo to the Dojo where his other brothers were waiting.

Each time, he saw Slash outside the elevator door, and it didn't take long for Leo to realize the truth. The awful mutant wasn't there to protect him, but to prevent him from leaving the floor.

That Mikey refused Leo to venture outside alone could make sense if the story about him being in danger was the truth. But why couldn't he move freely in the building? If there was danger, then why did he choose this show-off place? Despite his promise, Mikey never removed the collar nor took Leo on a 'date'. But he refused to abandon. To lose hope would mean to die and with him, all possible redemption for his siblings. 

Leo kept wondering about a way to escape while practicing the ultimate ninja art: deception. Never before has Leonardo had to test this skill, but this time it was necessary. He was in danger, Don, and Raph too, probably and even Mikey. When he did his first check-up on Mikey, Donatello had not seen any trace of chemical mind-controlling him, but as brilliant as he was, the scientist could have been wrong.

If Leo wanted to save all of them, he needed to discover the secret of Michelangelo. How could the young mutant, 17 years old now, own such a luxurious building and control everything that lived there? Because Leo was not mistaken, despite the bows and stuck-up manners from the mutants appointed to his service: the real Master was Mikey. Everyone in the place looked like they would take a bullet for him.

So, from 9.45 a.m. to 11.30 a.m., it was training.

Raphael was still there as well as Donnie. And another mutant, "friend" of Michelangelo. It was a new one every day. Leo refused to care for or train them, as it was supposed to be. A voice told him that he might have to make allies in the place, but he couldn't do it. For him, it was like he would sharpen the blade of an enemy.

Leo knew he was also a mutant, hideous from a human point of view, but those other mutants ... frightened him. He knew he was supposed to be Fearless, at least, according to Raph, and shouldn't be judged by appearance, but that was stronger than him. This gigantic crocodile, for example. He measured two Mikey, both in height and width, with two rows of sharp knives in his mouth. Leo wouldn't not teach him how to fight when this guy was his own army already! This mutant had the word "Danger" written all over it. And he was obeying Mikey? Impossible!

Donnie was leaving the Dojo when Mikey arrived. And there it was, irrefutable proof that Leo had no control at all. Donatello was going to apologize, pretending to have to work on their safety and leave, while Mikey, without explaining why he was late and where he had been, took his place. And Leo couldn't object.

In the Dojo, there were always three against him, permanently. If he tried to escape, that made it almost impossible, even without the collar and Slash near the elevator.

After the training, Mikey dragged him in the shower, fucking him against the wall, whispering about as he had been handsome at the Dojo. It was his second sexual intercourse of the day, often even in the presence of Raphael. Mikey had warned him that the collar also worked in a humid environment, but the water would make the shock deadly.

Leonardo wasn't at the point he wanted to die, so he let Mikey did as he wished.

When they returned, lunch l had been prepared and served, by someone unknown. The first few days, Leo had feared being poisoned, but seeing Mikey eating with a good appetite, on his own plate and having suffered no discomfort for the moment, he admitted, the sixth day, that he was only paranoid.

Then, after eating, Leo was free. Free on the condition that it remains on the floor or on the terrace. Oh! And free for Michelangelo to follow him, until he gets bored and sends another guardian in his place, who remained silent and at a respectful distance, but watching his every move. Sometimes, Mikey came back for a quicky in the late afternoon. Mikey didn't mind starting his foreplay when Leo's baby sitter was still there, to Leonardo's embarrassment. Mike obviously had an exhibitionist fetish. Or it was another psychological game to make Leo feel even more degraded.  
Often, Mikey left for unknown destinations and reasons. In the evening, at dinner, if Leo wanted it, Raph and Don would eat with them. Even though Leo studied them, taking a dive in their soul, he didn't want anything strange about them except contentment. They spoke with Leo reverentially, as if Leonardo wasn't wearing a deadly dressage collar and as if nothing was absolutely not abnormal.

Then they watched TV and Leo always had a choice of film or show. It was pretty much the only thing Leo really decided, the last remnants of his leadership: the TV.

Around 10 p.m., bedtime came, a moment he feared because it was when Mikey took his time to "take care" of him, making love to him with refinements which he sometimes made difficult for Leo to do as he always did: stay in his inner world. His body sometimes betrayed him and he was ashamed of each of his orgasms that his younger brother persevered to rip from him.

For four months, he had been a prisoner and this harem pet treatment had driven him mad, but out of hope of knowing to save himself and his brothers, the former leader had endured everything with stoicism.

Until now.

Tonight, Mikey wanted him to ride him, forcing Leo into a less passive role, where he couldn't escape thanks to meditation. His youngest wanted him to be fully aware and participative.

Leo couldn't.

Even if he thought that confronting or disappointing Michelangelo could only make him lose the points slowly accumulated by weeks of docility, he couldn't. The feeling of enslavement, of decay, weighed too heavily on his proud nature.

It was silly, it wasn't like they never got sex. He only had to impale himself on the impatient cock of his younger brother, then rock on it with feigned enthusiasm. Lots of prostitutes managed to simulate pleasure, desire, and love, but unfortunately, Leo was not made of this malleable clay. He couldn't help it, they just have crossed his line.

If he still had his katanas on him, he would end himself tonight. But Mikey was cautious that Leo couldn't get any blade, not even a butter knife. In the Dojo, he had to go through sparring and practice with a wooden bokken. It was maddening.

He was tired of his unwanted and repeated sexual acts. He was going mad to no longer be able to be free to move and to be on edge, always wondering when Mikey would snap or what all of this hid. He couldn't sleep at night, anxious too that Mikey accidentally triggered the remote linked to his collar.

Then something happened that had never occurred to him.

He burst into hysterical sobs.

It wasn't really crying with actual tears, it was more like a panic attack. More and more, he was getting ripped from a part of his identity. Mikey looked at him without saying a word, his cock turning soft in a blink. Then he got up, abruptly.

"I'm going to make you a herbal tea to sleep ..." he said, his voice strained, striding towards the kitchen. Leo followed his movements with concern, despite his tears. Mikey searched the cupboards and tea containers harshly. Then, he grabbed Leo's mug, and quickly put it on the counter. Mikey looked irritated while plugging in the kettle.

"I'm going to sleep somewhere else tonight. You need space. I see how much of a bother I am to you... "Mikey uttered coldly. "I don't get why. I do all your whims. Okay, you're going to tell me that you never ask for anything ... It's true. But if you didn't act as if you had made a vow of silence, I will make them ... I always have to guess! I try and I try, but it's like you don't see the efforts I make for you! Whatever I do, it's never reaching you!"

Leonardo didn't answer, trying to calm himself down, before.

"Stop crying!" Mikey shouted. To see Leo that much crushed seemed to greatly upset and incense him. "It's not you! You're supposed to be the Fearless Leader! "Mikey was angrily opening a tea can. "Why are you not happy? I do everything for that! I spoil you, I protect you, I show my love in any possible way!" His cries rang out in the loft, as he took his head in both hands as if Leonardo were an obstinate enigma. "You're so ungrateful!"

That was taking the damn cake.

"You take good care of your prisoner, I admit it, Mikey." Leo retorted icily.

The other turtle seemed frozen for a long time. Then, mechanically, the youngest replied,

"You've had good behavior, Leo, in the past few months. I give you that. You must be due for a reward. Have a nice sleep alone. We'll meet again when you want to see me. But I advise you to not try something stupid. Otherwise, you go back to square one. Capiche?"

Leo said nothing, barely breathing, motionless as a corpse. Out of instinct, he acted death like he was in front of a feral and deadly animal. Mikey, despite the daily routine, remained unpredictable.

Anger was pouring from Michealangelo so much, Leo could feel it from the bed. Mikey stood staring at the kettle, waiting for the signal that the water was at the temperature Leo was taking it, while measuring the amount of chamomile. Suddenly, even though his brother often made this gesture, Leo was touched by it. Despite their argument, his brother wanted to serve his herbal tea as Leonardo took it. He could have told himself to the hell with that.

So he sincerely thanked him when Mikey handed him his mug.

But Mikey left without a word, slamming the door.

Leonardo stayed awake until late, fearing punishment at every moment. Who knows what Mikey could do? Threatened to slice Donnie's throat if Leo wasn't riding him with eagerness? But exhausted, he fell asleep without anything having happened.

The next day he woke up late, and with surprise, he was alone. He got up and cautiously strolled around the empty apartment. He found a word:

_"Fresh fruit already cut in the fridge. Have a good day. Don't forget that I love you, a hell lot."_

The last sentence was underlined, with three angry lines. Leo shrugged. He wasn't going to worry about Mikey's games today. Alone, he could think and observe at his ease. It was one of the luxuries he didn't have since he was a prisoner. 

No doubt cameras were watching him. If Mikey could afford such indecent luxury and Donnie's technical help, security cameras were very likely.

So he decided it was the best time to gain Mikey's trust: to look normal. He finally fully succeeded in his meditation session and didn't attempt to go out, even to go to the Dojo. He did part of his training in the living room, facing the doors leading to the terrace.

All along, Leo, while forcing his features to make a peaceful expression, analyzed his situation. To escape was as impossible as day one. He still doesn't know the building layout and still has the collar. He had made not a single ally in the place. He hadn't managed to win Mikey, either, since they never went for a walk as promised. Michelangelo seemed suspicious despite Leo's goodwill and his two other brothers were either oblivious or indifferent to Leo's oppressed feelings. He was almost positive to have seen Raph masturbating in the shower as Mikey fucked him against the bathroom wall like it was a live show.

Salvation could not come from them. At least not right now. There was nothing to do but wait. So he didn't try to force the collar either.

These were his thoughts when he heard a polite knock from the door. Expecting Mikey and not understanding this discretion, he got up and was amazed to discover a lovely young Japanese girl, wearing a magnificent teal silk kimono, embroidered with birds and a traditional hairstyle. She bowed, calling him Leo-Sama and told him that she was appointed to his service.

Leo, very surprised, detailed her. She was small and gracious, with velvety eyes from the color of wild plum and long eyelashes. Her delicate features were enhanced by the white makeup, and the lipstick was giving her lip the allure of a rosebud. She seemed to have come out of an ancient print. What was this splendid creature doing there, he wondered, fascinated.

"I'm here to help you relax ...".

Leo frowned. Mikey had sent this girl to her as a courtesan? It was strange. His younger brother liked to exhibit Leo but refused Leo to be touched and this was one of the reasons why Leonardo no longer had the same pleasure in training. Mikey wanted to be his only opponent. Even Raphael wasn't out of the limit of his burning jealousy. Was Mikey jealous only of males rival? He didn't know Leo well at all. Since he met Karai, years ago, he knew women could be a weak spot for him.

But maybe it wasn't that, he thought to himself seeing a shamisen with her. Maybe she just got hired to entertain him; a toy to keep busy Mikey's precious pet.

"I do not need anything. I don't have to relax, I have nothing to do from my day,s already," he said bitterly. 

"The Master thinks otherwise. He is sad because you aren't happy. He is going on a long trip and doesn't want you to be bored during his absence."

Leo listened: Mikey was going on a long trip? Was it true? How was it possible? Wasn't it dangerous? He couldn't help but feel concerned. To be on a trip seemed very foolish when you were a green mutant over 6' feet tall. Then, he decided it could be miraculous. Perhaps this young girl would be useful to him. Maybe Mikey didn't get the time to "program" her to avoid Leo's questions, like the other 'staff' members. So he let her in and asked her name:

"Your brother named me Satoko when he delivered me. I forgot my real name during my slavery. But he said you could name me whatever you wanted and make from me what you liked. He said you were kind and would take great care of me," she concluded, with a graceful bow. "I followed the path of a Geisha for ten years. I do hope my unworthy person would please Leo-Sama."  
  
Leo turned pale He didn't want a slave when he was one himself. She seemed devoted to Mikey, like everyone. Leo wondered what his youngest brother had done to deserve so much worship, without wanting to brag about it to Leonardo. If it was so admirable, he would have used it to impress him, right?

But the new company was welcomed and her soft gaze only reflected sincerity. Then, he had never heard a geisha play his instrument in real life.

Besides, he had never seen such a pretty girl; not even Karai had such a lovely face.

"Welcome, Satoko."

***  
Every day spent with Satoko was a delight.

The first day, Leonardo had been suspicious. That the girl didn't seem horrified by his appearance was already unusual. He had questioned her with insistence. What he got out of it was astounding.

Satoko had only been in America since the morning. She had traveled all night by plane, from Kyoto, Japan. She didn't know why Mikey had chosen her, among the hundred Geisha of Gion. She spoke of a catalog sent to strangers, perhaps. They hadn't told her anything, except that an American danna had bought her and she had to leave. Leo had been confused. He knew Japanese customs well, but little about Geisha. But he knew that this kind of purchase was nowadays irregular unless one has a lot of influence and a lot of money.

He asked her what Mikey told her. She had only seen Michelangelo for ten minutes upon arrival. He had introduced himself, had explained that it was a gift for his beloved, for Valentine's Day, and had laid down his rules. She has to entertain Leo without him going out. She had vowed on her head that Leo wouldn't leave the floor, since, if he did, he would be in danger.

Leo had bitten his lips in frustration: in fact, she was a pretty jailer. Mikey knew that to cause no trouble for the girl, he would behave. It was a smart move, showing little brother knew him too well and could be unexpectedly cunning.

She came with about twenty suitcases, including 30 fabulous kimonos and Leo supposed it means she would stay there for a while.

His distrust diminished when Donatello, who had come to visit him, seemed very surprised to see her. If Donnie had not been consulted, there was perhaps a chance that this was only an impulse from Mikey. An impulsive move meant non-reflection and, therefore a decrease in the potential danger that she represented.

Then Satoko spoke to him about her life with undeniable candor.

Although this was prohibited, she was sold by her mother before she was three years old. So she had no memories before the okiya. She was first assigned to housework and then as help to the older geishas, before starting her training at 6 years old. She had become an apprentice at twelve.

During this time, his okiya had fallen under the control of the Foot. She was rebought, at 13 years old by them. She had been subjected to "shameful" training with them, she explained with downcast eyes. But, she hoped her misfortunes had come to an end with her purchase by Mikey. 

She was only 14, she admitted to Leo, but soon 15 and Leo, startled, realized that, at this tender age, this poor creature had been sold three times, in addition to having changed her name as much.

"Satoko, I can't tell you about my brother's intentions. He also suffered a lot and is a little confused now, but he has a good heart, I assure you. He won't hurt you."

The girl smiled:

"I belong to you, he said, and told me the same thing about you."

Leo wasn't sure if she had meant that Mikey had said Leo was confused or that he won't hurt her, but every minute of the following month had been a poem.

Satoko danced for him and him, he did his katas in front of her. They practiced calligraphy together and she served him tea. She played music and sang. She arranged flower bouquets every day, everywhere. She folded sheets of paper to give them funny shapes, which she offered him. The apartment was a treat for all the senses and he felt intoxicated by the beauty that surrounded him.

The Geisha didn't seem grossed out by Leo's scaly body. They were getting along the more they discovered each other, speaking of their respective country. The days were wonderful, worthy of an ancient tale where worries had no place, the image of Mikey diminishing in Leonardo's mind and so, his anguish.

But at night, Leo slept poorly, alone in his bed while Satoko slept on a futon unrolled on the floor, with a headrest so as not to mess her hairstyle.

In this empty bed, he couldn't sleep. He was cold. he felt alone. Was it because he had been used to daily sex and now, missed it? 

From the first evening, she offered him a massage, but Leo refused. And every night, she asked him again. At each refusal from him, Satoko made him an origami crane, scattering them in the apartment and Leo tried to be satisfied with this gift. He didn't want to run the quiet agreement between them.

Despite her kindness, Sakoto couldn't be attracted to him. Leo didn't want to be caressed by these beautiful hands if she did it by obligation. She had suffered enough in the past. But it had been a month since she had been with him. And he felt his resistance diminish, watching her dance with the grace of a butterfly on the terrace at sunset.

They were at mid-March and the days were warmer. Some of Mikey's friends had come to fill the basin, which would be the pond, no longer afraid of frost at night. He and Sakoto had fed the carp side by side and laughed together at their voracity. Leonardo had to admit that his heart had beaten faster at that time, but he had to silence him. Firstly, because it was unthinkable that this attraction was reciprocal and secondly because he feared Michelangelo.

Despite Sakoto, the harm had been made in Leo's soul. He had been held captive too long and the betrayal he had felt had been too vivid. Maybe he was getting paranoid. Mikey's behavior was threatening; he wasn't even there. But this absence itself seemed suspicious to Leo, like that of a predator who temporarily withdrew to heal his wounds while preparing a violent comeback. So he was on his guard.

He even had no idea where his brother was. Don rarely came to see him. Raph had asked the first ten days if they would train. Then, he had stopped on the tenth negative answer, understanding that his elder wanted to be left alone.

In reality, Leo feared to leave Satoko alone and also didn't want witnesses to the looks he had for her. He no longer trusted anyone, much less Mikey's multiple "friends".

He finished his cup of sake while the beautiful Geisha concluded her dance, in a magnificent multicolored kimono, making her long sleeves flutter elegantly. Leonardo's throat tightened: he had never seen anything so beautiful as this young girl dancing in the twilight light, the orange of the kimono shining brightly.

Who was he fooling? He desired her.

Maybe he could have a light touch and be content with it?

In a strangled voice, while pouring himself back the sake to give himself courage, he asked her to come and sit near him.

Satoko comes to kneel, docile, at his side.

Embarrassed, not quite knowing how to formulate what he wanted, he faked sore muscles.

The young girl's face then took on a serious expression and she nodded. She offered to go inside, where it would be more comfortable.

Overflowing with anticipation, but making efforts so that it doesn't show, Leo lay down on his plastron, while Satoko opened an ointment.

"I'm going to start by brush away your scutes and scrub your skin, Master, I'll wax your shell and oil your limb. Your skin will then be softer for our lovemaking."

Hearing this, Leo's eyes widened. He had never intended to go this far, but he found nothing to answer, or rather, he didn't trust his voice. And then, what could he have said? He no longer had the will to oppose a polite refusal. If he did, he would regret it for life. God only knew when his brother was coming back.

The caressing hands rested on his skin and a shiver of pleasure shook him. He bit his lips, so as not to moan aloud his contentment.

"Turn around on your shell, Master."

He did not have to be said twice and the skilled hands ran through his body. Although he tried to compel himself to stay unresponsive, his lower half has a mind of its own.

Embarrassed, he tried to get up to end the massage.

"Don't worry, Master. I was trained to give pleasure."

The word trained was enough to free Leo from his enchantment. He didn't want to be a "job" or a "duty" for Satoko.

But with natural, she took his swollen cock in hand.

"Close your eyes, Master. Let yourself be carried away by pleasure."

It was feeling so good to have this soft hand on him and this pretty face gazed at him that resistance ceased and Leo let himself go.

When he opened his eyes, Satoko's smiling face was lifted up to him.

He took her delicate face between his hands, scrutinizing her intensely.

"My precious ..."

She interrupted him:

"Make love to me ..."

He immediately surrounded her in his arms, all embarrassment gone, freeing the body from its colored silk shroud, caressing and kissing each bit of newly discovered skin. Her skin was so soft that it almost seemed to him that it was still the silk from the kimono.

He was captivated by the different colors of their skin when,delicately, sank into her while bringing their lips together for a sweet kiss.

He had never had this possibility with Karai to take his time and he had never felt such tenderness, such well-being and it was overwhelmed that he collapsed on her, finally after an overdue climax.

They stayed like this for a moment and Leo was still in a bubble of bliss when the door opened, and a muscular turtle stepped in. In the semi-darkness of the room, Leonardo took the intruder for his brother Raphael. His heart missed a beat when he recognized the teal blue eyes that haunted his nightmares. Unconsciously, he straightened up to shield Satoko with his body, to protect her from a possible attack.

"Yo, Leo! You don't seem happy to see me, Bro! Yet you appreciated my gift, right?" he asked with a drawling voice.

Leo didn't answer, bracing himself for everything, while Mikey dropped a bag that seemed heavy.

"I'm coming back from my trip, I'm worn out, so I hope you will leave me a little place in your bed."

A spicy and peculiar smell was coming from Mikey, who was familiar but Leo could nail it. All his faculties were concentrated towards the untimely arrival of his younger brother. His gaze zeroed on the watch that Mikey still wore, the one who remotely controlled his collar. Mikey's intentions could not be read from his stance or face. But what Leo could say was that, within a month, Mikey had gained mass again.

With the assurance of a jaguar, Mikey climbed onto the bed, kissed his brother with passion, disregarding how Leo winced away.

"I missed you, Sweetie. I thought of you every moment. I bought you new gifts. I hope you like them as much as the one I gave you before leaving…"

Mikey's voice took on a greedy intonation and he took Satoko by the chin.

"It is true that she is gorgeous... I was generous. I bet her kisses taste like raspberries. And before Leo, who hadn't seen it coming, stopped him, he crushed his lips on Satoko's.

Outraged, Leo snatched Satoko away from Mikey.

"How dare you….

Mikey frowned, displeased.

"I bought her mostly for you, okay, but it wasn't you who taught me how to share my toys? How greedy it's from you to not share your goodies."

"Satoko is not a toy," Leo retorted. "She is a human being, with feeling and ... "

Mikey shook his head

"Feelings? Her? No!" he explained in a mocking voice. "She obeys to be free. I promised her that if she was nice to you, she would be free to start her life over in America."

Leo, very pale, glanced at her. Satoko bent her neck in acceptance to what Mikey had just said and he felt a cold pit in his chest.

"My consort seems to have had a lot of fun with you. You respected your part of the contract, Satoko," Mikey continued, ruthless, ignoring his brother's ashen face. "But, I want to taste you before I release you." Mikey has a shark-like grin. "Spread your legs."

To the former leader's dismay, Satoko spread her leg, shamelessly exposing her sex still damped with fluid. Carelessly, Mikey grazed the courtesan's slit with his finger, before leaning over her cunt, in the obvious intent to please her with his tongue. Leo stayed still, his heart racing as crazy, feeling so soul crushed that it's hurt more than what he ever felt, ashamed to have been taken by a fool and rubbed in his face by Mikey. He truly had loved her, but he should have known better. He wasn't any better than Don and Raph who believed in such an impossible tale as interspecies love. Mikey turned toward him, his pupils dilated by desire.

"Your taste is still in her ... I'm going to lick her to your last drop ..."

Disgusted, getting out of bed as if he had been burned, his electric pulse collar being the last thing on his mind for the moment, Leo strode away.

"Baby, you should stay…" Mikey shouted. There was the hint of something into Mikey's voice, a bitter form of mockery. "Come on! Don't be like that! I have no problem sharing her and besides, you know I only love you! Don't be jealous!"

Without looking back, Leo raised his hand to say that he didn't want anything to do with them. He left the apartment and his first thought was for the elevator.

To hell with prudence, he had to do something, especially if this something was as far as possible from where his heart had just been broken.

Slash was there with the crocodile, Leather Head. If he wanted to pass, it would be over their dead body and since Leo was unarmed, he was the one most likely to die. But he was past the point to care about self-preservation.

Without speaking to them, he stood before them.

"I'm going out"

At the same time, the elevator opened and Raphael appeared.

"Fearless?" You're awake? I was going to train! How about a little sparring?"

Relieved to see the familiar face from someone he could speak, Leo managed to hold back the time to drag Raphael to the Dojo. He never to let off some steam so desperately.

When the Dojo doors were closed and they were getting in fighting position, Leo saw himself in the mirror. He was green and monstrous and he visualized the ethereal grace of Satoko at his side. How could he have been so naive? He rushed to his opponent, the bokken raised and fought so fiercely that Raphael, stopped and proposed Leo vent off if something was upsetting him. Drained, Leo dropped the bokken and he spilled his troubled soul to Raph. How he was feeling like suffocating, convinced that Mikey was hiding serious information from them and how Satoko had been an oasis in this hopeless desert of his life. Or at least he had believed it, but it was only a mirage. Even if Raphael had never been a great listener, this time Raph listened to the end.

"I don't understand what you have fallen for this unknown girl, when you have Mike, who would walk on hot embers for you. That she was human and a geisha should have been enough telling for you to know it wasn't real. Besides, she did to you what you do to Mike, right? You are docile, you let yourself be groped and fucked, not for love or desire, but to get the hell out from here," Raph pointed out.

Although the voice of Raphael was devoid of aggression, a bad feeling invaded Leonardo. Indeed, the situation was too similar to be fortuitous.

Suddenly worried, he decided to leave the Dojo, despite Raph's calls. The two mutants of the elevator got in their way, for a moment, but smaller and more agile, Leo slipped between their legs. Something was wrong and he absolutely wanted to be clear of it as soon as possible.

When he entered the apartment, he was surprised to find it empty from people. However, Satoko instrument was still there, a familiar silhouette, across the bay window, told him that Michelangelo was on the terrace, near the carp pond. He ran to join him, to notice that his brother was alone.

"Where is she?" he questioned, his voice clipped.

Mikey turned his eyes towards him, looking disillusioned and a cigarette in hand. It was so wrong and weird to see this that Leo stayed stunned a moment.

"Without you, it wasn't as exciting, I told her to leave." Mikey paused a moment, the time to drag on his cigarette. I gave her a check and she didn't wait to say you goodbye," he concluded, shrugging. "I was looking forward to seeing you, Leo. I was gone for weeks, to let you breathe ... I didn't think you would welcome me like this. And then, I am tired again. Your reaction just reminded me of how a handful you are."

He took a puff again and Leo, who was about to retort that if he was so bothersome, Mikey could kick him out, finally identified the smell that seemed to permeate his brother. He had fought crime enough to know that it was cannabis. Leo put aside his heartache; the big brother in him took over.

After all, Satoko was just a courtesan he didn't really know. If Mikey was doing drugs even mild one, that means that there was something wrong. He finally noticed the tired features of his brother. He slapped his brother's hand to drop the joint.

"What's going on with you, Michelangelo? Where were you? What the hell happened to make you like this? Do you forget who you are?"he questioned, dead serious. "It's against everything Master Splinter and I taught you!"

"This is your first concern? Geez." He rolled his eyes. "Well, I guess I should be thrilled you care for me," Mikey snickered bitterly.

"Of course, I care! I didn't know you were…" Leo searched the word: troubled? Going bad? Upset? 

"You don't understand, Leo." Mikey sighed, interrupting him. "Let's make a deal. We'll take a shower, go to bed and discuss it tomorrow ... I'm exhausted. I don't think I have the strength to touch you, even after one month without any."

Leo, said nothing for a moment, scrutinizing his brother. For once, this one did not seem to be thinking about psychological games. He seemed genuinely dead from fatigue and ... sad. And for Mikey to not be horny was a testimony of how beaten he was feeling.

Probably Mikey was suffering from what had happened with the Geisha. Leo refrains from thinking of the girl. His brother had wanted to offer him an ethically dubious but aesthetically exquisite present and Leo, like a teenager, had let himself be taken in by the charms of the courtesan. Mikey seemed genuinely determined to please him and, at least, was sincere when he said he was attracted to Leonardo. It was neither greed nor freedom that motivated him. Michelangelo loved him for him. Raph may have been right. He was looking elsewhere for an illusion when he might have everything he needed in front of him. Mikey did everything he could to demonstrate his passion. No matter what means he used.

"Do you like the pond?" Mike asked in a weary voice, staring at the reflections of the moon on the moving water.

Leo nodded.

"Let's go back" Mikey decided with a shiver. "I only hope I didn't catch typhus or malaria in while I was in Asia"

Leo opened his eyes wide. Mikey had been in Asia? But how? It's been a while he had stopped to wonder about Mikey's money source, but to travel that far was surprising. Mikey wasn't very discreet, despite being a ninja.

"Tomorrow, Leo," Mikey begged. "And in exchange for your patience, I take that away from you ..." Mikey approached Leo and unclipped the collar after having disabled it with his watch.

With a trembling hand, Leo touched his bare neck, finally, after six months.

"It wasn't to humiliate you, I was just afraid, you understand ... I will try to be more attentive to your needs ..." Mikey trailed off.

He wrapped Leo's shell in his arms.

"I missed you. Too much. I won't leave without you anymore, anywhere… let's go to bed," Mikey murmured his head in the crook of his elder's neck.

Leo returned the hug after a brief moment. Mikey had understood what he did was wrong and regretted it. He had taken off his collar and seemed ready for a more open dialogue. Then, there, head on his shoulder, he seemed again his fragile little brother he knew.

He smiled gently:

Perhaps his life wasn't so horrible, after all.

"Yes, Mike. Let's go to bed. "


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dark, character (not a turtle) death

It had been almost a month since Satoko left and Mikey had returned. This one had told him about his Asian trip, from where he had brought back fabulous souvenir gifts for his big brother. Mikey also had studied the art of love, he had pretended. But Leo ignored many aspects of the trip, like how Mikey had been able to afford this trip, to begin with. What Leo retained, however, was that Mikey had declared that the separation had done him some good and cleared his mind. Mikey said he had figured out what Leo didn't like: the collar, the permanent bottom position, Mikey's possessiveness, and the fact of never going outside.

Michelangelo had therefore adjusted, accepting to bottom, sometimes, in their intimacy and authorizing him to face whoever he wanted to at the Dojo. More importantly, he no longer had the collar and sometimes went out closely watched, but still.

Leonardo didn't have the opportunity to discover what was hidden in the building yet, because the elevator took them down to the ground floor where a limousine came to pick them up, shortly before dark.

Michelangelo sometimes rented a restaurant, a boat, or a movie theater for them alone, something incredible considering their mutant appearance. No one was asking questions and the ex-leader wasn’t longer bothering to ask them. He knew that Mikey would probably answer with a lie, and since Satoko, Leo couldn't stand lies anymore. He preferred to play along, even if it was shady.

He had picked up all over the apartment the paper cranes made by the overly pretty geisha. He hadn't had the heart to burn them and had stored them in a small box, out of reach of Michelangelo. Since he was free to move on their floor, he could have a semblance of privacy without the constant threat of the collar. When putting them away, he noticed kanji calligraphy on them, but didn't want to unfold the paper to read what had been written. It would only be more lies.

Leonardo had therefore decided to try to be satisfied with the lifestyle that Mikey offered him. Donnie had spoken to him about it the day before, looking a bit nostalgic: Leo had a much better life than before, they were all together and Michelangelo loved him.  
Leo had felt bad: His brothers were single, and Mikey had to perceive Don and Raph's loneliness or the awkwardness of Leo, because, Mikey was no longer showing off touching him in front of their brothers. Leonardo had been relieved. Mikey had installed a love swing in their apartment and Leo would have died on the spot if their other siblings had seen him in this position.

It was in the evening, and he and Mikey were seated in front of their meal, a plate of shrimp curry and a salad. Well, it had been planned. Every day, Leo had to check on a list of what he wanted to eat, but in fact, only the salad was in front of Leonardo, Mikey not being in the mood to cook.

The youngest was dark and Leo didn't understand why. Since Satoko's departure, he had tried to be loving instead of just docile with Michelangelo.  
The conversation was dull and Leonardo, knowing that his brother, if he hadn't spoken to him yet, wouldn't tell him anything, tried to bring the conversation to a trivial matter. They were in Spring now and carps were swimming in the pond. Mikey had put a lot of effort into the terrace and garden design. Leo guessed it was to compensate for his lack of freedom.

"I have no more pellets to feed the carps. I can supplement with lettuce, but you understand, there twenty of them, and with their size…"

Mikey indifferently proposed the uneaten shrimp and promised he would call the supplier the next day.

Leo shook his head;

"No, this variety is vegetarian, they won't eat any shrimp ... Mikey? What's going on?" he asked, concerned.

Michelangelo had just paled horribly, but he had no time to answer Leo’s question, all the lights went out, leaving the only remaining light the candlestick in front of them that Mikey lit for the atmosphere.

Michelangelo uttered a string of curses that took Leo aback.

"Stay here, Leo. Don't go out," he said while standing up, looking very worried. "It could be dangerous," he said and by his voice, Leo knew Mikey meant it.

Leonardo hated to stay on the bench. He wasn't a coward, he wanted to know what was there so he too could keep his siblings safe. Mikey threw out a few explanations about the Foot ninjas who may have discovered their lair before rushing out. 

Leo frowned: his brother seemed so usually in control that it seemed as if he had forgotten all possible forms of threat against them. Leonardo insisted that he could be useful.

"If you leave this floor Leo, I promise you that we will bury you with your collar."

Michelangelo's voice was so heartfelt that Leo was paralyzed. Mikey shut the door and Leo heard his younger brother scolding Donnie over the phone.

He remained alone for a few minutes in the apartment, then decided to go out on the terrace. The terrace was part of the floor and was allowed and, maybe by leaning towards the street, he would see something. Was it a general breakdown?

He pulled the shrimp out from the fridge. Perhaps the carps were going to eat them, if they were hungry enough they would and with this power outage, they would lose the shrimp anyway. 

With the candlestick in hand, the bag of shrimp in the other, he went to the pond, and suddenly stopped, dropping the crustaceans bag.

At the water's surface, there was a body. The combined lights of the moon and lights of the neighboring buildings were enough for him to detect the identity, her pale skin emerging with long, wet, black hair.

Satoko's face was lifted to the moon and not yet decomposed enough for Leo to not recognize her. Likewise, lit by candles, the chain mark blackening her neck was still visible and nausea violently took him over while his heart was hammering at full speed, in a grip of terror.

Leo knew exactly what type of chain could have caused that bruise. The length was perfect for this.

It was the chain of a nunchuck.

*******  
Leo's brain didn't have time to send to his legs the message to run, he was already doing it, running as if his life depended on it because it was probably the case.

He knew that at the end of the corridor, drowned in darkness because of the power failure, he would fall on Slash, but the horrible blue turtle seemed infinitely less frightening to him than his own little brother today. Leo thought only of putting the most distance between him and the corpse floating in the pond. He had often brushed death during his young existence but never had death taken the figure of an exquisite body he had caressed with love, a short time before. Satoko's nymph body was now swollen and greenish and her fresh lotus smell had been replaced by the pestilential smell of rotting meat.

Satoko was dead, and her killer's identity was obvious, even without the chain mark of eight inches long.

Mikey, his little brother who, two years earlier would have said that his worst sin was gluttony, had cold bloodily killed this innocent girl, younger than himself.

Leo had no trouble deducing Sakoto's "crime," to deserve this fate.

Leo had fallen in love with her, in addition to having sex with her. Mikey somehow must have been spying on them all along his supposed journey and therefore, knew it. Had he only left the building during this month of absence? Leonardo doubted it. Mikey had only installed a trap, waiting motionless, as if like a Venus flytrap, before closing it on his unfortunate prey.

But why, why? Why Mikey had induced him into the temptation to kill her, right after?  
The former leader had no time to waste on reflection, already anticipating having to fight for his freedom and his life with Slash. But, when he arrived at the elevator, he had the brief surprise of not seeing anyone posted at the gates of his jail.

He didn't take the time to be surprised any longer and ran to the Dojo to find a weapon that he could use as a tool, allowing him to open the elevator's metal doors. Unfortunately, Mikey had done a good job of making sure no weapons were lying around. Like a madman, he then ran in the opposite direction and returned to the apartment to take from the kitchen island drawer a butter knife, the most lethal weapon that Mikey left at his reach.

Returning to the elevator, still unsupervised, he pressed it into the slit, in order to enlarge it and to be able to pass his hand inside and open the door. He was not stupid. He was well aware that, without power, the elevator couldn't function, but he could descend using the rope. Of course, the risk of that being, that if the power were to come back, the elevator would restart and crush him, but it was a risk that he preferred to take.

Not hesitating, he jumped to grab the rope. Luckily, the elevator seemed to be at the bottom, giving him the latitude to go down as much as possible to the ground floor or the basement and therefore, the exit. He suspected that, probably, he would encounter obstacles to his escape, like Mikey's friends or his own brothers. If that were the case, he wouldn't waste a precious minute trying to reason with them or pity them. For him, it was now clear that Donatello and Raphael were playing for the orange team, and so, despite it making his heart ache, they were the enemy if they tried to stop him.

As he let himself down while holding onto the rope, he wondered what that sudden power outage meant. It was too timely. Was it another trap? Mikey wanted to offer Leo the possibility of fleeing and then justify a redoubling of violence and coercion? However, the other turtle had looked fairly mellow in the past few weeks. But that didn't mean anything because, beneath his facade of a sweet and loving lover, Mikey had hidden the sadistic grin of a murderer.

He refused to think of Satoko. Whether she loved him or only pretended, the young geisha didn't deserve death. She was only a fragile flower who couldn't oppose any resistance to her master. She probably hadn't even struggled. He thought briefly of the origami cranes that had scattered the apartment and wished he had taken the time to read their messages. Maybe there was a warning. Maybe from the start, Satoko knew she was doomed.

He finally touched the top of the elevator shaft with his feet, his hands aching from the rope's friction. He managed to get inside by lifting the hatch of the elevator top, with his butter knife, he widened the slit of the door opening in order to slide his hands out.

When he succeeded, he entered a room submerged in total darkness. Leo could smell the characteristic copper odor of blood. He saw no way out. But, warily, he advanced despite everything. Turning back was death, or slavery anyway, a fate not tempting at all. He preferred dying trying to get out.

But the closer he came, the more he felt something, like a call. Except that he didn't hear the call with his ears, but with ... his mind.

Suddenly, he understood the sensation he felt, which he had forgotten over time. Somewhere, hidden in the dark, Splinter, his spiritual father, called him and with each step, the connection with his spirit became stronger, Leo distinctly heard his master calling him.

Then, at a time when the voice grew louder in his head, the lights came back on and although the lighting was dim, as it is in dungeons, Leo uttered a muffled exclamation of terror in front of the spectacle which was offered to his eyes.

The rat had almost no fur left on it and the fur that it had left was drenched with blood, but that wasn’t the worst: Splinter had no hands or feet, and empty sockets stared at Leonardo. And yet, his Sensei was alive, bathed in his own filth.

"Sensei!" Leo exclaimed, distraught, shaking the tiny cage's bars, so narrow and low, to the point where, even amputated, Master Splinter could not stand up or lay down. "What happened to you? Who did this to you?"

The old rat shook his head and opened his mouth and, with a shudder of horror and indignation, the former leader realized that the rat's tongue had also been severed.  
But Splinter's voice echoed in his mind.

_"Leonardo, my son. Don't worry about me, old and dying. We have to save you.”_

Leo shook his head and suddenly, despite what had happened, his first reflex was to tell his brothers about it. They were still a family. No doubt, Mikey didn't know their Sensei was here. With the help of Michelangelo and his friends, he could defeat anyone who detained and tortured Splinter. Maybe that would even fix whatever damaged his bond with his brothers.

"Master, I am not alone. Your other sons are there, we will get you out of here! Michelangelo has many friends. We are all getting out of here," Leo promised, frantic.

_"My poor son. Have you looked around?_

Then, Leonardo noticed the presence of the other cells. A glance at the one on the right is enough. Despite her swollen and bloody face, the red hair was still easily recognizable. 

And then he understood.

April, or rather, a picture of a tied up April, had been given to Donatello as a delayed Christmas present. Donnie had been able to spill all of his frustrations of rejected love on the girl who had rejected him. He didn't need to look in the other cell. He knew: Casey, Raphael's gift. This is how Mikey had won their loyalty. 

_"He died several weeks ago. This does not prevent Raphael from coming down here. Your brother Donatello is more careful. He knows how to stretch the tortures without his victim dying,"_ Splinter confirmed. _"That boy had always been very cautious with his toys."_  
A shiver of disgust ran down Leo’s spine.

"I will save you! Mikey must be being controlled by your enemy, Shredder. Maybe I can make him hear reason ... He claims to have feelings for me!" Leo confessed. Even if it was something he felt so distressed to confess, there wasn't time to be shy about it. If Mikey helped them ... maybe, maybe he could forget what had happened with Satoko.

He heard laughter, or rather, a horrible gurgling sound, coming out of Splinter:

_"Shredder died, right after he captured me while I was coming back from my pilgrimage, almost two years ago. Karai took over. She wanted to exchange me for you. I was his bait to have you by her sides. She really wanted you."_

Leonardo made a movement of joy. Karai would be much easier to get around than Shredder. But Splinter cut his hope short:

_"Turn around.”_

Despite the fear compressing his chest, Leo turned around slowly to see, on a pedestal, a jar in which floated the perfectly preserved head of Karai. It was too much. The memory of her lips that he had passionately kissed, closed forever, and now, exhibited indecently, made him sick.

_"Leonardo. He approaches. This blackout that I managed to cause had exhausted my last reserves, listen to me… you have only one way to save yourself…"_

Leo didn't listen, too overwhelmed by the successive waves of trauma. He suddenly burst out, hysterical.

"But then who controls Michelangelo? If it's not Shredder or Karai… Who is the head of the Foot? Who has poisoned his mind and held the strings?"

_"Who else but your brother Michelangelo himself? The very evening of his disappearance, he killed Karai publicly. She wanted you, but he wanted you much more. The Foot, seeing him so fierce and determined took him as their leader, as their traditions require. He is the new Shredder. Almost daily, he boasted to me of his prowess, while torturing me.”_

"But ... his injuries? His rapes?" Leo protested, refusing to believe it, feeling himself slipping into madness.

 _"Staging, to touch your generous soul, my son. He injured himself or ordered his own men to abuse him. But that's not what matters. Your brother probably chipped you to locate you. You can't run away like this… I don’t know what happened between the both of you,”_ Master Splinter urged. _“But it’s affected him so much that, to get you dependent on him, it’s an obsession. Your brother managed to get you here because he knows your weaknesses and your way of thinking. Do the opposite of what you would have done and ..."_

Suddenly the elevator signal rang and Leo panicked, looking around for an object he could use to defend himself. He didn't have the time, he was immediately thrown on the floor. Michelangelo, eyes bright with anger under his helmet, pinned him to the ground with his superior weight. And Leo understood that his father had only told the most accurate truth. His brother wore the Kuro Kabuto of the Foot clan's leader.

"I know a tale, Leo, that I had heard on a trip." Mikey's eyes were flashing under the helmet. "Once upon a time, a man had warned his pretty little wife not to open the door to a secret room. He covered her in gold with jewels, parties ... But this little bitch could not be satisfied with it. At a single moment, he turned his back, she opened the door….and well...she didn't like what she saw...but it's her fault. She was fine to not know, but she disobeyed and had to face the consequences," he finished in a growl. "Why are you so hard to deal with? Why couldn't you be content with what I had offered you? Why?" Mikey shouted, now sounding almost in despair. "Now, I have to punish you! I wasn't looking forward to it! But you leave me no choice!"

Leo felt a rage as he had never felt, invaded him and with a herculean force, caused by adrenaline, he managed to shove his brother away.

"I'm not your pretty wife," he roared, too carried away by all the reproaches he wanted to scream at Mikey. He didn't know where to start: Splinter, Karai, Satoko… and even Casey and April, at least. Mikey had wanted to enlist the support of his brothers, to isolate the leader and also to get them involved. Raph and Don also had their hands stained. “I want nothing to do with you!”

At the same moment, his two other brothers came out of nowhere and each grabbed him by an arm to immobilize him.

"Oh? You’re not my pretty wife? Is that the reason for your anger? Do you want a ring? It's the only thing I haven't given you yet! But if that's what you want ... "Mikey mocked. “There nothing I wouldn’t do for you to be finally content and stop fighting me! You know who I truly am. I’m powerful!” he exclaimed. “We can eat in the best restaurant. We can have a brand new TV! I can bring you in Japan in my own private jet. I owe my own private Island! I have thousands of people working for me, for you, if you stop being so stubborn!”Mikey was now excited. “I guess it’s a blessing in disguise you found it. Hiding it from you was getting old.”

Suddenly Leo saw him for what Mikey really was. 

Somewhere, his little brother was dead, his zest for life completely sucked up by some emotional wound, leaving only darkness in this juvenile soul. Now, Leo would no longer let the memory of their past brotherhood hold back his gestures or words. Mikey had fooled him, manipulated him, deceived, because Mikey, his little brother, was no more. He knew it himself, hence his insistence on changing his name: he was Mike, a monster, terrifying, unpredictable, and dangerous who climbed to the top of a criminal organization over the body of his father and his rivals. How could Mikey think Leo would be seduced by it? How he could belive Leo would enjoy Japan with the one that allowed their father was tortured?

"I'll never be yours, Mike. Never again. How could you do this to Master Splinter? You disgust me!" Helpless from being solidly maintained by Donnie and Raph, impassive, Leo could only express his fury by spitting in the face of the new Shredder. “Monster!”

Mike wiped his face. How furious he was, blatant.

"You hurt me, Leo, really. But you can't have two Masters. You don’t need the old one anymore." And with a sharp gesture, he threw a silver flash in the direction of Splinter. Horrified, Leo saw the shuriken slice the carotid artery and Splinter collapsed, as blood flowed from his wound in a slow broth.

He screamed and struggled like a madman, spitting out the worst insults from his repertoire, rich thanks to almost 20 years alongside Raphael.

"Put him in the same cell, since he loved the old rat so much. After a while with his rotting corpse, he may find me and our penthouse less repulsive," the new Shredder spat sarcastically.  
  
Leo screamed that he would never and he preferred to die, cursing his brothers and calling them a murderer and parricide.

Mikey approached and closed his gloved black hand around Leo's throat, squeezing it, digging his fingers into the flesh.

"Do you really prefer to die? We will see."

Leo listened, like a ringing bell to his temple, and his lungs burned by the lack of air. That was it, he was about to die, by Mikey’s hand from all people, and this was such an absurd and grim reality he didn’t want to know anything of it, that he tried to stay calm through the agony. 

It was Donatello who saved him by his very clinical logic.

"Stop, you're going to kill him. It's the opposite of what you want, right?"

The manic glow faded, as Mikey gradually let go of Leo’s neck.

"Yeah, sure, I won't do like Raph, or like you. I'm nothing like you,” he denied, not caring if the comment could offend his brothers. “I just get carried away. It’s like he drove me crazy on purpose.” Michelangelo ran his hand on his face, under the helmet. “You did well to stop me. He can be an ungrateful bastard, but, it would have broken my heart.”

Released, Leo fell to the ground onto his knees. Trying to catch his breath, he felt the collar, of which he had lost the sensation of, closing on him and before he could even protest, if he had even been able to recover his voice, was being dragged into the cell where Splinter’s body was and Mikey closed the screen door tightly. There was no room at all and he was almost laying over Master Spinter’s corpse.

"Mediate on this, Leo. Come with me, upstairs, in luxury, being worshiped and loved, or here, with the corpses as the only company. I may love you, but don’t push me. My patience has limits."

Leo didn't answer, his throat still too painful to produce words. Mikey continued talking to him or Donnie and Raph, but Leo couldn’t tell. He only heard the blood buzzing in his ears. He didn’t look at them or speak to them, as if paralyzed by the shock, and didn’t realize until much later that the three other mutants had left the basement.

Even in thought, he didn’t name them his brothers.


End file.
